Official Team Thread West Coast Wonders S30 Team Thread - Oderint dum metuant - Bonz S30 BnF winner

[ClarkeM]

Rd 4 v Gumbies FFC by SSwans2011

Round 4 vs. Gumbies
The highlight of this week came early, as the entirety of the S21 Grand Final was posted in the match thread. In that epic encounter, the Wonders defeated the Gumbies, taking home the Premiership, and capping off one of the greatest finals runs in SFA history.

Key players: The S20 rookie crop led from the front, as Kangaroos4eva received BOG honours, while haydo was also super important. craffles booted 4, and ClarkeM clutched it up to boot the sealer from outside fifty.

#firsttosix baby!

Best Posters Per Barrybran
3 SSwans2011
2 ClarkeM
1 Jack The Godfather

Spoiler: Votes

Round 4 v Gumbies
17 - Elmer_Judd
16 - Coopers
14 - Bonz
6 - JT_the_Man
3 - BallaratBulldog
2 - Cactus_
1 - jezzajay
1 - Sab22

 

[Dingster]

You’ve got this JT_the_Man

 

[ClarkeM]

Rd 5 v Baghdad Bombers by SweetD

Round 5 - Baghdad Bombers
Where do you even begin with the bombers? Antagonistic, Arrogant Dogpilers, when you see that thread against the Bombers you grimace, brace yourself, and charge headfirst into the unknown.

A sh*t 1-3 start to the season had us reeling, was this really going to be another sh*t fit bottom of the ladder year? Or was it just a slow start like the previous season. (Spoiler alert, it was the sh*t fit)

After getting to a 3 goal lead after the first, we all decided to have a group tug sesh over winning a quarter, tiring us all out, leaving the Bombers to do what Bombers do best. Run rampant and overwhelm. Another loss. Some spud kicked 4.4 with 8 kicks and nothing else, how does that even happen? Who was on him? Why didn’t we sack them?

In positive news WaynesWorld19 got coup’d or some sh*t, so I think we were the moral victors this week at the very least.

Key players:
AngryRanga, His first foray into the midfield was a good’un, showed the old farts how things are done with his partner in crime Elmer_Judd. 61 touches, 12 marks and 4 “man these guys are getting pretty close” moments between them.

Sab22: 5 goals, that's what you need your man to do considering no one else seemed to be able to kick them.

SweetD: I hate putting myself here but fu** I was good this game.

Best Posters per cadsky
3. Grand Uncle Horace - although he can be confusing and often appears to wander off on his own tangent, uncle horrie was always around a happy to banter with any of our posters.

2. ClarkeM - I really enjoyed your voice messages earlier week. It offered something different and engaging for our mob. Its a shame your posting dropped off later in the week.

1. SSwans2011 - winner this week is swanny. showed up late but put in a very solid second half of the week. Easily stood his ground and took everything our mob threw at him. His experience showed and he appeares to me an essential wonders player to help lead a rebuild.

Spoiler: Votes

20 - AngryRanga
14 - Elmer_Judd
14 - SweetD
6 - ClarkeM
5 - Sab22
1 - Bonz

 

[ClarkeM]

ROUND 5
60 - Elmer_Judd
42 - ClarkeM
37 - Bonz
28 - jezzajay
23 - SweetD
20 - AngryRanga
20 - Sab22
18 - Jack The Godfather
16 - Coopers
11 - SSwans2011
10 - JT_the_Man
7 - Wojcinski
3 - BallaratBulldog
2 - Cactus_
2 - Uncle_Leo
1 - Crusty Undies
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[ClarkeM]

Rd 6 v Gold City Royals by ClarkeM

Rd 6 v Gold City Royals
The Wonders were well and truly off to an awful start as seems to always be the case with us. There's just something about sh*t starts and late surges that feels right to us although, it doesn't seem to work out that well every season.
The Royals were a tough opponent and by Round 6, had solidified themselves as a Premiership contender with one of the strongest backlines in the league.
It was always going to be a hard slog to get the win in this game.

News around the world on Game Day:
* Authentic wins Kentucky Derby with no fans in the stands due to the Coronavirus Pandemic

Game Analysis:
Q1: High scoring first quarter, Royals kicked 7 goals, Wonders kicked 6.
Q2: Still within the mark by the half-time break, Early goal to Elmer_Judd and Cactus_ got us into an early lead we were never going to be able to hold.
Q3: KBLT and Sab22 rose up in the Premiership Quarter to put the Wonders in front by 14 points going into the last break.
Q4: Despite our efforts to hold on and a late goal from Cactus_, we fell short by the most gruelling of margins, 1 point.

