Toast Types of people at the footy

[Lavender Bushranger]

The reluctant wife

Comes to the game with her husband but has no interest and just sits on Facebook on her phone the whole time.

....but secretly is desperately barracking for his team just so she doesn't have to put up with his s**t for the next 3-4 days if they lose.

 

[Demonic Ascent]

If there not a dead bread there are barely any left but they used to be very common

The radio without headphones guy

Can't just buy headphones has to have his radio on so everyone else has to listen to the commentary as well.

I mentioned the headphones guy earlier in the thread but what I didn't mention is they'll always try to engage in some kind of conversation with you about something the radio commentators said "ah bloody hell Levers off, done his ankle" but it's always one way because they can never hear anything you say back to them (and they never intended to).

 

[deedog2]

The reluctant wife

Comes to the game with her husband but has no interest and just sits on Facebook on her phone the whole time.

Don't know how they are still together

 

[deedog2]

I mentioned the headphones guy earlier in the thread but what I didn't mention is they'll always try to engage in some kind of conversation with you about something the radio commentators said "ah bloody hell Levers off, done his ankle" but it's always one way because they can never hear anything you say back to them (and they never intended to).

'Yeah he's done mate, done...'

 

[Van_Dyke]

I won't lie - my normal seats are on level 2 flank at Marvel, and there have been a couple of games where "I'm a chance to mark this" has slipped out

as someone who sits on level 2 at optus near enough to behind the goals, do/don't kick it to me depending on who's kicking it and the angle etc is prone to slipping out

The bloke whose team registers the first score of the day and proceeds to shout “BLOW THE SIREN!”

surely should saying "stop the count" these days to keep it fresher

 

[Demonic Ascent]

The person wearing a oppo guernsey at a match
That his side isn't even playing in
I can never understand that.

Is this a haiku? If so, well done.

 

[BringouttheGimp]

We could make a short movie/doco on this s**t man.

Be *en hilarious I reckon.

 

[Rezza Tiger]

How about when that that tall girl (or ironic hippy guy) with a giant top knot the size of a prize winning grapefruit plonks themself down right in front of you and you're stuck with that big hair ball bobbing around in font of you blocking half your view the entire game

 

[Demonic Ascent]

'Yeah he's done mate, done...'

After pondering how bad the injury is for a minute or two your heart skips a beat as you see Lever return to the ground, seemingly unimpeded by any injury concerns at all.

 

[Hubnester]

I don't get the hate on people wearing team guernseys. I'm not one of them, but isn't the point to be wearing your team colours?
I agree they should be limited to the footy though.

 

[Lavender Bushranger]

I don't get the hate on people wearing team guernseys. I'm not one of them, but isn't the point to be wearing your team colours?
I agree they should be limited to the footy though.

Once you hit 16, it's genuinely taboo to wear in gear.

Maybe a scarf or a beanie (not both) is acceptable. Beyond that, you're a straight up ******* weirdo.

 

[RAPPA]

Once you hit 16, it's genuinely taboo to wear in gear.

Maybe a scarf or a beanie (not both) is acceptable. Beyond that, you're a straight up ******* weirdo.

 

[Hubnester]

Once you hit 16, it's genuinely taboo to wear in gear.

Maybe a scarf or a beanie (not both) is acceptable. Beyond that, you're a straight up ******* weirdo.

Haha I like how there's a rule book for this.
I dunno, at the footy I expect it so I've never really looked at anyone and thought 'you for real?' unless they were over the top in terms of facepaint or something like that.

 

[Collingwood 4 eternity]

The trick to looking like some kind of expert is to wait until the ball is clearly sailing through and then find someone to tell them about how you could tell from the line of the run-up and the angle of the ball drop that it was going to be a goal.

Nobody believes me. I don't believe me. I do it anyway though.

The trick is to have one eye on the crowd early reactions ,behind the kicker and the other eye on the crowd early reactions behind the goals directly in line with the kick

 

[Collingwood 4 eternity]

Every game at the SCG in my bay I hear “SEVEN POINT PLAAAAY” after every behind by the Swans. If it’s another consecutive behind “EIGHT POINT PLAAAY” and so on

The SCG crowd in the early 80s started the grunt as the boundary umpire would hurl the ball in , and it still carries on to this day

 

[Collingwood 4 eternity]

The person with the hot thermos full of minestrone soup on a freezing cold day in the stands….it smells divine and everyone around you looks jealous and says ‘I wish I had of thought of that’

I’m that person with the flask

Barry Humphries on international flights , when the plane went through turbulence , would slyly empty a small tin of fruit salad into a spew bag.

And Making sure that those around him saw that he was unwell , pretend to utilise the spew bag , the hostess would come along later on a attempt to take the used bag , and he would quick as a flash pull out a spoon open the bag and starting eating from it with a “nah you can’t take that , that’s my lunch”

 

[Dipper]

The very old lady sitting in the row in front of you

With her piece of paper and pen, with the name of each player scrawled in CAPITAL LETTERS and each score recorded

She's a relic of a bygone era, before smartphones, the internet or even The Beatles. In her childhood the Footy Record was seen as a luxury, one the thrifty could do without

You feel she is where she belongs in life. At peace, enjoying one of her true loves. You're glad she's there

"...or even the Beatles..."

Genius.

Sent from my SM-A326B using BigFooty.com mobile app

 

[TubbsFarquhar]

Gotta give a shout out to adult males in full club merch.

Scarf, beanie, jumper etc.


I mean seriously, WTF dude.

I don the full kit. Guernsey, shorts, socks and boots. You just never know if you're going to get a late call-up moments before the match.

 

[Pedantic]

The guy who loudly announces the attendance like breaking news when everyone in the ground can see it's just come up on the big screen

 

[Madas]

Haha $heeet we were thinking of the same type of bloke at roughly the same time

That’s creepy

 

[Scotland]

Can anyone explain why a fully grown adult would do this?

 

[YeahGnar]

The bloke who would sit there the whole game repeating all of Rex Hunt's jokes, sayings and funny names for players, then looks around smugly like it his own original material

 

[Tim Evans Beard]

The Proud Auskick Family

They come in many flavours, but my favourite are those with no idea about football. New arrivals, accountants, AFL HQ staff, beige enthusiasts - anyone who doesn’t understand the game but is proud as punch the little one is running out.

Hanging over the player race 5 minutes before half-time with oversized iPads trying to get a photo of who they believe to be the next Buddy Franklin, or failing that, his less talented brother Lance Franklin.

After spending the first half hibernating and FaceTime-ing with relatives in far flung locations, they erupt in a cacophony of support as their little football good gets within 32 metres of the ball within the 40 metre playing surface.

I don’t get to many games these days but my seats are right near the corridor the kids run out to the ground from at Adelaide Oval. I don’t know these guys and they change every game - but I always ask who their kid is a tell them ‘she (or he) goes alight.’ and tap their shoulder.

 

[Engimal v3]

The guys with the green shirts and whistles

 

[RedmanWasHere]

The almost man ..the legend

With who appears to be Trout from Woodend.