Underrated post.
Mofra's Bottom 50 for 2020
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Mofra
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Player #36 - Bailey Dale
Pictured: Bailey kicks a goal in front of nobody, so it was either during the 2020 season or at a GWS home game
Bailey Dale is a Bulldogforward utility who would be considered a forward if Luke Beveridge played them.
He had a hot streak of kicking 20 goals in six games at the back-end of 2019 which led Bulldog fans into thinking we've finally found an avenue to goal. Unfortunately, 2020 downgraded Bailey from 'avenue' to 'roundabout' and even worse in the second half of the season, 'Arden St'.
2020 hasn't gone to plan at all for Bailey, who is one of three Baileys on the Bulldogs list. Normally you'd only see that much Baileys at an over 50s hens night, but I digress.
Dale managed his lowest game tally since 2016, the greatest year of AFL football ever. His goal output dropped by 2/3rds (7 from 9 games) and he was omitted from the Bulldogs' finals team. He didn't kick multiple goals in any game this year and in his 3 games to start and finish his season managed just two tackles (yes, two tackles out of six games). He doesn't really rack up the ball either - basically, he relies on being fed the ball and kicking miraculous goals from the pocket which is no long term strategy.
He was drafted as an... 18 year old? Wait, is this the face of an 18 year old?
Pictured: Youthful enough to be followed by a Richmond board member on Instagram
Bulldog fans used to joke about Bailey developing into a serious player when he starts puberty. Unfortunately he kind of teases with a good game here or there, then crumbles in any game the opposition turn up the pressure. He averaged 12 touches against bottom 10 sides, and 7.5 touches against top 8 sides.
Fun fact: Bailey has a tattoo on his forearm, with LTMH within each quarter of a cross. In tattoo parlance it generally means "Listen To My Heart" which doesn't even need me to make fun of it. With Libba at the club, you could basically tattoo anything on yourself and it would still look classy by comparison.
Anyway Bailey, good luck next year and welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2020.
Pictured: Bailey kicks a goal in front of nobody, so it was either during the 2020 season or at a GWS home game
Bailey Dale is a Bulldog
He had a hot streak of kicking 20 goals in six games at the back-end of 2019 which led Bulldog fans into thinking we've finally found an avenue to goal. Unfortunately, 2020 downgraded Bailey from 'avenue' to 'roundabout' and even worse in the second half of the season, 'Arden St'.
2020 hasn't gone to plan at all for Bailey, who is one of three Baileys on the Bulldogs list. Normally you'd only see that much Baileys at an over 50s hens night, but I digress.
Dale managed his lowest game tally since 2016, the greatest year of AFL football ever. His goal output dropped by 2/3rds (7 from 9 games) and he was omitted from the Bulldogs' finals team. He didn't kick multiple goals in any game this year and in his 3 games to start and finish his season managed just two tackles (yes, two tackles out of six games). He doesn't really rack up the ball either - basically, he relies on being fed the ball and kicking miraculous goals from the pocket which is no long term strategy.
He was drafted as an... 18 year old? Wait, is this the face of an 18 year old?
Pictured: Youthful enough to be followed by a Richmond board member on Instagram
Bulldog fans used to joke about Bailey developing into a serious player when he starts puberty. Unfortunately he kind of teases with a good game here or there, then crumbles in any game the opposition turn up the pressure. He averaged 12 touches against bottom 10 sides, and 7.5 touches against top 8 sides.
Fun fact: Bailey has a tattoo on his forearm, with LTMH within each quarter of a cross. In tattoo parlance it generally means "Listen To My Heart" which doesn't even need me to make fun of it. With Libba at the club, you could basically tattoo anything on yourself and it would still look classy by comparison.
Anyway Bailey, good luck next year and welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2020.
So i gather he's more delicious than footballer.
Bont2Bruce
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He should have gotten a tattoo of a marshmallow, that would have been more appropriate.
Timewillcome
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Big Roxette fan is he?
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Kicked a goal in 7 games in a row this season did Bailey.
One of only 5 players in the league to do so.
pre-post EDIT: the second part of that is completely made up. Still not bad
One of only 5 players in the league to do so.
pre-post EDIT: the second part of that is completely made up. Still not bad
ferrisb
Brownlow Medallist
I wonder if Lachie Hunter has a 'Joyride' tattoo...
