Roast Grumpy Old Thread 2019- over priced Breakfasts

Kanga Glory

Club Legend
Nov 1, 2010
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arden st
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North Melbourne
Lads. Brethren. North Melbourne alumni.
I need some advice.

My future mother in law has a duck problem with them infiltrating and leaving droppings in the swimming pool.
Covers aren’t an option and we’ve tried everything else on the net.

Anyone have an idea of what may work or something left field? Getting a dog and shooting them have been ruled out.

There is only one option, a full size cut out of the original Duck - Wayne ‘duck’ Carey . The ducks will shit themselves and leave the area 😉
 

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blackshadow

Premium Gold
Sep 24, 2007
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Lads. Brethren. North Melbourne alumni.
I need some advice.

My future mother in law has a duck problem with them infiltrating and leaving droppings in the swimming pool.
Covers aren’t an option and we’ve tried everything else on the net.

Anyone have an idea of what may work or something left field? Getting a dog and shooting them have been ruled out.
If you're not allowed to shoot them...

The neighbours might get grumpy but it will do the trick.
 

LuvtheKangas

Brownlow Medallist
Mar 11, 2006
15,017
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Bottom of the ladder
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Lads. Brethren. North Melbourne alumni.
I need some advice.

My future mother in law has a duck problem with them infiltrating and leaving droppings in the swimming pool.
Covers aren’t an option and we’ve tried everything else on the net.

Anyone have an idea of what may work or something left field? Getting a dog and shooting them have been ruled out.
Have you investigated the use of sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads?
 

tazaa

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Apr 11, 2007
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Are they flying over a fence to get into the Pool? Are they swimming in the pool?
Yep. Basically teaching their ducklings like skills in the pool.
We just scare them away. Like, run at them with a stick and yell. Only need to do it a few times and they get the message.
Tried this. Fake crocodiles, fake, owls, fake snakes, tried aspirin, tried a stealth beeping sound that’s meant to deter them. Nothing has worked. This pool is their annual nesting ground.
There is only one option, a full size cut out of the original Duck - Wayne ‘duck’ Carey . The ducks will s**t themselves and leave the area 😉
I couldn’t leave The King out in the rain :(
If you're not allowed to shoot them...

The neighbours might get grumpy but it will do the trick.
I’m going to suss this now🙏🏼
 

Gasometer

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Mar 14, 2002
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Yep. Basically teaching their ducklings like skills in the pool.

Tried this. Fake crocodiles, fake, owls, fake snakes, tried aspirin, tried a stealth beeping sound that’s meant to deter them. Nothing has worked. This pool is their annual nesting ground.

I couldn’t leave The King out in the rain :(

I’m going to suss this now🙏🏼
The Zon Guns can be heard from kilometres away; they use them on Orchards up here. They will scare everyone and everything
 

ferball

Premium Platinum
Jul 24, 2015
12,868
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Lads. Brethren. North Melbourne alumni.
I need some advice.

My future mother in law has a duck problem with them infiltrating and leaving droppings in the swimming pool.
Covers aren’t an option and we’ve tried everything else on the net.

Anyone have an idea of what may work or something left field? Getting a dog and shooting them have been ruled out.
Have you thought about just shooting them and not bothering with the dog?
 

blackshadow

Premium Gold
Sep 24, 2007
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Lads. Brethren. North Melbourne alumni.
I need some advice.

My future mother in law has a duck problem with them infiltrating and leaving droppings in the swimming pool.
Covers aren’t an option and we’ve tried everything else on the net.

Anyone have an idea of what may work or something left field? Getting a dog and shooting them have been ruled out.
You could do what Tony soprano did and get therapy...

 

tazaa

Brownlow Medallist
Apr 11, 2007
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The Zon Guns can be heard from kilometres away; they use them on Orchards up here. They will scare everyone and everything
I watched the link that blackshadow posted. If the frequency can be altered so that the bang isn’t that loud it only needs to be operational for a few minutes a day.
Have you thought about just shooting them and not bothering with the dog?
I got my gun licence 7 years ago but don’t own a rifle nor do the in-laws.
I used to tag along hunting quail, etc but not anymore so needed an alternative. Every expert has just said to shoot them or get a dog but they have 2 cats already who remain indoor.
Aspirin in bread has been the latest tactic lol
Didn’t work they didn’t bite
 

Gasometer

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I watched the link that blackshadow posted. If the frequency can be altered so that the bang isn’t that loud it only needs to be operational for a few minutes a day.

