Society/Culture What makes a man a man?

[owen87]

The rise of the beta male.

Cmon mate. If you're going to vehemently argue that only science should be discussed, don't link to 20 minute YouTube opinion videos when the argument suits you.

 

[Snake_Baker]

Cmon mate. If you're going to vehemently argue that only science should be discussed, don't link to 20 minute YouTube opinion videos when the argument suits you.

I didn;t think I had to.

You can try & refute it if you like, and I will bury you in an avalanche of papers..

 

[owen87]

I didn;t think I had to.

You can try & refute it if you like, and I will bury you in an avalanche of papers..

At least the avalanche of papers would show you're internally consistent. You dismiss YouTube opinion videos when it doesn't suit you, but when it suits your argument you're all for them.

 

[Snake_Baker]

At least the avalanche of papers would show you're internally consistent. You dismiss YouTube opinion videos when it doesn't suit you, but when it suits your argument you're all for them.

I promote the one's that are truthful and dismiss the one's that aren't.

 

[owen87]

I promote the one's that are truthful and dismiss the one's that aren't.

Of course you do.

You also realise almost no one is watching a random 20 minute video right? So whatever point you're trying to make with it, is lost.

 

[footyfan1978]

Chin music

 

[Pessimistic]

The rise of the beta male.

I can feel it draining away daily

 

[Pessimistic]

When women earn more than their male partners, domestic violence risk goes up 35 per cent

Ground-breaking Australian research also shows as soon as women earn more than half a couple’s income they face a 20 per cent increase in the chance of suffering from emotional abuse.

www.smh.com.au

Mrs pessimistic has always earned more than Mr, sometimes substantially.

I do occasionally have to remind her when she’s devaluing my worth that she’s displaying the toxic chauvinism she’d supposed to hate in males

So no, I don’t believe all the mental abuse goes one way

 

[the_interloper]

When women earn more than their male partners, domestic violence risk goes up 35 per cent

Ground-breaking Australian research also shows as soon as women earn more than half a couple’s income they face a 20 per cent increase in the chance of suffering from emotional abuse.

www.smh.com.au

Mrs pessimistic has always earned more than Mr, sometimes substantially.

I do occasionally have to remind her when she’s devaluing my worth that she’s displaying the toxic chauvinism she’d supposed to hate in males

So no, I don’t believe all the mental abuse goes one way

That's interesting. I guess blokes who can't get a job (or a good job) can spiral into depression, substance abuse etc, probably factors which contribute to DV. I don't believe it would affect me if my wife earnt more, right now I think it would be great because I earn decent enough dough (8 figures like everyone on the internet of course).

 

[Power Raid]

That's interesting. I guess blokes who can't get a job (or a good job) can spiral into depression, substance abuse etc, probably factors which contribute to DV. I don't believe it would affect me if my wife earnt more, right now I think it would be great because I earn decent enough dough (8 figures like everyone on the internet of course).

My sister works in social welfare and her comment on the issue is:

Black African Muslim family arrive in Australia. Both are limited to uber, cleaning jobs and other blue collar jobs due to language skills and skill recognition.

However females are hired more often than males from this group, perhaps due to racism multiplied by sexism.

The culture in this category of people, is the male is the boss of the house back in their homeland. However here in Oz, for them this is completely flipped with the woman having an income and greater levels of integration into the community through school parenting friendships, mothers groups and work associations.

This results in frustration and "giving her one", which once acceptable in Australia under law, may well be still acceptable in their culture.

So perhaps we aren't just looking at a $ issue but a bigger issue of integration.

 

[the_interloper]

My sister works in social welfare and her comment on the issue is:

Black African Muslim family arrive in Australia. Both are limited to uber, cleaning jobs and other blue collar jobs due to language skills and skill recognition.

However females are hired more often than males from this group, perhaps due to racism multiplied by sexism.

The culture in this category of people, is the male is the boss of the house back in their homeland. However here in Oz, for them this is completely flipped with the woman having an income and greater levels of integration into the community through school parenting friendships, mothers groups and work associations.

This results in frustration and "giving her one", which once acceptable in Australia under law, may well be still acceptable in their culture.

So perhaps we aren't just looking at a $ issue but a bigger issue of integration.

This makes a lot of sense and could certainly be part of the problem, though I feel that any study which concluded integration being an issue would be not publicised.

 

[Toump Ass]

Can't get more manly than using the words "cuck" or "beta" in a sentence IMO.