That’s his left forearm, he’s got “Crash! Boom! Bang!” on the right
Mof, you had Sleeping in my Car, Dangerous or Run to You to choose from, you’re better than that.
ITT everyone finds out I love Roxette
Mofra
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Player #35 - Kyle Hartigan
Pictured: The best thing Kyle's ever done on a football field
Kyle Hartigan is a former Adelaide Crows player who turns 29 in a couple of weeks, so of course he's been head-hunted by Hawthorn.
As a tall 'defender', Kyle is tall. He was rookied in his early 20s by Adelaide after years of toil in Werribee and quickly became a mainstay of their defence, although this is a team that loses tall defenders so regularly that anyone willing to stay was likely to get a good run. Basically, their ideal player right now is Julian Assange.
This season, Kyle managed a little over 9 touches a game and two turnovers per game so the Crows really didn't want the ball in his hand. Luckily, he'd rather punch the ball than mark it because, simply, his contested marking is 'homeopathic' to put it nicely.
The ball isn't the only thing Kyle will punch. This season he had a punchy-scuffle with teammate Billy Frampton, which left Kyle with a black eye and Joel Selwood with a free kick somehow. At least someone showed a bit of fight at the Crows this year.
Billy Frampton moved from Port to the Crows at the end of last year so I assume he has the same manager as Adam Treloar and Brayden Pruess.
As both the Crows and Hawks are rebuilding, Kyle will move to the Hawks as a free agent this year to support all of the up and coming young talls Hawthorn have, or will have if they choose to draft some. It's a stunning indictment on modern list management that despite being the wooden spooners, Kyle's move to the Hawks will make both sides better. And younger.
Fun fact: Kyle completed a pre-season at North then trained with Essendon one year, so made it through the Crows pre-season camp with flying colours. He also trekked to Everest base camp one year to raise money for underprivileged kids proving the best South Australians grew up in Victoria.
Kyle, good luck next year on the brown and gold. Welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2020.
Pictured: The best thing Kyle's ever done on a football field
Kyle Hartigan is a former Adelaide Crows player who turns 29 in a couple of weeks, so of course he's been head-hunted by Hawthorn.
As a tall 'defender', Kyle is tall. He was rookied in his early 20s by Adelaide after years of toil in Werribee and quickly became a mainstay of their defence, although this is a team that loses tall defenders so regularly that anyone willing to stay was likely to get a good run. Basically, their ideal player right now is Julian Assange.
This season, Kyle managed a little over 9 touches a game and two turnovers per game so the Crows really didn't want the ball in his hand. Luckily, he'd rather punch the ball than mark it because, simply, his contested marking is 'homeopathic' to put it nicely.
The ball isn't the only thing Kyle will punch. This season he had a punchy-scuffle with teammate Billy Frampton, which left Kyle with a black eye and Joel Selwood with a free kick somehow. At least someone showed a bit of fight at the Crows this year.
Billy Frampton moved from Port to the Crows at the end of last year so I assume he has the same manager as Adam Treloar and Brayden Pruess.
As both the Crows and Hawks are rebuilding, Kyle will move to the Hawks as a free agent this year to support all of the up and coming young talls Hawthorn have, or will have if they choose to draft some. It's a stunning indictment on modern list management that despite being the wooden spooners, Kyle's move to the Hawks will make both sides better. And younger.
Fun fact: Kyle completed a pre-season at North then trained with Essendon one year, so made it through the Crows pre-season camp with flying colours. He also trekked to Everest base camp one year to raise money for underprivileged kids proving the best South Australians grew up in Victoria.
Kyle, good luck next year on the brown and gold. Welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2020.
May as well pre-emptively welcome him to the Bottom 50 for 2021 too
Stunning observation.
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Oh good. This is exactly where I like to come and learn about our new recruits.
Its better not to go into the new season with too many unrealistic expectations.
A Cut Above
🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆 in my lifetime 😁
You're just asking for Plugger to post the clip of Who's Gonna Drive You Home...
leobarryustar
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A11dAtP0w3R
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Way off base with Tomlinson, was a decent player in defense for us this year.
Tom, Oscar and Jones deserve to be much higher than where they were ranked also.
Tom, Oscar and Jones deserve to be much higher than where they were ranked also.
