Mod. Notice Depressed? Anxious? Call Beyond Blue (1300 224636), Lifeline (131114), resources in OP

[jedi mind tricks]

Hey mate, sorry to hear about your struggles. Are you actively looking for another job? I'd be doing that if I were you. These situations rarely resolve in a harmonious way once they start. I know you probably can't walk away from it while you are expecting a new baby, but there's no reason you can't start applying for other jobs. Of course, that's stressful in itself, starting again somewhere, but I think it will probably be easier than what you're dealing with now. Hopefully someday soon you can tell these jerks to stick it and go somewhere nicer.

Hey mate yes I've been working on a transfer. I have also been thinking about changing jobs but with a child on the way it is nervous times for me.

Thanks for the response it's been a very stressful time and something I hope I can get throughfir the sake of my family.

 

[Ando727]

Hey mate yes I've been working on a transfer. I have also been thinking about changing jobs but with a child on the way it is nervous times for me.

Thanks for the response it's been a very stressful time and something I hope I can get throughfir the sake of my family.

No worries, mate. We're here for you any time. There's no doubt having a child on the way causes extra stress, but if you can make a change I really think your family would benefit. It would be a fresh start for all of you. A happy dad is super important to a family.

 

[jedi mind tricks]

No worries, mate. We're here for you any time. There's no doubt having a child on the way causes extra stress, but if you can make a change I really think your family would benefit. It would be a fresh start for all of you. A happy dad is super important to a family.

Agreed fully and thank you

 

[captain cotch 9]

I made an appointment to go and see someone on Monday.
It will be my first time.
I've felt really done for a couple of months with some bad thoughts coming into my head.
This year has been really tough for me.
I jumped onto the beyond blue website and then onto man therapy sites to do their quizes and they both recommended that i talked to someone.
Im not sure how it will go as obviously I dont know the person and Im not the best at talking about my feelings to people that i dont know.

 

[Headless]

I made an appointment to go and see someone on Monday.
It will be my first time.
I've felt really done for a couple of months with some bad thoughts coming into my head.
This year has been really tough for me.
I jumped onto the beyond blue website and then onto man therapy sites to do their quizes and they both recommended that i talked to someone.
Im not sure how it will go as obviously I dont know the person and Im not the best at talking about my feelings to people that i dont know.

Outstanding - well done. Best of luck with it!

 

[jedi mind tricks]

I made an appointment to go and see someone on Monday.
It will be my first time.
I've felt really done for a couple of months with some bad thoughts coming into my head.
This year has been really tough for me.
I jumped onto the beyond blue website and then onto man therapy sites to do their quizes and they both recommended that i talked to someone.
Im not sure how it will go as obviously I dont know the person and Im not the best at talking about my feelings to people that i dont know.

Hey mate the fact you are doing something about it is a great start. You might find talking is easier when you are there. I spoke to my psych, gp and a friend and am happy that I did. Being open and honest with yourself can be the biggest help of all.

Best of luck

 

[Ando727]

I made an appointment to go and see someone on Monday.
It will be my first time.
I've felt really done for a couple of months with some bad thoughts coming into my head.
This year has been really tough for me.
I jumped onto the beyond blue website and then onto man therapy sites to do their quizes and they both recommended that i talked to someone.
Im not sure how it will go as obviously I dont know the person and Im not the best at talking about my feelings to people that i dont know.

Good one, mate. It gets easier from here.

 

[Richter]

Thought this article apt for this thread.

https://www.theguardian.com/comment...ife-of-men-youll-be-right-isnt-enough-anymore

I love my father. He’s kind and caring.

He grew up in a rural family of boys. He learnt from his father, who in turn learnt from his father, that expressing emotion didn’t coincide with his maleness. Not only was vulnerability not a choice, it just wasn’t an option. Things were left unsaid. The masculine ego left seemingly fortifiable. They were a generation of men strong and powerful but emotionally detached...

...

