Roast The Melbourne Board NAPALM thread (hosted by Topkent)

[RandB]

Sounds like we need to hire someone to motivate the players, teach them to play to a game plan, improve them as individuals and as a team, etc etc. If only there was such a position in football...

Preferably someone with contacts in the meditation industry.

 

[Proper Gander]

Neil Craig said the best captain he had at Adelaide was Goodwin. Before people discard Neil Craig due to short memory this was back when Adelaide were a very good side throughout the mid 2000s.

Not sure where these dickhead comments are coming from tbh. That's not to say he'll be a successful head coach, that remains to be seen.

I think he has a bit of a reputation. That plus he was shooting himself up with hexarelin plus other exotic substances given to him without script from a non medico in a downstairs office at Windy Hill not so long before he was appointed. He may turn into a coaching genius, who knows, but I was somewhat surprised at the appointment.

 

[Ando727]

Sometimes I think people like Goodwin have more chance of success than the overly academic type coaches. People like Neil Craig gets too involved in his philosophies. People who are more concrete, less meandering with their train of thought are probably better suited to coaching - which is not to say you can be a simpleton, but you have to have a message that is not too complex, that allows players to use their judgement and you have to stay the course and not change your mind all the time about how to direct the players.

 

[Proper Gander]

Sometimes I think people like Goodwin have more chance of success than the overly academic type coaches. People like Neil Craig gets too involved in his philosophies. People who are more concrete, less meandering with their train of thought are probably better suited to coaching - which is not to say you can be a simpleton, but you have to have a message that is not too complex, that allows players to use their judgement and you have to stay the course and not change your mind all the time about how to direct the players.

You also have to coach to, and adjust your game plan to, the material on the park though - this makes me nervous. The attacking plan and full press did okay in a NAB context, but I don't think we have spent much time recruiting the type of players for what is conceived and the result could be more of what we saw yesterday. I also was hoping our coach selection might come from the Hawthorn stable, who seem to be breeding good strategists.

Ah well. No doubt we'll find out soon enough.

 

[schmuttt]

Garland has got to be the luckiest bloke at the MFC. When was the last time you honestly sat back post match and said to yourself 's**t garland played well today'? Lumumba is an incredibly dumb footballer but at least he tries to make things happen.

Also our forward structure. WTF IS WITH EVERYONE IN THE FORWARDLINE? GTFO AND LEAVE THE ACTUAL TARGETS SOME ROOM! Everyone s**t on Hogan for not leading but he had no space to lead into all game.

 

[Tulip]

Garland has got to be the luckiest bloke at the MFC. When was the last time you honestly sat back post match and said to yourself 's**t garland played well today'? Lumumba is an incredibly dumb footballer but at least he tries to make things happen.

Also our forward structure. WTF IS WITH EVERYONE IN THE FORWARDLINE? GTFO AND LEAVE THE ACTUAL TARGETS SOME ROOM! Everyone s**t on Hogan for not leading but he had no space to lead into all game.

Garland had a fair few good games last year. He just can't put two good years in a row together, which is incredibly frustrating.

 

[Dez!]

Garland has got to be the luckiest bloke at the MFC. When was the last time you honestly sat back post match and said to yourself 's**t garland played well today'? Lumumba is an incredibly dumb footballer but at least he tries to make things happen.

Also our forward structure. WTF IS WITH EVERYONE IN THE FORWARDLINE? GTFO AND LEAVE THE ACTUAL TARGETS SOME ROOM! Everyone s**t on Hogan for not leading but he had no space to lead into all game.

Garland had to get shifted on to Daniher who he isn't suited to play on because Tom McDonald s**t the bed and proved that he is without a doubt the dumbest footballer going around.

 

[Gysberts2Bate]

Tom McDonald is the kind of bloke that will eventually have an AA season at FB and then let his direct opponent kick 9 on him on Grand Final day.

Good thing is that when it happens it'll be for another club.

 

[schmuttt]

The more I watch TMac the more I think a key defender should be at the top of our shopping list.

 

[ThePuppetMaster]

The more I watch TMac the more I think a key defender should be at the top of our shopping list.

I don't think so - he just needs to play within his limits, he does a heap of good things.

Who could forget how important he was last week?

However, when we defend like s**t in the middle and allow transition he's not going to beat a 6'7 player with huge reach on his own.

 

[Gysberts2Bate]

We don't need a new KPD. The elite one we have on our list just needs to be more consistent.

 

[Gysberts2Bate]

http://www.melbournefc.com.au/news/2016-04-04/inside-melbourne-round-two

1 – The first loss of season

It wasn’t great. It wasn’t expected. But interestingly, Melbourne entered round two as the only undefeated team this year, counting the NAB Challenge and round one. Only Fremantle, Melbourne and Collingwood won all three NAB Challenge games, but Freo and the Magpies lost comfortably in round one, meaning Melbourne was technically the last of the 18 teams to suffer a defeat in 2016.

Well I guess that means we won the technical premiership, right?

 

[Dez!]

I don't think so - he just needs to play within his limits, he does a heap of good things.

Who could forget how important he was last week?

However, when we defend like s**t in the middle and allow transition he's not going to beat a 6'7 player with huge reach on his own.

When he's the one turning the ball over because he has the skills of a 5 year old in the back half we aren't winning many games.

We don't need a new KPD. The elite one we have on our list just needs to be more consistent.

You mean the one we have needs to not be a f***ing moron?