A few others:
Owning a movie with Will Smith in it on Blu Ray or DVD (preferably both)
Taking up more space on public transport than required.
Laughing at your own jokes whenever you're at the pub.
Doubling your salary when talking to plebs on internet forums.
Hanging sh*t on people you don't like.
Bundaberg Rum.
Punching Winnie Reds.
Hanging sh*t on people you do like.
Punching someone in the face because they looked at you funny (aka "defending yourself").
And even if they didn't.
Owning a pocket square and knowing the appropriate time and place to wear it.
Shooting things (may have mentioned this one before).

I'll brb once I think of a few more.

 

[utility]

Owning a movie with Will Smith in it on Blu Ray or DVD (preferably both)

I respectfully disagree.

 

[Pessimistic]

My sister works in social welfare and her comment on the issue is:

Black African Muslim family arrive in Australia. Both are limited to uber, cleaning jobs and other blue collar jobs due to language skills and skill recognition.

However females are hired more often than males from this group, perhaps due to racism multiplied by sexism.

The culture in this category of people, is the male is the boss of the house back in their homeland. However here in Oz, for them this is completely flipped with the woman having an income and greater levels of integration into the community through school parenting friendships, mothers groups and work associations.

This results in frustration and "giving her one", which once acceptable in Australia under law, may well be still acceptable in their culture.

So perhaps we aren't just looking at a $ issue but a bigger issue of integration.

survey didn’t seem to highlight socioeconomic groups.
I would suggest among female high achievers, even younger, an expectation of a partner at least as high achieving as them, the attitude carries over and will take a while to work through society. I don’t think it’s as simple as’ the guys can’t handle it’

both partners may be hard coded to be uncomfortable in the situation. On a logical level, it shouldn’t matter, but the dissatisfaction and conflict emotions are around, there may be a return to base instinct.

of course the male partner is often significantly physically stronger

 

[MarcMaverick]

I remember the limbo club discussed peeing in the shower and one guy said a girlfriend suggested a shower together, then took a whiz while they were both in there.

Ah the limbo club (the bots are sure to find these words)

Unfortunately the LC is incredibly sterile these days

 

[Boston tiger]

Takes the bins out .. mows the lawns .. and deals with any burglars.

 

[FRUMPY]

Takes the bins out .. mows the lawns .. and deals with any leftover burgers.

Sent from my CPH2005 using Tapatalk

 

[Pessimistic]

Eats food toddlers reject thus becoming dad bod and not so attractive to others

 

[Goosecat]

 

[Leeda]

Seriously do we need a 'thread' which is an ostensibly female thing ie sewing to establish what a man is?
I make no sense to those who don[t 'read' me.. but it is not a female/male thing...

I should and will say that it is a sense of caring for the family, the woman/man.. or even that someone 'needs' them..

shall add more when I gauge the attitude of the room

 

[Brunswick Trap King]

My wife wants to wash the bed linen every week. I think doing it once a year is sufficient.

Ew

 

[Seeds]

Ew

Yeah you just lost all your alpha male cred.

 

[Gough]

Yeah you just lost all your alpha male cred.

Nothing alpha about being a grot.

 

[Geelong_Sicko]

Nothing alpha about being a grot.

There's something about our animal selves, something that maybe lurks in the most ancient parts of our brains, that responds to smell and draws comfort from familiar ones within the living space we call home. Social mores change, and mostly for the better (the development of soap and then deoderants and anti-perspirants were a good thing IMO) but the primal need for familiar scent in the den stays strong in some of us.

 

[Johnny Bananas]

Masculine and feminine behaviours and attitudes are a different concept to what men and women actually are. You could say men more often show masculine behaviours and women more often show feminine behaviours, but every man has a level of femininity within them, and every woman has a level of masculinity. Indeed, it's probably necessary for women to bring out some of their masculinity if they want to succeed in areas like the business world, team sports or manual labour.

As to what good masculine behaviours and attitudes are, it's a hard thing to define exactly. I'd say it involves things like leading from the front, protecting others in the face of danger and providing for them. An example that comes to mind is from a period war novel I was reading, where a soldier appreciates that his sergeant goes charging into a field of mud yelling "follow me!", whereas other sergeants tend to sit back and direct their subordinates to go forth instead, which he thinks is because they don't want to get their boots dirty. To me, that's masculine. So is the willingness to throw yourself on a grenade to protect others.

I note I'm using a few military examples here despite having never served myself, probably because I view the military as an incredibly masculine institution, although their masculinity is not always good for themselves or others. There are of course many unhealthy masculine behaviours and attitudes too, that hopefully we'll move past as a society as we become more tolerant and respectful of others and focus more on treating mental health issues.

Being a man is really just about feeling comfortable identifying yourself as one and feeling comfortable when others call you one. But what causes people to feel that comfort? Maybe it's about how naturally masculine behaviours and attitudes come to you, compared to feminine ones. Or maybe it's just about whether one feels similar to the established societal constructs we have. I'm sure it's different for different people.