So, for the boys who are afraid to embrace emotion and for the boys who feel with no tears, let’s rid the fear of talking. For the men who feel silenced and for those who have already succumbed to their black cloud, let’s discuss the importance of emotion. For my friend shunned by fear and for my own 18 year-old self, let’s talk about mental health and anti-depressants. Let’s just talk. To speak of pain is to overcome struggle, and to advocate the truths of those still ostracised by the screaming mask. It’s this open and honest dialogue that is helping so many. It’s helping me.

As someone who takes anti-depressants, I’ve come to realise the importance of emotional vulnerability within such a hyper-masculine culture that prides itself on strength and invincibility. Let’s ask boys and men alike how they are feeling, behind the performance. There is strength in susceptibility, too.

“You’ll be right” isn’t enough anymore. No one deserves a black cloud.

 

[sammm]

My mother who is 80 got hit by a car 8 weeks ago. She has a fractured tibia. She was in hospital for 6 weeks due to not being able to put weight on her leg. she has been at her home for over a week and half, and ii can tell you that its difficult on all parties. she has a lot of pain, she is sometimes depressed, as she was supposed to go overseas for a wedding and could not go. She is not walking well and everything frustrates her. She is not allowed to walk her dog as yet, nor go shopping for herself.

I at times feel overwhelmed, my brother does not do much to help (he is 57 and lives with her)

 

[Kickpuncher]

Stay strong lads and lasses, the only way is up

I have posted in this thread before and deleted my posts as I didn't feel ready to share, but I have been dealing with minor depression but mainly GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder) since late in my high school days (2011). Thankfully I am slowly getting it under control but I do still have my rough days/weeks. It was at its peak in the last 2/3 years where I was unemployed. Put on weight, and my hair started receding rapidly which only ****ed me even more. I actually hit a point a few weeks ago where I looked in the mirror and felt like nothing would improve. I dont know why though but last night something clicked, and thought * it I'm going to do something about this. Went out today and bought a 1000w nutribullet and filled the fridge up with greens. I may not be the most motivated person to exercise, but I'm sure as hell going to start working on my diet which I think is part why I feel so constantly drained and stressed at times. Also I'm now working in fresh produce which means I get first pick on the best quality products although the hairline is still thinning but hey might as well lose the weight and make the bald head look good

Here's to every who's had a rough day, week, month, year/s! There is always a light at the end of the tunnel

pro tip - a kale, spinach, avo, pineapple, apple, and chia blended with ice and water goes down a treat

 

[Frank Gallagher]

Stay strong lads and lasses, the only way is up

I have posted in this thread before and deleted my posts as I didn't feel ready to share, but I have been dealing with minor depression but mainly GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder) since late in my high school days (2011). Thankfully I am slowly getting it under control but I do still have my rough days/weeks. It was at its peak in the last 2/3 years where I was unemployed. Put on weight, and my hair started receding rapidly which only stuffed me even more. I actually hit a point a few weeks ago where I looked in the mirror and felt like nothing would improve. I dont know why though but last night something clicked, and thought **** it I'm going to do something about this. Went out today and bought a 1000w nutribullet and filled the fridge up with greens. I may not be the most motivated person to exercise, but I'm sure as hell going to start working on my diet which I think is part why I feel so constantly drained and stressed at times. Also I'm now working in fresh produce which means I get first pick on the best quality products although the hairline is still thinning but hey might as well lose the weight and make the bald head look good

Here's to every who's had a rough day, week, month, year/s! There is always a light at the end of the tunnel

pro tip - a kale, spinach, avo, pineapple, apple, and chia blended with ice and water goes down a treat

Try working out, and hard, the human body isn't made for sitting around, work out and get your juices flowing brother, you'll be amazed how good you feel.

 

[Frank Gallagher]

I made an appointment to go and see someone on Monday.
It will be my first time.
I've felt really done for a couple of months with some bad thoughts coming into my head.
This year has been really tough for me.
I jumped onto the beyond blue website and then onto man therapy sites to do their quizes and they both recommended that i talked to someone.
Im not sure how it will go as obviously I dont know the person and Im not the best at talking about my feelings to people that i dont know.