 

[schmuttt]

TMac gets beaten by the genuinely big guys. How is he going to go over the next 5 years against Daniher/Boyd/Schache etc?

 

[Deemanding]

Losing to the worst team in the league...here's our 11 year history history:

(Year) 2006 - (Wooden Spoon Winner) Carlton - (Our result when played them) Lost both games, despite playing finals that season
2007 - Richmond - Thrashed us by 49 points which led to ND's departure
2008 and 2009 - N/A as that was us...
2010 - West Coast - lost by 29 points at the MCG
2011 - Gold Coast - well we beat Gold Coast both times but saved Port from the wooden spoon in the final game by failing to win at Adelaide Oval
2012 - GWS - ok managed to get through both of those games with a win
2013 - GWS - gave them their only win for the season
2014 - St Kilda - shitty round 1 result with inaccurate kicking, despite them missing a lot of their midfield
2015 - Carlton - woeful first half performance ensured we couldn't catch up
2016 - Essendon perhaps - yep what else should we expect

 

[PerfectFooty]

Losing to the worst team in the league...here's our 11 year history history:

(Year) 2006 - (Wooden Spoon Winner) Carlton - (Our result when played them) Lost both games, despite playing finals that season
2007 - Richmond - Thrashed us by 49 points which led to ND's departure
2008 and 2009 - N/A as that was us...
2010 - West Coast - lost by 29 points at the MCG
2011 - Gold Coast - well we beat Gold Coast both times but saved Port from the wooden spoon in the final game by failing to win at Adelaide Oval
2012 - GWS - ok managed to get through both of those games with a win
2013 - GWS - gave them their only win for the season
2014 - St Kilda - shitty round 1 result with inaccurate kicking, despite them missing a lot of their midfield
2015 - Carlton - woeful first half performance ensured we couldn't catch up
2016 - Essendon perhaps - yep what else should we expect

I remember the last coupl fo rounds we played Gold Coast in 2011 and GWS and 2012 where very poor wins against teams in their first year

 

[Gysberts2Bate]

Losing to the worst team in the league...here's our 11 year history history:

(Year) 2006 - (Wooden Spoon Winner) Carlton - (Our result when played them) Lost both games, despite playing finals that season
2007 - Richmond - Thrashed us by 49 points which led to ND's departure
2008 and 2009 - N/A as that was us...
2010 - West Coast - lost by 29 points at the MCG
2011 - Gold Coast - well we beat Gold Coast both times but saved Port from the wooden spoon in the final game by failing to win at Adelaide Oval
2012 - GWS - ok managed to get through both of those games with a win
2013 - GWS - gave them their only win for the season
2014 - St Kilda - shitty round 1 result with inaccurate kicking, despite them missing a lot of their midfield
2015 - Carlton - woeful first half performance ensured we couldn't catch up
2016 - Essendon perhaps - yep what else should we expect

My God this is dismal.

 

[Sando22]

Garland has got to be the luckiest bloke at the MFC. When was the last time you honestly sat back post match and said to yourself 's**t garland played well today'? Lumumba is an incredibly dumb footballer but at least he tries to make things happen.

Also our forward structure. WTF IS WITH EVERYONE IN THE FORWARDLINE? GTFO AND LEAVE THE ACTUAL TARGETS SOME ROOM! Everyone s**t on Hogan for not leading but he had no space to lead into all game.

Totally agree. Has flown under the radar for a while now. Was better when Frawley was in the side and playing well but struggles if and when the heat is on him.

 

[Tempy Tiger]

Totally agree. Has flown under the radar for a while now. Was better when Frawley was in the side and playing well but struggles if and when the heat is on him.

Has an intensity level matching that of Watts. Comparable level of physicality too. Competitors is not the first word that springs to mind...

 

[Sir Hugh Percy]

Losing to the worst team in the league...here's our 11 year history history:

(Year) 2006 - (Wooden Spoon Winner) Carlton - (Our result when played them) Lost both games, despite playing finals that season
2007 - Richmond - Thrashed us by 49 points which led to ND's departure
2008 and 2009 - N/A as that was us...
2010 - West Coast - lost by 29 points at the MCG
2011 - Gold Coast - well we beat Gold Coast both times but saved Port from the wooden spoon in the final game by failing to win at Adelaide Oval
2012 - GWS - ok managed to get through both of those games with a win
2013 - GWS - gave them their only win for the season
2014 - St Kilda - shitty round 1 result with inaccurate kicking, despite them missing a lot of their midfield
2015 - Carlton - woeful first half performance ensured we couldn't catch up
2016 - Essendon perhaps - yep what else should we expect

s**t! When you see it laid out like that...

 

[Sando22]

Has an intensity level matching that of Watts. Comparable level of physicality too. Competitors is not the first word that springs to mind...[/QUOTY
Yeah agree!

 

[Proper Gander]

Are you trying to disguise the exclamation mark by burying it in the quote?

Don't think I'm not on to you...

 

[Sando22]

Are you trying to disguise the exclamation mark by burying it in the quote?

Don't think I'm not on to you...[/QUOTE!!]
Haha! Yeah not sure what happened there but I'll try and do it again!

 

[Proper Gander]

okay so this is weirding me out now. you win

 

[Tulip]

TMac gets beaten by the genuinely big guys. How is he going to go over the next 5 years against Daniher/Boyd/Schache etc?

Yep. Unless they pull their heads in and play Frost down back, trying for Hooker needs to be a priority.