Roast Yelling at Clouds

[Next Waiting]

By the way, a split infinitive boldly goes into a bar...

Lord have mercy

 

[dogwatch]

So many clouds, so much yelling.

So few posters.

 

[Fossie 32]

I've given up worrying about the grammar, spelling, lack of paragraphs, etc in posts.

I still enjoy this though (malapropisms get a good workout on BF too!):

• An Oxford comma walks into a bar where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.

• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

• A question mark walks into a bar?

• A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

• A synonym strolls into a tavern.

• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

• A dyslexic walks into a bra.

• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.

An inappropriate apostrophe walk's into a bar

 

[Fossie 32]

No one's mentioned lemmings on here since what's-his-name!

 

[Fossie 32]

View attachment 1975592

C Norm De Guerre

 

[hutchy31]

Zero Sum Game posters on BF.

You know ... the ones who are all about winning the argument, not about having a constructive discussion.

Surely we don’t have anyone like that on this board?

Posters who try to batter others into submission, and then when that doesn’t work (because they think they have superior intellect but actually just have an ingrained position) then weaponize any laughing/haha response in an oh-so-clever sarcastic way that just reinforces what a monumental dick they are?

I can’t say I see many of them on BF now.

Although I do make use of the ignore function as soon as the above red flags announce themselves.

 

[BulldogMuscle]

I just want my team to be good

 

[Unnamed1]

I'm yelling at the clouds how Footscray supporters seem to have a solid grasp of the English language. Wtf is a gerund?!

 

[BallaratBulldog]

I'm yelling at the clouds how Footscray supporters seem to have a solid grasp of the English language. Wtf is a gerund?!

“Manure” - Doug Hawkins

 

[House_of_Dahl]

The big bang theory doesn't sit well with me.

 

[ScragCity]

If Jamarra Ugle-hagan and Bailey Smith

6

Bailey Smith

Age

23

Ht

185cm

Wt

86kg

Pos.

M/F

Career

Season

Last 5

D

18.3

5star

K

8.5

3star

HB

9.8

5star

M

2.3

2star

T

3.8

5star

CL

2.7

4star

D

19.8

5star

K

9.6

4star

HB

10.2

5star

M

1.8

2star

T

3.2

4star

CL

3.2

4star

D

14.8

4star

K

7.6

3star

HB

7.2

5star

M

2.0

3star

T

3.4

5star

CL

1.6

4star

leave then we are the new North Melbourne. We'll struggle to win a game in the next decade. Libba, Treloar and Jones are getting old and there's nothing coming up to replace them. Daniel and Macrae are cooked. Prepare yourselves for 10 years of bottom four.

 

[ScragCity]

Here's a hard truth: Tassie are closer to a flag than we are.

 

[ossie_21]

Could of. I could of gone to the game but I didn’t. It’s as bogan as anythink.
In case any don’t know, could’ve is short for could have!

*can’t’d

 

[Yesterday Dog]

AFL is too even and close games feel artificial

 

[maddog37]

People driving slowly in the right lane.

 

[maddog37]

The fact we have “trends” in umpiring directed by the AFL.

 

[Bulldog rick]

Why do some posters complain about players hair styles. Like 'he is a good player but he needs to get a hair cut'. WHY
Is there a bald headed brittle hair short back and sides sub group amongst us.

 

[Timewillcome]

I think there needs to be Lift/Elevator etiquette.
Fill the back corners first.
Do not enter a ground floor lift until all have exited the lift.
Do not press a button to open the door of a lift that’s door is already closing.
Do not go up or down a floor (use the stairs)

I could go on!

There is, its the damned kids today that don't follow the pre-existing rules.

 

[geoffjennings79]

Why can't I find the following players on the club website or any AFL media?!

Daniels
McCrae
Keith
Baku
O'Neil
Van Der Mier
Gardiner

BF posters imply they exist. Like Jim Edmonds, Ryan Hargraves and Tory Dixon...

 

[manutd/dogs]

View attachment 1975176

Sooooo many things annoy me these days. It's one of the great joys of aging.

So it occurred to me that we need a thread that enables us (mainly me) to vent at things around the periphery of footy. Not game or player performance reviews, trade or list management, this coach or that (I mean back in my day we had these concepts called consolidation and efficiency where you didn't need 10 threads to talk about the same thing ... and a thread was something you picked at on your shirt).

People or things that annoy you. It could be a player or a coach but it's their appearance, tatts, haircut, shirt, their voice, lazy eye or language that annoys you. The important stuff.

Most commentatoes annoy me. Particularly Brayshaw and Underwood. Stop farking yelling at me! If wanna be yelled at, I can not put the bins out or forget the milk.

And this fixation with journeys. Everything's a farking journey. No! No more journeys. It's time for an expedition in a window of opportunity. Nah, I'm over windows too.

Interstate supporters:

"Dear Mr. Dillon: There are too many Victorian teams nowadays. Please eliminate three. I am not a crackpot."​

​

​

 

[Mojorisin]

Why can't I find the following players on the club website or any AFL media?!

Daniels
McCrae
Keith
Baku
O'Neil
Van Der Mier
Gardiner

BF posters imply they exist. Like Jim Edmonds, Ryan Hargraves and Tory Dixon...

Baku is a personal favourite of mine

 

[House_of_Dahl]

People driving slowly in the right lane.

10 kms under the limit when single lane, speeding up to 10kms over when there is an overtaking lane! Aaaaarrrrrggggghhhh!!

 

[geoffjennings79]

People driving slowly in the right lane.

10 kms under the limit when single lane, speeding up to 10kms over when there is an overtaking lane! Aaaaarrrrrggggghhhh!!

You should try commuting regularly on the Western Hwy between Ballarat and Melbourne.
The number of people who sit in the right lane doing 100 (or less) in a 110 zone with no vehicles ahead of them in either lane...

I'm guessing some of them are international tourists, but surely the expectation is you comply with local road rules?

Regardless of whether tourists or ignorant locals, my high beam, horn and friendly advice are often required to be engaged so they are better informed.

 

[Bulldog rick]

No bulldog games in Qld for the past 2 years. Come on AFL what the hell.

 

[ScragCity]

The multiverse theory pisses me off