I copped some weird dude when I went for help, I took my Mrs with me and even she said he needed more help than me lol.

TBH I'd prefer a female shrink.

 

[theprospect]

I feel like this is as good a platform as any to share my thoughts and feelings, as I don't really feel comfortable talking about it with even my closest friends and family, so maybe here can be an outlet to express my emotions.

Depression has been something that at different times throughout my life has had varying levels of impact, and can hit you like a brick wall at any moment in time without warning. I'm only 21 years old, but ever since I completed my VCE studies for various reasons I have been battling depression. It all started when I got my VCE results and didn't get the ATAR I needed to get me into my course of preference at University. I felt embarrassed whilst all of my friends around me did so well, and here I was without a clue as to what I would now do with my life in terms of furthering my education.

I felt an enormous weight of pressure from my parents especially, and when they found out about my 'failures' in VCE it was as if they stopped caring almost, and didn't have high hopes for me. Their attention automatically turned to my younger brother and has ever since, and I don't feel like I have a strong relationship with them at all. That summer I went away with some friends and became very close with one in particular, in fact I fell in love with her. She was the perfect girl for me, and I still to this day believe she is and I probably shouldn't but do hold out the hope that one day, we'll be together. I don't think I will ever be able to stop loving her. But when I told her how I felt, she didn't feel the same way. Our friendship was almost completely ruined by this and it absolutely drained me emotionally, compounding with the anxiety and embarrassment I had already felt after just leaving school with nothing to look forward to the next year. Eventually things were okay between us and she is my best friend still to this day, although I have to see her with someone else and it slowly makes me a little more devastated every time I see them. Why me? Why have things not gone my way, and what have I done to deserve this?

Before that summer I had never touched alcohol or drugs in my life. By the end of that summer I had consumed such a ridiculous amount of alcohol to try and combat these problems as I felt that by getting myself drunk it was an escape from reality. Whilst the only drug I have ever used is weed, and isn't something I am dependent on the fact that I was now using it to try and relax myself is something that I hate myself for. I probably drink once or twice per week, just going to the local with mates. But I still find myself getting drunk trying to forget about what my life is really like, and trying to escape from it all. I have since put on weight and become extremely insecure about my image. I only work casually, and make enough money to get me by each week, but I don't even really have any significant savings whatsoever which I feel plays a major role as to why I still feel depressed.

There are only two people in my life that I can honestly trust with all my heart. My two best friends, one of which I mentioned before and the other I have known for the better part of 17 years. No one else in my life I can look into their eyes and say, I trust you. Not even my own parents, nor my brother.

I was at University this year studying music, much to the annoyance of my parents who believe I am wasting my time and money studying a course that is one of the hardest industries to break into and be successful in. I stopped going halfway through the year but still told my parents that I was going and had passed my exams - which is a lie. I don't know how to handle the situation and I'm afraid of what might happen either way.

There are days where I feel fine, great even, but in a matter of seconds that can completely flip and I can feel like the whole world is crashing down on me. Depression makes you feel so alone, like no one cares for you and that you don't matter. One time it got me down so badly to the point where I had started planning what I was going to say in suicide letters to my closest friends and family. I don't feel as if I'm anywhere near that stage now, but the effects of depression can still hit me almost every day at one point or another. To anyone else out there suffering from depression, I feel your pain and you are not alone. 1 in 8 men suffer from depression at any point in their lives, 1 in 5 suffer from anxiety. Depression is a high risk factor for suicide and, in Australia, there are approximately 2,500 suicides each year. 75% are by men – with an average of 6 men taking their lives every single day. Suicide is the leading cause of death for men under the age of 54, significantly exceeding the national road toll. This is a shocking statistic and I hope everyone out there in the BF world and wider community can feel comfortable talking to someone about their problems. I feel so much better getting all of this off my chest, thank you to anyone who took the time to read all of this, I know it was a lot to read.