Key players:
Elmer_Judd had 30 disposals, 6 marks and a goal in a dominant display
Cactus_ kicked 4 goals, all of them crucial
Bonz 31 disposals, 14 hitouts and 6 tackles was hot in the middle of the ground too

Best Posters per Smartys Power
3. ClarkeM
2. Grand Uncle Horace
1. AngryRanga

Spoiler: Votes

17 - Bonz
15 - ClarkeM
10 - Cactus_
10 - SweetD
8 - Elmer_Judd

 

[ClarkeM]

Captains Award by ClarkeM

Winner - Haydo

It's been a long time since I've had to give out such an award and it did take me a while there to think what I look for as a standing-in captain, when we're heading towards the bottom of the ladder and with players dropping like flies around us.

What I look for is character. The character to be composed in the heat, understand the situation and offer to help in any way possible.

haydo, since returning home, has been nothing short of an asset to the West Coast Wonders - his home, his comfort-zone.

Thank you haydo for your willingness to assist myself and the LG with our handling of this season, your positive attitude in the threads even when things aren't going to plan on the scoreboard and lastly, to your teammates. It brings a little flutter to the heart when I think back to that PM you sent me requesting a trade home. I may have thought it was a joke, or a tease at least but we facilitated it thanks to philreich and his crew gracefully. Welcome home son.

The Season 30 Captain's Award, haydo.

 

[SSwans2011]

Captains Award by ClarkeM

Winner - Haydo

It's been a long time since I've had to give out such an award and it did take me a while there to think what I look for as a standing-in captain, when we're heading towards the bottom of the ladder and with players dropping like flies around us.

What I look for is character. The character to be composed in the heat, understand the situation and offer to help in any way possible.

haydo, since returning home, has been nothing short of an asset to the West Coast Wonders - his home, his comfort-zone.

Thank you haydo for your willingness to assist myself and the LG with our handling of this season, your positive attitude in the threads even when things aren't going to plan on the scoreboard and lastly, to your teammates. It brings a little flutter to the heart when I think back to that PM you sent me requesting a trade home. I may have thought it was a joke, or a tease at least but we facilitated it thanks to philreich and his crew gracefully. Welcome home son.

The Season 30 Captain's Award, haydo.

Champion, haydo!

 

[SweetD]

Welcome back haydo king

 

[ClarkeM]

Rd 7 v Sin City Swamprats by ClarkeM

Rd 7 v Sin City Swamprats
The season was starting to look pretty bleak for us sitting equal bottom of the ladder with just one win and 5 losses.

Going up against a contending team in the Swamprats who have been dominant for so long now, it wasn't going to be an easy day out for us.

News around the world on Game Day:
* Former U.K. prime ministers publish joint letter criticizing government's plan to breach Brexit deal

Game Analysis:
It was a tale of two halves. On one half, we're going up against one of the strongest sides in the league, and on the other half, we were one of the worst-performing sides in the league.

So what do you think was going to happen?

Like, seriously. It's a shitshow!

Q1: Held our own, 3 goals of our own to match their 3 goals.
Q2: Sab22 boots a couple of goals and we're still in it, only down by two points at the main break.
Q3: The gates were starting to open for the Swamprats and we seemed to just keeping turning the qooty over.
Q4: I'm abstaining from analysing this quarter apart from saying the Swamprats royally ****ed us.

Key players:
Sab22 kicked 4 goals, which was good for us given we were pathetic.
Crusty Undies showed up though, he had 24 disposals, 6 marks and a goal - nice work Crusty
AngryRanga settled in nicely with his 18 disposals and 5 tackles in the guts

Best Posters per SarahSmiles
3. SweetD - Few of his posts actually made me laugh out loud and good at engaging with people
2. ClarkeM - You're a good egg and were pretty funny this week too
1. SSwans2011 - Great to have him join later in the week, love his FIGJAM persona and he has a very cute dog

Spoiler: Votes

16 - Crusty Undies
14 - Sab22
12 - Cactus_
12 - AngryRanga
3 - PerfectFooty
3 - SweetD

 

[ClarkeM]

Rd 8 v Fighting Furies by Bonz

Round 8: Fighting Furies vs West Coast Wonders
SSwans2011 Has way too much time on his hands so he tells the Furies to Fcuk themselves and put a hole in their faces.


