Rd 23 - Sydney v Richmond
vs
Wednesday Morning. John Longmire ponders his team for the crucial clash against the dangerous Tigers.
He picks up the phone.
Longmire: “Buddy! Haven’t seen you for a couple of days. Where are you?”
Lance Franklin: “I’m still at the Soho Bar, Horse. Rehab”.
Longmire: “But we have a big game this week. Will you be ready?”
Franklin “Naah, it’s the bye week before the finals, mate, remember? A bit of R&R, we agreed”.
Longmire: “No, Buddy – that’s next week. We’ve got Richmond this Saturday. It’s not a bye”!
Franklin: (silence)
Longmire: “It’s not a bye!”
(Silence)
Longmire: “Look, is Hanners there? I’ll talk to him”.
Dan Hanneberry: “Horse maaaate! How ya going? Hey, Hey!!”
Longmire: “Hanners! I need you for this week against Richmond! Get out of the Soho, and get down here”.
Hanneberry: “Richmond, eh? Hmmmm. Look Horse, I’m not feeling that great, and we’ve got finals coming up – thanks, love, keep ‘em coming – so I need some serious therapy. Couldn’t we just run out the academy team and see how they go”?
Longmire: “You can’t put a team of academy kids up against an AFL-standard side! They’ll get slaughtered. Richmond will……..Richmond will…………..Richmond…………….Richmond………..”
(Pause)
Longmire: “Hanners? I’ll be there in 10. JB and Coke, thanks. Get the rest of the senior guys together. Oh, they’re there already? Good. Tell Stuey Dew to get out of there, though. He’s up this week. I’ve got the match plan for him written on the back of a bus-ticket, somewhere. Ummmm, aaaarghhh – can’t find it right now. Look, just don’t kick it at Rance, OK? That’ll do.”
Once again, old foes Richmond and the Swans face off in another critical match that has all football fans on the edge of their seats. Boasting a long and storied history, this clash is usually seen as one of the season’s highlights, and this year is no exception. Bodies will be pushed beyond physical limits, blood will be spilled, hearts will be broken, and………………………
Sorry.
I tried.
Weren’t the Olympics cool? Can we talk about Bolt? No? Ok….
It’s Rd 23, and as has been the standard for much of the last 20+ years, Richmond are limping to the end of another disappointing season, while the Swans are fine-tuning for another crack at the finals. Expectations for this game are, let’s be honest, not high. It’s likely to be played with all the intensity of a crochet club tea break, with each team focusing on a single key objective.
Swans: “Don’t get hurt”.
Tigers: “Don’t win”.
While both of these goals seem eminently achievable (the major risk of injury comes from an opposition tackle, and since the Swans are facing Richmond, that scenario seems unlikely to arise), surprisingly, it is the Tigers who face the tougher task to avoid victory. Richmond have a very good record against Sydney, even over the last few years when Sydney have been perennial top 4 finishers, and the Tigers………..………haven’t. Nevertheless, 6 of the last 9 encounters have resulted in a win for the Sons Of Dyer, and in some of those games, the Swans were really trying!! (Ok, a few, maybe). John Longmire was asked about Richmond’s seeming hold over the Swans in recent times and his response was recorded below.
The main interest for Richmond fans coming into this game is the battle between Dustin Martin and Alex Rance for the Jack Dyer Medal. Both have had outstanding seasons, with Rance probably having a slight lead, mostly due to the ball being in his immediate vicinity for the majority of every game, and the rest of the backline consisting of swimming pool inflatables purchased on Ebay for 2nd round draft picks.
Aaaah, Rancey..… ….
Jack Riewoldt is also on pace to kick 50 goals for the 8th season in a row – a Richmond record. Poor Jack has had to play Centre Half Forward, Full Forward, Forward Pocket crumber, 3rd tall option, high half-forward, psychotherapist, ground manager, line marker, jumper washer and car park attendant, due to an alarming lack of support inside the forward 50. Richmond have only hit 100 pt 5 times in the season and average less than 10 goals per game against the Top 8 sides.
Tactically, the key match-ups are likely to be those between the Richmond out-of-contract players as they vie to put on the best show for prospective suitors, and their Sydney opponents determined not to be embarrassed by a someone deemed ‘not wanted at a bottom-6 club’.
Richmond hopefully will have a look at a few kids (Sydney certainly will), and it should be a tight,entertaining, high-scoring game that will keep spectators on the edge of their seats, gasping for breath, awake, with the Tigers running away at the end to win by a couple of goals, causing Benny Gale to smile through gritted teeth, Tiger supporters to throw up their hands in frustration, and the AFL to increase Sydney’s COLA by 25%.