 

[Ando727]

I feel like this is as good a platform as any to share my thoughts and feelings, as I don't really feel comfortable talking about it with even my closest friends and family, so maybe here can be an outlet to express my emotions.

Depression has been something that at different times throughout my life has had varying levels of impact, and can hit you like a brick wall at any moment in time without warning. I'm only 21 years old, but ever since I completed my VCE studies for various reasons I have been battling depression. It all started when I got my VCE results and didn't get the ATAR I needed to get me into my course of preference at University. I felt embarrassed whilst all of my friends around me did so well, and here I was without a clue as to what I would now do with my life in terms of furthering my education.

I felt an enormous weight of pressure from my parents especially, and when they found out about my 'failures' in VCE it was as if they stopped caring almost, and didn't have high hopes for me. Their attention automatically turned to my younger brother and has ever since, and I don't feel like I have a strong relationship with them at all. That summer I went away with some friends and became very close with one in particular, in fact I fell in love with her. She was the perfect girl for me, and I still to this day believe she is and I probably shouldn't but do hold out the hope that one day, we'll be together. I don't think I will ever be able to stop loving her. But when I told her how I felt, she didn't feel the same way. Our friendship was almost completely ruined by this and it absolutely drained me emotionally, compounding with the anxiety and embarrassment I had already felt after just leaving school with nothing to look forward to the next year. Eventually things were okay between us and she is my best friend still to this day, although I have to see her with someone else and it slowly makes me a little more devastated every time I see them. Why me? Why have things not gone my way, and what have I done to deserve this?

Before that summer I had never touched alcohol or drugs in my life. By the end of that summer I had consumed such a ridiculous amount of alcohol to try and combat these problems as I felt that by getting myself drunk it was an escape from reality. Whilst the only drug I have ever used is weed, and isn't something I am dependent on the fact that I was now using it to try and relax myself is something that I hate myself for. I probably drink once or twice per week, just going to the local with mates. But I still find myself getting drunk trying to forget about what my life is really like, and trying to escape from it all. I have since put on weight and become extremely insecure about my image. I only work casually, and make enough money to get me by each week, but I don't even really have any significant savings whatsoever which I feel plays a major role as to why I still feel depressed.

There are only two people in my life that I can honestly trust with all my heart. My two best friends, one of which I mentioned before and the other I have known for the better part of 17 years. No one else in my life I can look into their eyes and say, I trust you. Not even my own parents, nor my brother.

I was at University this year studying music, much to the annoyance of my parents who believe I am wasting my time and money studying a course that is one of the hardest industries to break into and be successful in. I stopped going halfway through the year but still told my parents that I was going and had passed my exams - which is a lie. I don't know how to handle the situation and I'm afraid of what might happen either way.

There are days where I feel fine, great even, but in a matter of seconds that can completely flip and I can feel like the whole world is crashing down on me. Depression makes you feel so alone, like no one cares for you and that you don't matter. One time it got me down so badly to the point where I had started planning what I was going to say in suicide letters to my closest friends and family. I don't feel as if I'm anywhere near that stage now, but the effects of depression can still hit me almost every day at one point or another. To anyone else out there suffering from depression, I feel your pain and you are not alone. 1 in 8 men suffer from depression at any point in their lives, 1 in 5 suffer from anxiety. Depression is a high risk factor for suicide and, in Australia, there are approximately 2,500 suicides each year. 75% are by men – with an average of 6 men taking their lives every single day. Suicide is the leading cause of death for men under the age of 54, significantly exceeding the national road toll. This is a shocking statistic and I hope everyone out there in the BF world and wider community can feel comfortable talking to someone about their problems. I feel so much better getting all of this off my chest, thank you to anyone who took the time to read all of this, I know it was a lot to read.

