Media The Toxic Warrior

[Tonga Bob]

Welcome to Sin City in season 19 – a small town in Sweet, terrorised by criminals. The town’s corrupt mayor okeydoke7 sits idly by, while muggers, robbers and teenage punks victimise helpless citizens.



Among the residents of Sin City is Jessica, a nerdy yet ridiculously good looking janitor at the local strip club who loves nothing more than staring pensively into the distance. That is, until he becomes The toxic Warrior! A gang of thugs devise a cruel hoax that goes horribly wrong as toxic is thrown through a third story window into a vat of hazardous toxic waste. However, an unexpected metamorphosis takes place.

As the chemicals take hold of his body, toxic finishes his two season stint at the Swamprats, makes his way to Coney Island and turns into The Toxic Warrior, doer of good, and brutal mauler of evil! Affectionately known as... well toxic, our new hero is a seven-foot mutant freak with superhuman strength and a heart as big as the Whore Tree. He's out to save Coney Island, end global warming, and woo the blind librarian in town. He started with an absolute bang in his first season with the Warriors, being the runner-up in the Mobbs Medal behind teammate Freofalcon (the second time in three seasons no less) along with winning an All-SFA jumper and an award formerly known as the TFLUA. Since then toxic has found his groove at Van Cortlandt Park... which looks a lot like a hole, about a metre up the trunk of the Whore Tree. And this week, this heart and soul Wazza plays his 150th game for Coney Island and as a result becomes the 14th person to earn Life Membership of the Warriors!



Let's take a look at toxic's qareer by the numbers (courtesy of Hate and his marvellous inventions):

Spoiler: toxic's numbers

Games: 183* (CIW 149*, SCS 34)
Hitouts: 185
Kicks: 1127
Marks: 403
Handballs: 1005
Disposals: 2132
Tackles: 318
Frees For: 160
Frees Against: 140
Goals: 164
Behinds: 91
Dream Team Points: 8872

Debut: Sin City Swamprats - Season 19, Round 1
Warriors Debut: Season 21, Round 1
Highest HitOuts: 20 - Season 19, Round 11 - (Sin City Swamprats) vs. Las Vegas Bears
Highest Kicks: 18 - Season 21, Round 07 - Las Vegas Bears vs. (Coney Island Warriors)
Highest Marks: 10 - Season 23, Round 07 - (Coney Island Warriors) vs. Gold City Royals
Highest Handballs: 18 - x2 occasions
Highest Tackles: 11 - x2 occasions
Highest Disposals: 31 - Season 21, Round 11 - (Coney Island Warriors) vs. Roys FFC
20+ Disposals: x28 occasions
Highest DreamTeam Points: 129 - Season 19, Round 04 - (Sin City Swamprats) vs. Coney Island Warriors
100+ DreamTeam Points: x11 occasions
Highest Goals: 6 - x2 occasions
5+ Goals: x8 occasions

1 x All-SFA guernsey (Season 21)
1 x AFKATFLUA-Tiger Award (Season 21)
2 x Mobbs Medal Runner Up (Seasons 19 & 21)
4th in the Fred Medal (Season 20)
Coney Island Warriors Life Membership
Maybe a best goal kicker award in season 20 & best rookie award in season 19 at the Swamprats but they don't like to keep records of such things.

So toxic on behalf of everyone at Coney Island I wish you the mazelest of tovs brother as you join an elite group of people in an elite club on an imaginary online qootball association.

Get around him Sweet!

​

 

[Dinsdale]

The Toxic Warrior, doer of good, and brutal mauler of evil!

This is why I love toxic for all the good done in the universe

 

[spudmaster]

Congratulations on life membership toxic. Let's celebrate by finally letting me into the bed in your AV hey?
#teaser

 

[toxic]

Oops - old habits

 

[Jabba73]

150 games is Life Membership?

Has there ever been a player NOT get it?

 

[TheInjuryFactory]

Congrats tox and welcome to the life membership club brother. Been an absolute ripper since returning the club, a proper old school Wazza back in the fold. Love it.

 

[TheInjuryFactory]

150 games is Life Membership?

Has there ever been a player NOT get it?

Aren't you the 50 game milestone thread guy?

 

[Ocha905]

Congratulations toxic on 150 games!

Here's to getting a win for you on the eve of a hopefully triumphant finals series just like your foopy club.

 

[Freofalcon]

Congrats toxic

Owner of my favourite avatar on BF

 

[Dinsdale]

150 games is Life Membership?

Has there ever been a player NOT get it?

Why can't you say something nice you pile of fetid dingo kidneys.

 

[Jabba73]

Aren't you the 50 game milestone thread guy?

Yes. We need to celebrate the newbies making it that far as way too many don’t.

Not sure what that has to do with giving LM at 150 games, which ironically is only 3 times longer than what you consider too insignificant to even acknowledge.

 

[Tonga Bob]

Yes. We need to celebrate the newbies making it that far as way too many don’t.

Not sure what that has to do with giving LM at 150 games, which ironically is only 3 times longer than what you consider too insignificant to even acknowledge.

Hi Jabba, Bob here. Have you said congratulations to toxic yet?

 

[Wosh]

Some very fond memories of playing with toxic back in the day, very funny poster and about as Wazza as you can get. Congrats on Life Membership, part of Coney Island history now

 

[Jabba73]

Why can't you say something nice you pile of fetid dingo kidneys.

Hi Jabba, Bob here. Have you said congratulations to toxic yet?

If I did either of those things, I would not be paying proper tribute to his username ...

 

[Dinsdale]

If I did either of those things, I would not be paying proper tribute to his username ...

Ok you're in the left column "Flogs"

 

[Jabba73]

you pile of fetid dingo kidneys.

Ok you're in the left column "Flogs"

See?

You are being very toxic, the perfect tribute.

 

[NaturalDisaster]

Probably my favourite <10 average posts poster in the SFA.

 

[Dinsdale]

Probably my favourite <10 average posts poster in the SFA.

Not everyone is a spammer like you m7

 

[TheInjuryFactory]

Has there ever been a player NOT get it?

Yeah. Every Bombers rookie since S24.

Thanks again Hate!

 

[Braklet]

Congrats on your big old thing, toxic!

Oh, and on this Warrior life sentence thing, too.

 

[Jabba73]

Yeah. Every Bombers rookie since S24.

Thanks again Hate!

Would certainly hope not, why would the Warriors make our rookies Life Members?