Collingwood Joke

[Jhzz]

50,000 Collingwood Fans meet at the MCG for a "Collingwood Fans Are Not Stupid" Convention.

Eddie says, "We are all here today to prove to the world that Collingwood Fans are not stupid. Can i have some volunteers?"


Nick Maxwell & Dane Swan gingerly work their way through the crowd and step up to the stage.


Eddie asks them, "What is fifteen plus fifteen?"


15 or 20 seconds after they were whispering to eachother, Nick says "Eighteen!"


Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then all 50,000 Collingwood Fans start chanting, "GIVE THEM ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE THEM ANOTHER CHANCE!"


Eddie says, "Well since we've gone to the trouble of getting 50,000 of you in one place and we have the world wide press and global broadcast media here, I think we can give them another chance."


So he asks, "What is seven plus seven?"


After nearly 30 seconds they eventually say, "Ninety!"


Eddie is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh, everyone is disheartened.


Dane Swan starts crying and the 50,000 Collingwood Fans begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, "GIVE THEM ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE THEM ANOTHER CHANCE!"


Eddie, unsure whether or not he is doing more harm than good, eventually says, "OK! OK! Just one more chance...What is two plus two?"


They both talk to eachother then after a whole minute they both close their eyes and say, "Four!"


Throughout the stadium pandemonium breaks out as all 50,000 Collingwood Fans jump to their feet, wave their arms, stamp their feet and scream...




"GIVE THEM ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE THEM ANOTHER CHANCE!"

*

This Joke was brought to you by Jhzz ​

 

[Stifler's mom]

Hardly worth the trouble typing that whole "joke".

 

[mattdwyer]

Thread Of The Year Goes To: JHZZ !!

Brilliant ..

 

[Grockadoc]

Hahahaha omg this post just made my day lol

 

[Jhzz]

Hardly worth the trouble typing that whole "joke".

It's worth typing to my fellow Richmond fans.

 

[Spielvogel]

 

[deliberate!!]

Hardly worth the trouble typing that whole "joke".

Still, it got you...hook, line and sinker.

 

[Grockadoc]

You are trapped in a room with a crocodile, a tiger and a Collingwood fan. You have a gun with 2 bullets. What do you do?




















Shoot the Collingwood fan – Twice

 

[Jhzz]

You are trapped in a room with a crocodile, a tiger and a Collingwood fan. You have a gun with 2 bullets. What do you do?














Shoot the Collingwood fan – Twice

Niccce, ohh so many jokes about collingwood.

 

[Ah Cheung]

I liked it!

 

[one eyedtiger]

LOL, nice

 

[Dylz48]

haha like your work boys heres a Richmond joke for you

 

[brjafi]

Ha ha ha
ha ha

 

[Grockadoc]

haha like your work boys heres a Richmond joke for you

Oh how original. See the blur. It means someone is running past. See unlike your boys our team arent running form something or someone. Wish the same could be said for your blokes and the cops

 

[Dylz48]

Oh how original. See the blur. It means someone is running past. See unlike your boys our team arent running form something or someone. Wish the same could be said for your blokes and the cops

and I take your very orignal collingwood criminal joke and raise it with another original richmond recruiting joke

 

[Spielvogel]

and I take your very orignal collingwood criminal joke and raise it with another original richmond recruiting joke

Dude, thats a picture, not a joke.

 

[deliberate!!]

This thread for Collingwood fools.

 

[the ranger]

and I take your very orignal collingwood criminal joke and raise it with another original richmond recruiting joke

I'd post a picture of Danny Roach (Collingwood's #7 selection in 1999, career statistics of 1 tackle) but I don't think anyone ever bothered to take one.

 

[Scodog10]

lol how's bout we get pics of Mark Graham, Shane Morrison and Kent Kingsley for u, they'd go well with the pic of Roach hey Dylz48 the envy is strong in these ones isn't it

 

[the ranger]

lol how's bout we get pics of Mark Graham, Shane Morrison and Kent Kingsley for u, they'd go well with the pic of Roach hey Dylz48 the envy is strong in these ones isn't it

mark graham - pick 65, 20 games
shane morrison - pick 64, 8 games
kent kingsley - PSD pick, 3 games

none of them really in danny roach's class (pick 7, 1 game), are they?

if you're desperate to find friends for danny, maybe you should look at collingwood's 2003 draft where your first three picks (#17 billy morrison, #32 brayden shaw and #35 brent hall) managed a total of 1 career game between them

we've made some blunders, but collingwood...lol

 

[TheCuzEffect]

lol how's bout we get pics of Mark Graham, Shane Morrison and Kent Kingsley for u, they'd go well with the pic of Roach hey Dylz48 the envy is strong in these ones isn't it

Mick Malthouse the coach of Collingwood Magpies gets wind of potential young recruit who lives in Iraq. Malthouse and the Magpies recruiting Manager catch a plane to the troubled Iraq capital Baghdad and track the young boy down.