Mate, well done on getting all that off your chest. It's the first skill you're going to need to get yourself out of this - honesty and openness. I think you should take advantage of what our health system has to offer: take yourself to your GP and get a mental health plan done. You will then have access to up to 10 free sessions with an accredited psychologist. Trust me, if you can say what you just said now, you will do great with a good psychologist.

Regarding the girl you like: trust me, we've all been there, mate! There isn't a (straight) guy alive who didn't fall for a girl who didn't return his feelings. The reality is, if those feelings aren't returned, it's because there is something about your compatibility that isn't right. She has realised it, but you haven't yet. Don't hope for things to change - they won't. Don't hope for her relationship to break down and for her to come to her senses - she won't, she'll just find a new guy and you'll have to feel the same thing all over again. If it's hurting you to see her, you might need to take a break until you feel a bit stronger and less intense about her.

But you've already taken the first step: you've opened up about how you're feeling. You can express yourself here whenever you like - there are a lot of great people in this thread who can offer you support. If you want to PM me or anyone else here, I'm sure anyone here would be willing to listen and offer what they can.

Best wishes.

 

[Mootsy]

I feel like this is as good a platform as any to share my thoughts and feelings, as I don't really feel comfortable talking about it with even my closest friends and family, so maybe here can be an outlet to express my emotions.

Depression has been something that at different times throughout my life has had varying levels of impact, and can hit you like a brick wall at any moment in time without warning. I'm only 21 years old, but ever since I completed my VCE studies for various reasons I have been battling depression. It all started when I got my VCE results and didn't get the ATAR I needed to get me into my course of preference at University. I felt embarrassed whilst all of my friends around me did so well, and here I was without a clue as to what I would now do with my life in terms of furthering my education.

I felt an enormous weight of pressure from my parents especially, and when they found out about my 'failures' in VCE it was as if they stopped caring almost, and didn't have high hopes for me. Their attention automatically turned to my younger brother and has ever since, and I don't feel like I have a strong relationship with them at all. That summer I went away with some friends and became very close with one in particular, in fact I fell in love with her. She was the perfect girl for me, and I still to this day believe she is and I probably shouldn't but do hold out the hope that one day, we'll be together. I don't think I will ever be able to stop loving her. But when I told her how I felt, she didn't feel the same way. Our friendship was almost completely ruined by this and it absolutely drained me emotionally, compounding with the anxiety and embarrassment I had already felt after just leaving school with nothing to look forward to the next year. Eventually things were okay between us and she is my best friend still to this day, although I have to see her with someone else and it slowly makes me a little more devastated every time I see them. Why me? Why have things not gone my way, and what have I done to deserve this?

Before that summer I had never touched alcohol or drugs in my life. By the end of that summer I had consumed such a ridiculous amount of alcohol to try and combat these problems as I felt that by getting myself drunk it was an escape from reality. Whilst the only drug I have ever used is weed, and isn't something I am dependent on the fact that I was now using it to try and relax myself is something that I hate myself for. I probably drink once or twice per week, just going to the local with mates. But I still find myself getting drunk trying to forget about what my life is really like, and trying to escape from it all. I have since put on weight and become extremely insecure about my image. I only work casually, and make enough money to get me by each week, but I don't even really have any significant savings whatsoever which I feel plays a major role as to why I still feel depressed.

There are only two people in my life that I can honestly trust with all my heart. My two best friends, one of which I mentioned before and the other I have known for the better part of 17 years. No one else in my life I can look into their eyes and say, I trust you. Not even my own parents, nor my brother.

I was at University this year studying music, much to the annoyance of my parents who believe I am wasting my time and money studying a course that is one of the hardest industries to break into and be successful in. I stopped going halfway through the year but still told my parents that I was going and had passed my exams - which is a lie. I don't know how to handle the situation and I'm afraid of what might happen either way.

