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dwayne ****head russel

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Flawed Genius said:
Let's make rules.

Every time DR says "shorts it", drink some of your beer. Obviously if we said "do a shot of liquor", you'd be dead by about 20 minutes into the first quarter.

"Can get and go" - drink some of your beer and run around the nearest table.

Any overly exaggerated adjective for a simple footballing task - take a shot of whatever liquor you have in your possession.

"Only in your wildest dreams!/In your dreams!" - take a shot and recount your dream from the previous night. If you can't remember your dream, take a shot.

"From little things, big things grow!" - everyone participating in your drinking game takes a shot from smallest to tallest. If you're by yourself, 2 shots.

"That could be the firestarter!" - Somehow light your alcohol on fire and drink it.

"You bet he can!/You bet it is!/You bet he does!" - Take a shot, then bet on when Dwayne will say this phrase again. Winner does not have to take a shot the next time Dwayne says the phrase.

Have I missed anything?
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That's a spear!!!! Or any use of the word spear do a shot and spin around 10 times.

Nails it!! Do a shot and then hammer a nail into a piece of wood. By qtr you would be that pissed you would probably put the nail through your hand and not feel it.
 
Mentallo said:
That's a spear!!!! Or any use of the word spear do a shot and spin around 10 times.
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I like it.

Any time he recounts a useless anecdote from a player's early days or junior football career, everyone takes a shot then tells a story from their primary school/high school days.

"He's DEAD!" - take a shot, then kill one of your mates.
 
If any player can correctly the guess the one word adjective he proclaims after a goal (eg. amazing! inspirational! unbelievable!), all other players finish.
 

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If he uses a phrase, decides he likes it, and then uses the same phrase again before the end of the following quarter, take two shots and work the phrase into your next sentence. Anyone who doesn't work the phrase into their sentence takes another shot.
 
Have always believed that Dwayne had strong (read: "AMAZING!") drinking game potential...

Will try it out this weekend and report back. As mentioned, 'shorts it' should only warrant a couple of sips of beer, lest all players be caught holding the ball ("DEAD!") before half time.
 
"That's gotta be ball!" is met with some testicular hilarity such as lefty popping out of the side pocket or everyone's favourite, fly's eyes.
 
"Plays for the free...


..and gets it!" (everyone on the right sculls)

..doesn't get it!" (everyone on the left sculls)
 
Best way to play it would be to pass an object around the room (preferably a spear or a shoe) after every goal is kicked, kind of like pass the parcel. Whoever is in possession of the shoe/spear when Dwayne uses any of his many novel catch phrases has to drink (you wouldn't want to be 'in possession' during an extended period of play without a goal).

Importantly, your 'go' doesn't end the instant the goal is kicked, it includes what ever hysterical gem Dwayne decides to use as his exclamation mark for that passage of play.

Phrases are weighted accordingly ie. 'shorts it', 'spear' and 'get and go' 2 second drink; 'That's as good as it gets!!!!!oneoneone!' a shot; 'From the paint' half a beer etc.

In fact, I think the game should be called 'Gives It Some Shoe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!', and each player must say this as they pass the shoe to the next unlucky player. If they don't say it, they drink. If they don't say it enthusiastically enough, they drink.

I'm definitely giving this a crack/SOME SHOE!!!!! on the weekend.

EDIT: If a player correctly predicts Dwayne's phrase (SPECTACULAR! AMAZING! GOOD AS IT GETS!! etc) after a goal is kicked, they don't have to drink their allocation, but can instead allocate that drink to another player. They only get one guess, however, and it must be taken quickly.
 
Sharks On A Plane said:
EDIT: If a player correctly predicts Dwayne's phrase (SPECTACULAR! AMAZING! GOOD AS IT GETS!! etc) after a goal is kicked, they don't have to drink their allocation, but can instead allocate that drink to another player. They only get one guess, however, and it must be taken quickly.
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Loving that rule.

I'm totally doing this with a bunch of mates.
 
Flawed Genius said:
Let's make rules.

Every time DR says "shorts it", drink some of your beer. Obviously if we said "do a shot of liquor", you'd be dead by about 20 minutes into the first quarter.

"Can get and go" - drink some of your beer and run around the nearest table.

Any overly exaggerated adjective for a simple footballing task - take a shot of whatever liquor you have in your possession.

"Only in your wildest dreams!/In your dreams!" - take a shot and recount your dream from the previous night. If you can't remember your dream, take a shot.

"From little things, big things grow!" - everyone participating in your drinking game takes a shot from smallest to tallest. If you're by yourself, 2 shots.

"That could be the firestarter!" - Somehow light your alcohol on fire and drink it.

"You bet he can!/You bet it is!/You bet he does!" - Take a shot, then bet on when Dwayne will say this phrase again. Winner does not have to take a shot the next time Dwayne says the phrase.

Have I missed anything?
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"From the paint" - probably the one football phrase that I wish people could be killed outright for using. Horrible, inaccurate, useless phrase. For that perhaps a shot of particularly vicious spirit.

"Nails it" - Same as above. Effigy of Dwayne to be burnt in front garden.
 

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For specific phrases, before the game begins, the group nominates a (as Partridge noted) "particularly vicious spirit", ie absinthe, to be "shotted" when Dwayne rolls out "from the paint" or any other nominated phrase. It must be terribly annoying though, can't be used for "shorts it" or "wildest dreams" or etc.
 
Atheist said:
Surprised nobody has come up with a Dwayne Russell sex commentary skit yet.
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During foreplay: "That could be the firestarter! Can he find the clitoris? You bet he can! Only in your wildest dreams!"

After every thrust: "Shorts it.. shorts it.. shorts it.. SHORTS IT.. SHORTS IT.. SHORTS IT SHORTS IT SHORTSITSHORTSITSHORTSITSHORTSIT RUSSELL FROM THE PAINT OHHH BABY THAT IS MAGNIFICENT!"

Probably a job for Sharks on a Plane.
 
Flawed Genius said:
For specific phrases, before the game begins, the group nominates a (as Partridge noted) "particularly vicious spirit", ie absinthe, to be "shotted" when Dwayne rolls out "from the paint" or any other nominated phrase. It must be terribly annoying though, can't be used for "shorts it" or "wildest dreams" or etc.
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on the canvas!
 

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Flawed Genius said:
During foreplay: "That could be the firestarter! Can he find the clitoris? You bet he can! Only in your wildest dreams!"

After every thrust: "Shorts it.. shorts it.. shorts it.. SHORTS IT.. SHORTS IT.. SHORTS IT SHORTS IT SHORTSITSHORTSITSHORTSITSHORTSIT RUSSELL FROM THE PAINT OHHH BABY THAT IS MAGNIFICENT!"

Probably a job for Sharks on a Plane.
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Outstanding. :thumbsu:

Somewhat HORRENDOUS! imagery, but outstanding nonetheless...
 
Imagine if his partner wanted to go a second round and had to get "Dwayne's Pipe" up and running again. He'd be lying there while she goes about her business:

"Gives it some life! From little things, big things grow!"
 
Flawed Genius said:
Imagine if his partner wanted to go a second round and had to get "Dwayne's Pipe" up and running again. He'd be lying there while she goes about her business:

"Gives it some life! From little things, big things grow!"
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About ten minutes later........

Dwayne: "He's got his mojo back, amazing!"
 
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