Bluelegs
Celebrating what we're good at
It’s a dreary Sunday morning as I sit up in bed. I have the doona covering me, a coffee on my bedside table and the iPad in hand as I partake in one of my favourite weekend activities. Reading the BigFooty Richmond board after a loss. While the board is always a fascinating read it’s these moments where the best work is done.
Across the first page is a mess of various game review threads following Tigers losses. Within, Richmond posters isolate examples of incorrect officiating by umpires against their club. Although many examples seem to lack a basic understanding of the rules, the Richmond posters are finding patterns. Patterns that will expose the truth of the AFL-led conspiracy against their club.
In the ‘Non-Richmond AFL discussion’ thread, victories by the top sides earn comments ‘You don’t win premierships in April’ which are met with broad agreement. Some kind-hearted posters look upon the plights of long struggling sides and decide they are going to venture to those teams’ boards to relay the inspirational tale of how Richmond pulled themselves up by their own bootstraps and went on to become the powerhouse they are today. All agree that this would be much appreciated by opposition posters.
However, this all pales in comparison to what is to be the real show today. The various regulars of the board await a single poster to arrive. The anonymous poster, simply known as ‘U’ claims to be a high-ranking employee within the AFL’s umpiring division. For years, this mysterious figure has been making posts, better known as ‘U drops’. Which detail the inner workings of the AFL.
Now this may seem like a bunch of incoherent nonsense, but to Richmond supporters it all makes perfect sense. There are many theories that Richmond posters have concocted in response to these U drops. One suggests that the AFL deliberately booked Ed Sheeran to play before the season to rip up the MCG turf leading to Richmond’s various injuries. Another suggests the AFL created Gather Round to take away a Richmond home game. One poster points out that in the fixture, of their six double ups, THREE are against last year’s finalists, and that this shows irrefutable evidence the AFL did not want Richmond playing finals. One brave poster pleads for reason: Pointing out that like many sides before them, their fall down the ladder is just the cyclical nature of the AFL, that their stars had gotten old and weren’t the same players they once were, that their youth had been taken later in the draft and isn’t as talented as those of yesteryear. This poster is swiftly banned.
Among all the theories and imagined scenarios there is a widely held belief among adherents of UAnon.
The common thread is that Brendan Gale has been waging a secret war within the AFL to preserve the code of Australian Rules Football and return the sport to its former glory. The day every Richmond supporter is waiting for is ‘The Great Awakening’. When Brendan Gale will take control of the AFL, expose the umpires, remove the stand rule and return Richmond to their rightful place as perpetual premiers for the rest of time. That Gillon McLachlan’s departure from the top job has taken so long is just the AFL trying to delay the inevitable.
In response to this secret war, the AFL and Stephen Hocking have been using the rules and officiating of the game to keep the Tigers from contending. You see, Richmond was never supposed to win the flag in 2017 and since then the AFL has been doing everything in their power to keep Richmond down. Despite these efforts, Richmond found a way to win two more flags. Truly an incredible feat for a side that were literally having their matches fixed.
Nobody knows who ‘U’ really is. Some believe it’s David Rodan, the former Tiger-turned Umpire, who most agree has not yet made an incorrect decision against Richmond. Others believe it’s the work of Mario from Doncaster, just killing time while bored at the service station. And some believe that U is none other than Brendan Gale himself.
You may be asking why the AFL don’t want Richmond to be successful. Wouldn’t it be good for the competition to have a club with over 100,000 supporters fill the stands of the MCG every week? Well, dear Reader, you couldn’t be more wrong.
The truth is that the communist AFL pursue a goal of absolute equalisation. Their ultimate goal is to see every team be perfectly equal, 9 games a week should result in 9 draws, and every game should be attended by the AFL average of 30,000 people. In Steve Hockings own words, ‘if the crowd is bigger than the capacity of Kardinia Park then it’s just too many people.’