Mofra
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Player #34 - Sam Frost
Pictured: Sam, clearly reminiscing about the time he and a bunch of kids found a pirate map in the 1980s and set off on an adventure
Sam Frost should be an elite footballer. He's tall, really really fast and on field he can hear the coach's instructions. Without a telephone. From 250m away. Through the glass of the coaches box. He's apparently the 3rd fastest player at Hawthorn, although if he pinned his ears back he'd be the first.
Frost started his proper football journey like so many other kids, rejecting GWS' advances to stay in Western Sydney. His first game at GWS was a 95 point loss to Fremantle which is generally a less likely event than a thread on the Bigfooty SRP board descending into rational discussion.
Sam moving to the Demons at the end of 2014 was the impetus for the Demons to chase both Jake Lever and Stephen May for merely a bunch of first round picks and half their salary cap.
Sam was then surplus to requirements and being over 25, the Hawks came knocking. He certainly heard them, and he moved to Hawthorn at the end of last year in a complicated deal that involved Sam Frost and five pick swaps.
Frost is excellent at closing space and to be honest is a pretty decent one on one defender and a defender who can catch and spoil the opposition on a lead. So how the hell does he make this list?
Well, football involves kicking. When you get the ball, you need to make a decision about where to kick it, then execute that skill which is fundamental to football.
Sam does this sometimes. Other times, well, let's just say with Clarko's penchant for plaster-board based violence during outbursts of frustration, Sam Frost has kept about 3% of Australia's plasterers employed during the economic slowdown. The stats say he manages a clanger with 1 in 5 disposals, but given 60% of his disposals are kicks it's likely closer to one in three. Then there's the fluffed long kick to an easy target that become a 'contested' situation that are officially counter as 'efficient' by Champion data hence the old adage - lie, damned lies and Frost's statistics. His decision making is so bad he might be secretly moonlighting as Collingwood's salary cap manager.
Fun fact: He shares the same name with a former reality TV star, which the job title equivalent of a "Hello my name is: In Training" nametag.
Sam, Frosty, good luck next year. I typed this as softly as I could so you couldn't hear what I was writing. Welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2020.
Pictured: Sam, clearly reminiscing about the time he and a bunch of kids found a pirate map in the 1980s and set off on an adventure
Sam Frost should be an elite footballer. He's tall, really really fast and on field he can hear the coach's instructions. Without a telephone. From 250m away. Through the glass of the coaches box. He's apparently the 3rd fastest player at Hawthorn, although if he pinned his ears back he'd be the first.
Frost started his proper football journey like so many other kids, rejecting GWS' advances to stay in Western Sydney. His first game at GWS was a 95 point loss to Fremantle which is generally a less likely event than a thread on the Bigfooty SRP board descending into rational discussion.
Sam moving to the Demons at the end of 2014 was the impetus for the Demons to chase both Jake Lever and Stephen May for merely a bunch of first round picks and half their salary cap.
Sam was then surplus to requirements and being over 25, the Hawks came knocking. He certainly heard them, and he moved to Hawthorn at the end of last year in a complicated deal that involved Sam Frost and five pick swaps.
Frost is excellent at closing space and to be honest is a pretty decent one on one defender and a defender who can catch and spoil the opposition on a lead. So how the hell does he make this list?
Well, football involves kicking. When you get the ball, you need to make a decision about where to kick it, then execute that skill which is fundamental to football.
Sam does this sometimes. Other times, well, let's just say with Clarko's penchant for plaster-board based violence during outbursts of frustration, Sam Frost has kept about 3% of Australia's plasterers employed during the economic slowdown. The stats say he manages a clanger with 1 in 5 disposals, but given 60% of his disposals are kicks it's likely closer to one in three. Then there's the fluffed long kick to an easy target that become a 'contested' situation that are officially counter as 'efficient' by Champion data hence the old adage - lie, damned lies and Frost's statistics. His decision making is so bad he might be secretly moonlighting as Collingwood's salary cap manager.
Fun fact: He shares the same name with a former reality TV star, which the job title equivalent of a "Hello my name is: In Training" nametag.
Sam, Frosty, good luck next year. I typed this as softly as I could so you couldn't hear what I was writing. Welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2020.
Didn't he win on the Batchelor?
After reading that I just feel sorry for poor Sam Frosts career.
Gone from a crap GWS, to a crap Demons, to a crap Hawthorn.
Gone from a crap GWS, to a crap Demons, to a crap Hawthorn.
MAXIMUM GRUNDAGE
Premiership Captain
The ears are so big, he could hear Morganashlee sledging him from the crowd.