They risk life and limb dodging car bombs, bullets and grenades but finally find him and convince him to come to Australia.

The boy does a full pre-season, plays all the practice matches and gets picked on the bench in the seniors for the first game of the year.


Ten minutes into the first quarter, Dale Thomas goes down with a severe knee injury. Malthouse turns to the boy and says "This is it son, go to the centre half forward and show us what you can do."

The boy proceeds to play the greatest debut game in AFL history. He kicks 9 goals, takes mark of the year, and kicks the winning goal after the siren from outside 50.

The Magpies chair him off the ground and give him three cheers back in the rooms. Malthouse tells the team what the boy from Iraq has been through and he is a model lesson for all.

Malthouse then pulls the boy aside and says "Go into my office son , ring your Mother and tell her what you did today."

He proceeds to do so. "Mum", he says down the phone, "Guess what I did today?"
"I don't care what you did today." His Mother replies. "I tell you what happened here today", she goes on. "Your Dad was stabbed and robbed, our house was torched, our car blown up, your sister was attacked and your brother was abducted."

"Gee" says the boy. "I feel a bit responsible for what happened."

The Mother replies "So you should be, if it wasn't for you we would never have shifted to Collingwood."

 

[Dylz48]

Dude, thats a picture, not a joke.

Grrr He didn't explain the joke in-depthly with words I'm getting angry

Sorry poor form hope thats better

 

[TheCuzEffect]

A Family of Collingwood supporters head out one Saturday morning to do their Christmas shoplifting. While in Rebel Sports the son picks up a Richmond footy jumper and says to his 10 year old sister, "I've decided to become a Tiger supporter and I would like this for Christmas". His sister, outraged by this, promptly whacks him round the head with her carton of Winfields and says, "Go talk to Mum.

Off goes the little lad with the Richmond footy jumper in hand and finds his mother. "Mum?" "Yes son?" "I've decided I'm going to be a Tiger supporter and I would like this jumper for Christmas". The mother is outraged at this and throws her moccasins and a full stubbie of VB at him, promptly whacks him around the head and says, "lets go talk to your father".

Off they go to Pentridge during visiting hours with footy jumper in hand and find bubba, his father. "Dad?" "Yes son?" "I've decided I'm going to be a Richmond supporter and I would like this jumper for Christmas". The father is outraged and promptly whacks his son around the head with his fists and says, "No son of mine is ever going to be seen in THAT", and then kicks him from one end of the rec. room to the other for further good measure.

About half an hour later they're all back in the car and heading towards home (Reservoir). The mother turns to her son and says "Son, I hope you've learned something today?" The son says, "Yes knackers I have." "Good son, what is it?"

The son replies, "I've only been a Richmond supporter for an hour and already I hate you Collingwood bastards."

 

[TheCuzEffect]

Grrr He didn't explain the joke in-depthly with words I'm getting angry

Sorry poor form hope thats better

Bay 13 originallity gotta love it... And A Red CArd gotta love it

 

[Richm0ndrule]

A Family of Collingwood supporters head out one Saturday morning to do their Christmas shoplifting. While in Rebel Sports the son picks up a Richmond footy jumper and says to his 10 year old sister, "I've decided to become a Tiger supporter and I would like this for Christmas". His sister, outraged by this, promptly whacks him round the head with her carton of Winfields and says, "Go talk to Mum.

Off goes the little lad with the Richmond footy jumper in hand and finds his mother. "Mum?" "Yes son?" "I've decided I'm going to be a Tiger supporter and I would like this jumper for Christmas". The mother is outraged at this and throws her moccasins and a full stubbie of VB at him, promptly whacks him around the head and says, "lets go talk to your father".

Off they go to Pentridge during visiting hours with footy jumper in hand and find bubba, his father. "Dad?" "Yes son?" "I've decided I'm going to be a Richmond supporter and I would like this jumper for Christmas". The father is outraged and promptly whacks his son around the head with his fists and says, "No son of mine is ever going to be seen in THAT", and then kicks him from one end of the rec. room to the other for further good measure.

About half an hour later they're all back in the car and heading towards home (Reservoir). The mother turns to her son and says "Son, I hope you've learned something today?" The son says, "Yes knackers I have." "Good son, what is it?"

The son replies, "I've only been a Richmond supporter for an hour and already I hate you Collingwood bastards."

aahahhAHAHAHAHAHHAH thats funny.