Society & Culture Worst. Excuse Ever.

[cats2rise]

Now I must admit, I am great at getting extensions at uni and was always great at thinking on the spot when it came to teachers in High School. I could bullshit my way through life.

However, my mate showed me an email convo between him and our uni lecturer today and hands down, this has got to be the worst excuse I have ever heard of... This is it word for word. I got him to print off the email just so I can show people who wont believe me.

HIM: Hi. Every time I have tried to do my essay in the last week I have suddenly felt really tired. Could I please have an extension until Friday to hand it in?

LECTURER: Second most outrageous excuse I have ever heard. Less beers, more sleep. Get it in by Friday.

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So the topic for the thread is: What are worst (or best depending which way you look at it) excuses have you used or heard of for high school, uni or work whether it be for essays or being late?

 

[r dub 19]

First name greatest.

 

[DidakDelight]

ME: Sorry Boss I can't come to work today because I got sunstroke walking home last night and as a result ended up only sleeping 2 hours last night.

BOSS: You're full of sh1t, but there's nothing I can do about it. Rest up and I'll see ypu tomorrow

 

[Bourky23]

hahahahaha the OP is gold

i wouldn't even have the balls to try something that lame.

 

[Damon_3388]

We used to have homeroom (messages, announcements, etc.) from 8:45am-8:55am at high school, and we were supposed to be there seated by 8:40am. I only lived 6km away, but my bus sometimes took 40-45 minutes in the morning, depending on the traffic. Sometimes I'd get there with plenty of time to spare, and other times I'd be a bit late. Anyway, I strolled in at 8:50am one morning, greeted with "You're a bit late" from my homeroom teacher, said in a "please explain" kind of tone. I responded with "Yea, I don't think the bus driver was pressing the accelerator hard enough."

 

[yeah_nah]

St Kilda Players - Her facebook said she was older i swear!!

Police - She still wears nappies...

 

[darsh!]

My mate got an extension by sayin " i lost my licence a couple of months back and its been hard getting to and from uni"

he is also a bullshit artist, he waited until the lecturer handed back essay results to us, an essay my mate never bothered doing.
so my mate then goes up to the lecturer and asks "so wheres mine?"
They both go up to the lecturers office and of coarse finding nothing so the lecturer told him to hand it in as soon as he can find another copy.

 

[graps]

I know a woman who called into work saying that she couldn't come in because she had "rigor mortis" and would be back the next day.
Obviously she isn't too bright and her boss just accepted the excuse in shock.

 

[ash_1050]

he is also a bullshit artist, he waited until the lecturer handed back essay results to us, an essay my mate never bothered doing.
so my mate then goes up to the lecturer and asks "so wheres mine?"
They both go up to the lecturers office and of coarse finding nothing so the lecturer told him to hand it in as soon as he can find another copy.

Quality

 

[WALL-e]

What was the MOST rediculous the teacher had heard I wonder.

 

[Simon_Nesbit]

When I was a kid working in a Supermarket I fell off a ladder, and hurt my ankle. Hurt it to the point of unbearable pain every time I put weight on it, and couldn't walk. It took me nearly 15 minutes to hop/drag myself out of the storeroom to try and find help.

Was I allowed to leave? No. Instead I was sent to the checkouts, so I wouldn't have to walk on it. I finished my shift about 3 hours later, and used a trolley to hop to my mum's car.

Seeing my discomfort she took me to the doctor, who after seeing the swollen foot sent me for x-rays immediately.

I had a broken ankle.

I called work the next day to tell them what I'd done, and that I needed them to sign a workers compensation form. Firstly, they didn't believe me, and secondly, my boss hadn't filled in an incident form, and told me it was too late now so I wasn't covered. Being a 15 year old kid, I just took their word, and spent my time at home rehabilitating.

I was fired for not turning up to work, despite being in hospital most of the night prior.

Six weeks later I went and worked for their major competition. (Yeah, that'll teach 'em ).

Looking back now, I'm horrified at the way I was treated.

 

[WALL-e]

That's ****ed.

 

[RooBoys16]

I was working as a Christmas Casual at a Retail Store last year, and we were getting pretty busy at one stage just before the new year. Well anyway i rocked up to work, and the managers were discussing the roster on who'd they keep and people they'd let go.
Well apparently they fired another bloke i was working with because he came into work 20minutes late. When asked "Why where you late" he replied with "I was buying chapstick"
The next time i saw him.. i was like "why say such a thing, you could of come up with something more believable then that"

Ahh well this store ill remain nameless (Surf Store) are just greedy greedy asses.