There are days where I feel fine, great even, but in a matter of seconds that can completely flip and I can feel like the whole world is crashing down on me. Depression makes you feel so alone, like no one cares for you and that you don't matter. One time it got me down so badly to the point where I had started planning what I was going to say in suicide letters to my closest friends and family. I don't feel as if I'm anywhere near that stage now, but the effects of depression can still hit me almost every day at one point or another. To anyone else out there suffering from depression, I feel your pain and you are not alone. 1 in 8 men suffer from depression at any point in their lives, 1 in 5 suffer from anxiety. Depression is a high risk factor for suicide and, in Australia, there are approximately 2,500 suicides each year. 75% are by men – with an average of 6 men taking their lives every single day. Suicide is the leading cause of death for men under the age of 54, significantly exceeding the national road toll. This is a shocking statistic and I hope everyone out there in the BF world and wider community can feel comfortable talking to someone about their problems. I feel so much better getting all of this off my chest, thank you to anyone who took the time to read all of this, I know it was a lot to read.

I can relate to you and your story about failing studies and even missing classes because of the anxiety..

There is no training on how to handle that pressure at a young age and you are expected to develop a tough skin in school and to make lots of friends, all is meant to go swimmingly...etc..but people are complex.

I haven't really recovered from that over ten years since and struggled with finding a career but have found work in retail/hospitality....

Managed to complete a Diploma in my twenties but have just felt like time has gone so fast since then..

Still struggle to get a word in at parties and friendships, networking as well..

I think it's way easier for those with the right personality, confidence levels, looks to function in modern society etc ..a bit of luck helps as well.

Regarding those statistics, it's not a big surprise, with all the pressure of status these days and the high costs of living and just the pure search for genuine happiness that isn't necessarily about status or money.

 

[The_Wookie]

 

[Geoff_ Miles7]

Just want to say it's great that this thread exists and that people are so supportive, this thread will save lives by at the very least helping people take the first step in talking to someone about their troubles. We live in a completely unnatural age of huge population combined with constant media stimulation which leads to questions about identity and strangely also isolation and less person to person interaction, this mixed with spending the majority of our time in completely unnatural environments naturally leads to depression and anxiety in many people - rather than viewing it necessarily as something being wrong with you individually depression and anxiety should be viewed more IMO as an increasing symptom of the world of loneliness and high stress demands from an increased work load and financial pressures that this generation is experiencing more than any in the last 60 years.

 

[smasha]

We do live in Australia,bully 101.

 

[The_Wookie]

?

 

[Collins-Langford-Ayres]

I copped some weird dude when I went for help, I took my Mrs with me and even she said he needed more help than me lol.

TBH I'd prefer a female shrink.

Me too, not sure why. Struggled to find someone I really gel with though, which everyone says really helps.

 

[The_Wookie]

To all who have participated in this thread since i started it last Christmas, thank you very much for your help and cordial discourse on sensitive matters. I hope this thread has helped folks in need, and informed others.

A reminder,

if you do find yourself in need of assistance or information please dont hesitate to call Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636 or Lifeline on 13 11 14.

 

[astrowizzle]

Thought this article apt for this thread.

https://www.theguardian.com/comment...ife-of-men-youll-be-right-isnt-enough-anymore

My cousin was a dairy farmer as was his dad and his dad. One of the few people I have met that I couldn't get a reading on - something didn't add up. Hung himself in the dairy shed and his 20 year old son found him. Ruined a lot of lives that day very sad

 

[Collins-Langford-Ayres]

My cousin was a dairy farmer as was his dad and his dad. One of the few people I have met that I couldn't get a reading on - something didn't add up. Hung himself in the dairy shed and his 20 year old son found him. Ruined a lot of lives that day very sad

That's such sad news. Just hope more people signal to others their situation than do this.

Let's hope for a positive 2017 for all of those suffering.

 

[smasha]

?

Even driving on a near empty freeway,you will find someone tailgating you.

 

[Greater Gattsby]

Everyone has a breaking point.

You don't have to wait to hit this breaking point, you can seek help regardless of where you are at.

No issue is too small when it comes to talking to someone.

Wishing James Hird a speedy recovery, but more importantly he gets the help, privacy and treatment he requires.