Odds: Just don’t. Really, don’t. As a Richmond supporter, your life is a too much of a desperate gamble already.
Wednesday Morning. John Longmire ponders his team for the crucial clash against the dangerous Tigers.
He picks up the phone.
Longmire: “Buddy! Haven’t seen you for a couple of days. Where are you?”
Lance Franklin: “I’m still at the Soho Bar, Horse. Rehab”.
Longmire: “But we have a big game this week. Will you be ready?”
Franklin “Naah, it’s the bye week before the finals, mate, remember? A bit of R&R, we agreed”.
Longmire: “No, Buddy – that’s next week. We’ve got Richmond this Saturday. It’s not a bye”!
Franklin: (silence)
Longmire: “It’s not a bye!”
(Silence)
Longmire: “Look, is Hanners there? I’ll talk to him”.
Dan Hanneberry: “Horse maaaate! How ya going? Hey, Hey!!”
Longmire: “Hanners! I need you for this week against Richmond! Get out of the Soho, and get down here”.
Hanneberry: “Richmond, eh? Hmmmm. Look Horse, I’m not feeling that great, and we’ve got finals coming up – thanks, love, keep ‘em coming – so I need some serious therapy. Couldn’t we just run out the academy team and see how they go”?
Longmire: “You can’t put a team of academy kids up against an AFL-standard side! They’ll get slaughtered. Richmond will……..Richmond will…………..Richmond…………….Richmond………..”
(Pause)
Longmire: “Hanners? I’ll be there in 10. JB and Coke, thanks. Get the rest of the senior guys together. Oh, they’re there already? Good. Tell Stuey Dew to get out of there, though. He’s up this week. I’ve got the match plan for him written on the back of a bus-ticket, somewhere. Ummmm, aaaarghhh – can’t find it right now. Look, just don’t kick it at Rance, OK? That’ll do.”
Once again, old foes Richmond and the Swans face off in another critical match that has all football fans on the edge of their seats. Boasting a long and storied history, this clash is usually seen as one of the season’s highlights, and this year is no exception. Bodies will be pushed beyond physical limits, blood will be spilled, hearts will be broken, and………………………
Sorry.
I tried.
Weren’t the Olympics cool? Can we talk about Bolt? No? Ok….
It’s Rd 23, and as has been the standard for much of the last 20+ years, Richmond are limping to the end of another disappointing season, while the Swans are fine-tuning for another crack at the finals. Expectations for this game are, let’s be honest, not high. It’s likely to be played with all the intensity of a crochet club tea break, with each team focusing on a single key objective.
Swans: “Don’t get hurt”.
Tigers: “Don’t win”.
While both of these goals seem eminently achievable (the major risk of injury comes from an opposition tackle, and since the Swans are facing Richmond, that scenario seems unlikely to arise), surprisingly, it is the Tigers who face the tougher task to avoid victory. Richmond have a very good record against Sydney, even over the last few years when Sydney have been perennial top 4 finishers, and the Tigers………..………haven’t. Nevertheless, 6 of the last 9 encounters have resulted in a win for the Sons Of Dyer, and in some of those games, the Swans were really trying!! (Ok, a few, maybe). John Longmire was asked about Richmond’s seeming hold over the Swans in recent times and his response was recorded below.
The main interest for Richmond fans coming into this game is the battle between Dustin Martin and Alex Rance for the Jack Dyer Medal. Both have had outstanding seasons, with Rance probably having a slight lead, mostly due to the ball being in his immediate vicinity for the majority of every game, and the rest of the backline consisting of swimming pool inflatables purchased on Ebay for 2nd round draft picks.
Aaaah, Rancey..… ….
Jack Riewoldt is also on pace to kick 50 goals for the 8th season in a row – a Richmond record. Poor Jack has had to play Centre Half Forward, Full Forward, Forward Pocket crumber, 3rd tall option, high half-forward, psychotherapist, ground manager, line marker, jumper washer and car park attendant, due to an alarming lack of support inside the forward 50. Richmond have only hit 100 pt 5 times in the season and average less than 10 goals per game against the Top 8 sides.
Tactically, the key match-ups are likely to be those between the Richmond out-of-contract players as they vie to put on the best show for prospective suitors, and their Sydney opponents determined not to be embarrassed by a someone deemed ‘not wanted at a bottom-6 club’.
Richmond hopefully will have a look at a few kids (Sydney certainly will), and it should be a tight,
Odds: Just don’t. Really, don’t. As a Richmond supporter, your life is a too much of a desperate gamble already.