Richmond are the greatest threat to this goal, as left undisturbed they would win by 200 points every week. Unfortunately for Tigers fans, I don’t think The Great Awakening is set to occur quite yet. Expect the umpires to get the Dees over the line.
Melbourne by 28 points.
Across the first page is a mess of various game review threads following Tigers losses. Within, Richmond posters isolate examples of incorrect officiating by umpires against their club. Although many examples seem to lack a basic understanding of the rules, the Richmond posters are finding patterns. Patterns that will expose the truth of the AFL-led conspiracy against their club.
In the ‘Non-Richmond AFL discussion’ thread, victories by the top sides earn comments ‘You don’t win premierships in April’ which are met with broad agreement. Some kind-hearted posters look upon the plights of long struggling sides and decide they are going to venture to those teams’ boards to relay the inspirational tale of how Richmond pulled themselves up by their own bootstraps and went on to become the powerhouse they are today. All agree that this would be much appreciated by opposition posters.
However, this all pales in comparison to what is to be the real show today. The various regulars of the board await a single poster to arrive. The anonymous poster, simply known as ‘U’ claims to be a high-ranking employee within the AFL’s umpiring division. For years, this mysterious figure has been making posts, better known as ‘U drops’. Which detail the inner workings of the AFL.
Now this may seem like a bunch of incoherent nonsense, but to Richmond supporters it all makes perfect sense. There are many theories that Richmond posters have concocted in response to these U drops. One suggests that the AFL deliberately booked Ed Sheeran to play before the season to rip up the MCG turf leading to Richmond’s various injuries. Another suggests the AFL created Gather Round to take away a Richmond home game. One poster points out that in the fixture, of their six double ups, THREE are against last year’s finalists, and that this shows irrefutable evidence the AFL did not want Richmond playing finals. One brave poster pleads for reason: Pointing out that like many sides before them, their fall down the ladder is just the cyclical nature of the AFL, that their stars had gotten old and weren’t the same players they once were, that their youth had been taken later in the draft and isn’t as talented as those of yesteryear. This poster is swiftly banned.
Among all the theories and imagined scenarios there is a widely held belief among adherents of UAnon.
The common thread is that Brendan Gale has been waging a secret war within the AFL to preserve the code of Australian Rules Football and return the sport to its former glory. The day every Richmond supporter is waiting for is ‘The Great Awakening’. When Brendan Gale will take control of the AFL, expose the umpires, remove the stand rule and return Richmond to their rightful place as perpetual premiers for the rest of time. That Gillon McLachlan’s departure from the top job has taken so long is just the AFL trying to delay the inevitable.
In response to this secret war, the AFL and Stephen Hocking have been using the rules and officiating of the game to keep the Tigers from contending. You see, Richmond was never supposed to win the flag in 2017 and since then the AFL has been doing everything in their power to keep Richmond down. Despite these efforts, Richmond found a way to win two more flags. Truly an incredible feat for a side that were literally having their matches fixed.
Nobody knows who ‘U’ really is. Some believe it’s David Rodan, the former Tiger-turned Umpire, who most agree has not yet made an incorrect decision against Richmond. Others believe it’s the work of Mario from Doncaster, just killing time while bored at the service station. And some believe that U is none other than Brendan Gale himself.
You may be asking why the AFL don’t want Richmond to be successful. Wouldn’t it be good for the competition to have a club with over 100,000 supporters fill the stands of the MCG every week? Well, dear Reader, you couldn’t be more wrong.
The truth is that the communist AFL pursue a goal of absolute equalisation. Their ultimate goal is to see every team be perfectly equal, 9 games a week should result in 9 draws, and every game should be attended by the AFL average of 30,000 people. In Steve Hockings own words, ‘if the crowd is bigger than the capacity of Kardinia Park then it’s just too many people.’
Richmond are the greatest threat to this goal, as left undisturbed they would win by 200 points every week. Unfortunately for Tigers fans, I don’t think The Great Awakening is set to occur quite yet. Expect the umpires to get the Dees over the line.
Melbourne by 28 points.