I got my gun licence 7 years ago but don’t own a rifle nor do the in-laws.
I used to tag along hunting quail, etc but not anymore so needed an alternative. Every expert has just said to shoot them or get a dog but they have 2 cats already who remain indoor.
Aspirin in bread has been the latest tactic lol
Didn’t work they didn’t bite
Birds who are persistent don’t care about much

Trust me, come March there are at least three orchards blasting
 

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ferball

Premium Platinum
Jul 24, 2015
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Birds who are persistent don’t care about much

Trust me, come March there are at least three orchards blasting
A bunch of mates and I used out to the Urbenville pub in NSW to watch the first SoO game each year. The night would usually end after midnight with the publican handing out rums and whatever else.

The following morning the crop protection guns would usually start around 4 or 5 am.

Perfect for a humungous hangover.

They were operating a couple of kms out of town too.
 

SpiderBurton22

Norm Smith Medallist
Mar 17, 2012
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Cockles hate water being sprayed at them.
Lorne Hotel have them available on most tables for patrons to use.
They're fricken everywhere at Lorne, the tourists love them, but water doesn't bother them here.

We've got pop up sprinklers on our ground and they'll just move to another part of the ground.

We've tried putting cut up pieces of garden hose on the centre wicket area. Apparently they look like snakes. This works for a while until they figure it out. Roping off the square and tying plastic shopping bags to the rope seems to work the best.
 

Nate7

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Sep 3, 2012
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They're fricken everywhere at Lorne, the tourists love them, but water doesn't bother them here.

We've got pop up sprinklers on our ground and they'll just move to another part of the ground.

We've tried putting cut up pieces of garden hose on the centre wicket area. Apparently they look like snakes. This works for a while until they figure it out. Roping off the square and tying plastic shopping bags to the rope seems to work the best.
Because certain nationalities DGAF and feed them which in turn brings more and more (to Lorne).

I found being persistent with them and they F off!
 

WayneShimmiesTheBush

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Oct 17, 2018
188
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I just got back from a holiday and as the plane landed we all waited as the captain turned off the seatbelt sign. now as far as i am concerned, you always wait for the people in front of you to leave the plane first before you start exiting. well to my annoyance some bloke just starts walking down the isle from the back of the plane pushing his way through. he obviously was in a hurry to get off but so are the rest of us. unless you are having a heart attack buddy, you can wait for your turn to exit. i know it might be trivial but this stuff really grinds my gears.

but folks there was a happy ending to the story. it was so good to see this bloke waiting at the carousel for his luggage as i was walking away with mine. i did have a small giggle to myself as i was walking away wishing that the guys luggage was the last to come out. i hope the irony gods granted my wish.
 

gokangas

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Jan 16, 2004
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I just got back from a holiday and as the plane landed we all waited as the captain turned off the seatbelt sign. now as far as i am concerned, you always wait for the people in front of you to leave the plane first before you start exiting. well to my annoyance some bloke just starts walking down the isle from the back of the plane pushing his way through. he obviously was in a hurry to get off but so are the rest of us. unless you are having a heart attack buddy, you can wait for your turn to exit. i know it might be trivial but this stuff really grinds my gears.

but folks there was a happy ending to the story. it was so good to see this bloke waiting at the carousel for his luggage as i was walking away with mine. i did have a small giggle to myself as i was walking away wishing that the guys luggage was the last to come out. i hope the irony gods granted my wish.
I thought for many years there must have been a prize for being first off the plane. Then one day I was first off. No prize.
 

Gasometer

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Did he get the lap record? Last year Scott Mclaughlin set it after smashing Murph''s "lap of the gods" from 2003.

Scott McLaughlin has broken the Mount Panorama lap record for the third time in successive days to clinch ARMOR ALL Pole Position for the Supercheap Auto Bathurst 1000.

The Shell V-Power Racing star was the last man out in the Top 10 Shootout and it quickly became apparent that a special moment was on the cards.

McLaughlin went fastest in all three sectors to deliver a breathtaking 2:03.3783s to go more than a tenth faster than the benchmark he had set on Friday.
 

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