I think everyone agrees, out match threads are always more fun when SSwans2011 is up and about and giving literal s**t to the opposition. Also re-reading his posts I think he truly does aspire to do nothing but swear in our match threads

Some of his highlights this week.

(Reposting this one twice so SSwans2011 can punch two holes in their face)

Just hopefully moving forward in the future SSwans2011 doesn’t blow his load too early like the below post. (I am now personally holding him responsible for our lack of success post haydo).

View attachment 1014048

Apart from SSwans2011 getting bored/ Angry/ maybe missing a psychologist appointment our activity in the thread was fantastic, With Clarkey getting his usual troll amount of posts, Grand Uncle Horace creating 81 posts with literally none of them making any sense at all, SweetD contributing 48 times and myself hitting the mark on 45 occasions with 26 of these being either new or reused poor quality photoshops.

I could talk about the game but we all know the sim hates us so why go there?


Best Posters per Ned_Flanders
3) SSwans2011
2) ClarkeM
1) Grand Uncle Horace

Spoiler: Votes

18 - SweetD
16 - ClarkeM
9 - Elmer_Judd
8 - SSwans2011
5 - Sab22
4 - dogs105

 

[haydo]

Ahhhh apparently technology is s**t and I've tapped out from the Discord lol. All G though, the wife is snooping around

 

[ClarkeM]

Rd 9 v Roys FFC by SSwans2011

Round 9 vs Roys
The average age on the West Coast soared as the Wonders continued to plummet to lows not experienced since ten seasons prior when club culture and unity was fractured by the infamous tomato sauce storage debate. This anonymous B&F writer still thinks @Golumless’ opinions on the matter are the sole reason the Wonders haven’t won a flag since that era.

At this point, we’d lost 5 on the trot, but optimism and team morale was at an all-time high.



On the bright side, we had haydo back, and we were still a chance at finals if we won the remaining matches.

Match Analysis
The sim appeared to have a sense of occasion to celebrate haydo’s first official full week back at the club, despite hadyo being reportedly “buggered” running through the banner, as he continued to reacclimatise to @JT_the_Man’s pre-game traditions.

Q1: Our forwards wreaked havoc, with skipper Sab22 leading from the front, booting 3, and we headed into quarter time with a 5-goal lead, and confidence we would only lose by a few goals this time.
Q2: Things evened up a bit in the second quarter after a handful of the Roys were resuscitated during the break. Crusty Undies was busy, and so were the defenders, as they strategically chipped the ball amongst one another until the Roys would cause a turnover and spray their chances. This would prove an inspired decision from a backline that had been under fire this season, as this appeared to drain the Roys of their enthusiasm. Wonders up by 3 goals.
Q3: The match tightened up in the third, as each side went goal-for-goal. Old sexy farts ClarkeM and croweater 41 hit the scoreboard to prevent the Roys from eating into the half-time deficit.
Q4: This season, this is typically where we would fade-out. However, Elmer_Judd and AngryRanga, looking to get on top in the midfield, leaked to the Roys that re-runs of MASH were being aired in the Colosseum club house, allowing Sab to boot another 3, and the Wonders to run over the top of the Roys and ACTUALLY WIN A ******* GAME FOR ONCE YOU fu**IN RIPPERRRRRR

Key Players
Sab led from the front, finishing with 7 goals, his biggest haul for the season, while Bonz, ClarkeM, and haydo were busy in the midfield. Cactus_ held opposition full forward Mooch goalless in a dominant display, and newcomer J_Chadwick and veteran dogs105 bobbed up with big performances. Finally there’s gonna be some ******* competition for votes.


Best Posters per Mooch
3. ClarkeM. Ruled the thread with an unbeatable mix of drunken humour and Youtube clips.
2. SSwans2011. Pretends to love the Wonders more than anything. But his love of techno has now been revealed.
1. SweetD. Some great work by the rookie. Plays the game right but not afraid to get stuck in.

Spoiler: Votes

15 - ClarkeM
14 - Sab22
13 - Bonz
8 - J_Chadwick
3 - dogs105
3 - SweetD
2 - haydo
1 - JT_the_Man
1 - Grand Uncle Horace

 

[ClarkeM]

Rookie of the Year by Bonz

Rookie of the year!

And in the easiest decision the SFA has ever had (Except for the upcoming decision to name me S30 All SFA Ruckman) our rookie of the year award goes to Elmer_Judd

I know you didn't get your wish to join the Vampires, but honestly I feel as if you are better off simply because you didn't have to join a team with a shitty name like the Vampires (Seriously Millky couldn't you have thought of anything better?)

