Banter 2021 Off-Topic Chat Thread

[Spazz Cat]

Cause the pilot was a carrot

 

[Spazz Cat]

Running low now

 

[Spazz Cat]

Actually a good one. Why did the Irishman stick a tampon behind his ear?

 

[Shell]

Actually a good one. Why did the Irishman stick a tampon behind his ear?

Cause his ears were bleeding?

 

[Shell]

I also dont get the pilot carrot one

 

[Spazz Cat]

I also dont get the pilot carrot one

Yeah its just f**king stupid

 

[cats_09]

Actually a good one. Why did the Irishman stick a tampon behind his ear?

Because he was told wearing one of these means you can go swimming, surfing blah blah blah

 

[Spazz Cat]

Cause his ears were bleeding?

Nah. Minus 8 bazillion points.
To remind him of the campaigner who stole his pencil

 

[Catsnlakers]

Running out of jokes that aren't too rude lol

The ruder the better lol

 

[Shell]

Who are the faster readers in the world?

 

[Spazz Cat]

Actually bizarrely someone told me a different vagina/ear joke the other night but probs a bit dirty.
But what are the odds of that?

 

[Spazz Cat]

Who are the faster readers in the world?

Ummmm. Librarians

 

[Shell]

Ummmm. Librarians

No minus infinity points

 

[Catsnlakers]

Who are the faster readers in the world?

Asians

 

[Shell]

9/11 victims- they got thru 89 stories in 7 seconds

 

[Spazz Cat]

No minus infinity points

Infinity? You can't do that

 

[Shell]

Asians

You are also incorrect

 

[Spazz Cat]

9/11 victims- they got thru 89 stories in 7 seconds

Haha excellent.

 

[Shell]

Infinity? You can't do that

I just did.

 

[Shell]

Why were the twin towers mad?

 

[Spazz Cat]

On reading/eyes.
There was a kid who was born with no eyelids so they decided to circumcise him and make eyelids out of it.
The mum goes You can't do that. He'll be cockeyed.
The dad goes Yeah but think of the foresight he'll have.

 

[winty]

In America how do they circumcise Hill billies?

On a similar note, a hillbilly goes to his doctor and asks for a vasectomy. The doc says to him "Hey, you can do them yourself nowadays!"

"Really?" says the hillbilly. "How do I do that?"

"It's easy" says the doc. "All you need to do is sit outside cross legged, light a firecracker, put it in a tin can and count to ten."

"How does that work?" asks the hillbilly.

"Trust me" says the doctor.

The hillbilly goes home, sits in the backyard, lights a firecracker, puts it in a tin can and starts counting. "1...2...3...4...5" then puts the tin can between his legs and starts counting on the fingers on his other hand...

 

[Spazz Cat]

Why were the twin towers mad?

Cause Osama crashed their party?

 

[Shell]

Cause Osama crashed their party?

10 points.

Nah because they ordered pizzas with the lot, but instead all they got were two plains.

 

[Shell]

What happens when you call the suicide hotline in Afghanistan?