 

[Football God]

This kd in my class was late, teacher asked him why he was late.
he responded in his own words: "i forgot the bacon"...... swear; this kid was on something.

 

[RooBoys16]

he responded in his own words: "i forgot the bacon"...... swear; this kid was on something.

Quality

 

[lions_den]

Since a couple of stories are kind of off topic I'll add this.

It was year 10 and the first class of the year for IT. There was this guy and I can't even remember his name TBH, wasn't around long, maybe a year. He was a big guy, big and extremely stupid/dopey and spoke the way he looked, deep and slow.

Anyway the first lesson was on definitions, such as RAM, and how many mb's in a gb, etc. After about 20-30 minutes the teacher stopped and said "Are there any questions?", and the dumb shit replied, "What's a computer?", everyone pissed themselves laughing and we still do when someone brings it up. Probably one of those moments where you had to be there though.

 

[cats2rise]

What was the MOST rediculous the teacher had heard I wonder.

My mate emailed him back and asked.

Lecturer: Why didnt you come to class yesterday?
Kid: I thought it was Saturday all day.

 

[Bell2004]

Well 2 years ago right, i was doing Work Experience in Target here , i was gonna help my mate stack the magazines at the front counter and the guy who works at the back told me i can help him out. Suddenly, the manager comes up and ask up "why does it take two people to push the trolley" i was like "the guy told at the back to help me mate out." She yelled and told me to go to at the back. I'm never gonna work at Target here in Epping after that incident.

 

[darsh!]

Not really an excuse but I remembered another example from the same uni mate.
We had an essay which was 1000 words and he again manages to get a weeks extension for it.

His essay was 400 words and he wrote "please don't mark me harshly" underneath.

 

[Benno_900]

In year 9, we had this really old form teacher marking the attendance. Whenever somebody was late, they'd climb through the window behind him/to his right and he'd never notice (it happened 2-3 times a week). So afterward, they could just claim he didn't call out their name.

So the obvious excuse when entering through the door while late: "The window was closed".

 

[Big Cox]

My mate got an extension by sayin " i lost my licence a couple of months back and its been hard getting to and from uni"

he is also a bullshit artist, he waited until the lecturer handed back essay results to us, an essay my mate never bothered doing.
so my mate then goes up to the lecturer and asks "so wheres mine?"
They both go up to the lecturers office and of coarse finding nothing so the lecturer told him to hand it in as soon as he can find another copy.

Happened to me but I geniuenly did hand it in. Lecturer didnt believe me despite me showing him the save date on the document. He reckons I could of changed it. Ended up with 28% after handing it late. What a ****

 

[clivewaterhousen]

Guy was late to school when we were in year 12 and said "I was locked in the house cos my mum went out and bought bread" the guy walked to school every day lived about 5 minutes away. Another time he said he was finding alternate routes to school so that's why he was late

 

[Xtreme]

We used to have homeroom (messages, announcements, etc.) from 8:45am-8:55am at high school, and we were supposed to be there seated by 8:40am. I only lived 6km away, but my bus sometimes took 40-45 minutes in the morning, depending on the traffic. Sometimes I'd get there with plenty of time to spare, and other times I'd be a bit late. Anyway, I strolled in at 8:50am one morning, greeted with "You're a bit late" from my homeroom teacher, said in a "please explain" kind of tone. I responded with "Yea, I don't think the bus driver was pressing the accelerator hard enough."

I used the "stuck in traffic" excuse many times in high school, the hilarious thing was that i only lived 5 minutes away (easy walking distance) .

I used another bizarre, but legit excuse throughout year 12.... ran late to most of my starting classes in the morning as the combination lock for my locker rarely worked (it wouldn't click open in cold weather). I'd get in trouble either way, if i was late due to trying to get it open.... or i'd be in trouble for bringing my bag inside the classroom as a result of not being able to open my locker.

 

[Mattman93]

Guy was late to school when we were in year 12 and said "I was locked in the house cos my mum went out and bought bread" the guy walked to school every day lived about 5 minutes away. Another time he said he was finding alternate routes to school so that's why he was late

Haha alternate routes to school. Gold.

 

[frantelle]

I have a mate who used to literally live across the road from high school. If you were late you had to sign in and cite a reason. He asked another one of my mates to sign in for him, anyway teacher going through the morning notices in period 2 looks up and says, "so the traffic was really that bad today huh?"