Honestly though The SFA's loss in an expansion team was our gain as you have been a regular in our match threads throughout our entire season and I am yet to figure out if there is a single sport you don't actually follow (You have managed to mention the NBA, International Soccer, EPL, A-League (Although lost some respect for you when I found out you supported City), along with permanently death riding the Swamprats)

Reference for deathriding the Swampies

And it wouldn't be a rookie of the year award without including that one moment where you made me spray coffee all over the table.

 

[haydo]

Congrats Elmer_Judd amazing rookie season. I didn't know you were a Vampire original? Cheers Millky95

 

[ClarkeM]

Rd 10 v East Side Hawks by SweetD

Round 10 - East Side Hawks

I like the Hawks, they’re like a little cousin, you wanna play with them a bit before you get bored and they become annoying and you can just fu** em off with whoever owns them.

Coming into this game was an 11th vs 12th extravaganza, there was more value in watching My Kitchen Rules than this tripe...

..Is what I would say if this wasn’t one of the most exciting games of the year. Neck and Neck almost all game, barely a goal between it, a shootout and with 3 minutes remaining it was 120 a piece.

That is until ******* Clarkey walks the ball over the line, and then we prance around like idiots like we were intentionally throwing the game, letting them score another. 2 points. 2 ******* points.

I think AngryRanga puts it best



Just f’ed up guys, hold onto the ball next time.

Key Players

AngryRanga with a herculean effort. 23 touches and 2 goals 3, tried to drag this sorry mob right over the line.

J_Chadwick, another rookie with something to prove, obviously the existential dread of being a Wonders player had yet to set in, 20 touches and 2 goals

ClarkeM. I have many words for his performance this game but I’ll leave you with just one. Dickhead.

Best Posters Per Golumless
3. SSwans2011
I don't think this one will surprise anyone. SSwans has been one of my favourite posters in the SFA since I joined the league and any week where he's up and about is a treat to me.

2. SweetD
Yeah, Wonders have one here with SweetD. Was very good value throughout the thread.

1. AngryRanga
AR gets a pity vote from me because of the comment that his parents forced him into being a St.Kilda supporter. That is child abuse, and quite possibly a war crime.

Spoiler: Votes

20 - AngryRanga
12 - Elmer_Judd
10 - BallaratBulldog
7 - Sab22
5 - J_Chadwick
4 - Bonz
2 - SSwans2011

 

[SSwans2011]

Good s**t, Elmer_Judd - fantastic rookie season.

 

[Elmer_Judd]

Congrats Elmer_Judd amazing rookie season. I didn't know you were a Vampire original? Cheers Millky95

Thanks Buddy. Appreciate it

 

[ClarkeM]

ROUND 10
89 - Elmer_Judd
88 - ClarkeM
71 - Bonz
60 - Sab22
57 - SweetD
52 - AngryRanga
28 - jezzajay
24 - Cactus_
21 - SSwans2011
18 - Jack the Godfather
17 - Crusty Undies
16 - Coopers
13 - BallaratBulldog
13 - J_Chadwick
11 - JT_the_Man
7 - Wojcinski
7 - dogs105
3 - PerfectFooty
2 - Uncle_Leo
2 - haydo
1 - Grand Uncle Horace
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[haydo]

Could we see a rookie win the B&F? Stranger things (is a pretty ******* decent TV show) have happened

 

[SSwans2011]

ROUND 10
89 - Elmer_Judd
88 - ClarkeM
71 - Bonz
60 - Sab22
57 - SweetD
52 - AngryRanga
28 - jezzajay
24 - Cactus_
21 - SSwans2011
18 - Jack the Godfather
17 - Crusty Undies
16 - Coopers
13 - BallaratBulldog
13 - J_Chadwick
11 - JT_the_Man
7 - Wojcinski
7 - dogs105
3 - PerfectFooty
2 - Uncle_Leo
2 - haydo
1 - Grand Uncle Horace
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FMD this is about the highest I've been in a B&F count this far in. I reckon I'm on here, gents.

 

[SweetD]

I should've voted for myself more *

 

[Elmer_Judd]

Rookie of the Year by Bonz

Rookie of the year!

And in the easiest decision the SFA has ever had (Except for the upcoming decision to name me S30 All SFA Ruckman) our rookie of the year award goes to Elmer_Judd

I know you didn't get your wish to join the Vampires, but honestly I feel as if you are better off simply because you didn't have to join a team with a shitty name like the Vampires (Seriously Millky couldn't you have thought of anything better?)

Honestly though The SFA's loss in an expansion team was our gain as you have been a regular in our match threads throughout our entire season and I am yet to figure out if there is a single sport you don't actually follow (You have managed to mention the NBA, International Soccer, EPL, A-League (Although lost some respect for you when I found out you supported City), along with permanently death riding the Swamprats)

Reference for deathriding the Swampies

And it wouldn't be a rookie of the year award without including that one moment where you made me spray coffee all over the table.

Really surprised, delighted and thrilled to win this award in such a great team of lads.

I know we didn't have the greatest season with regards to wins and losses, but I wouldn't swap it for the world.

Looking forward to coming back for Season 31 with the Wonders, and I will up my game and banter next season (esp against the Swampies and Gumbies lol)

Cheers to everyone who made me feel so welcome here

 

[ClarkeM]

Rd 11 v Gumbies FFC by ClarkeM

Rd 11 v Gumbies FFC
An old foe, the Gumbies have always been known as the s**t-lickers at the bottom of the Sweet FA. But somehow, in the midst of Season 30, they had found some unexpected form and were on a winning streak on their way to a finals berth.

It's been a long time since the Gumbies were ever relevant and so we would like to wish them all of the best in the Season 30 finals (should that be on the horizon as we commence our post-season trip to Bangkok).

News around the world on Game Day:
* Trump holds 1st public appearance since COVID-19 diagnosis at White House

Game Analysis:


Q1: Well s**t, yeah not bad Wonders although while you dominated the quarter, you let them get back into it towards the end.
Q2: Looks like we went home for the quarter. Skip to the next one.
Q3: Well well well, a lead that was once 41 points was now just 17 points.
Q4: Here's where it gets ridiculous. Goals for goals. Sab22 just standing tall in the goal-square, we get out to a 7 point lead and then we looked at our guernseys and realised "WE ARE THE WONDERS!" so we decided to lose this game in the dying moments.

Key players:
Sab22 8 goals which is a mighty haul in itself.
SweetD 34 disposals, 2 goals and 4 wristies - very impressive performance
croweater 41 donut performance, all 0's... conveniently shaped like a ring too. Maybe this is where he got the idea?

Best Posters per Barrybran
3 Bonz
2 ClarkeM
1 Grand Uncle Horace

Spoiler: Votes

19 - Sab22
17 - SweetD
11 - BallaratBulldog
7 - Bonz
5 - ClarkeM
1 - KBLT

 

[ClarkeM]

Rd 12 v Dragons by ClarkeM

Rd 12 v Dragons FFC
Dragons v the Wonders, what a beautiful sight,
Two rich clubs that have been around for seasons long,
We're set here for a beautiful Sweet FA fight,
In a real competition and not that shitshow Tittybong,

Who will win, who will come out on top?
The Wonders are near the bottom, looking for hope,
We were no real chance but we'll take the slop,
Time to rebuild and review the club's scope,

But alas this game was not to be ours in the end,
We lost convincingly to the Dragons who left us sore,
Post-game we soon returned to become friends,
They may have won the battle but also too the war,

For the ill-informed:
Wonders is our name,
Wonders lost this game,
Dragons won this one,
Go * someone...

News around the world on Game Day:
* Tampa Bay Rays clinch World Series spot

Game Analysis:

Q1: no
Q2:
Q3:
Q4:

Key players:
Bonz 21 hitouts, 17 disposals which wasn't too bad at all plus 9 tackles.
SweetD 24 disposals, 8 marks, 1 goal

Best Posters per Strigoi
3 votes - Bonz
2 votes - AngryRanga
1 vote - SweetD

Spoiler: Votes

19 - Bonz
15 - haydo
14 - SweetD
5 - Grand Uncle Horace
4 - J_Chadwick
2 - AngryRanga
1 - Sab22

 

[ClarkeM]

ROUND 12
97 - Bonz
93 - ClarkeM
89 - Elmer_Judd
88 - SweetD
80 - Sab22
54 - AngryRanga
28 - jezzajay
24 - Cactus_
24 - BallaratBulldog
21 - SSwans2011
18 - Jack The Godfather
17 - Crusty Undies
17 - J_Chadwick
17 - haydo
16 - Coopers
11 - JT_the_Man
7 - Wojcinski
7 - dogs105
6 - Grand Uncle Horace
3 - PerfectFooty
2 - Uncle_Leo
1 - KBLT
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