Family & Relationships Describe the most irritating person/a$$hole you know
- Thread starter bresker
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- Mar 25, 2003
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After now hearing of the horrid bus ride to the Shotover I'm now glad I went with the Canyon Swing instead of the rafting.
With the amount of alcohol consumption that takes place in Queenstown your nerves are pretty shot to pieces as well, only heightening the fear.
With the amount of alcohol consumption that takes place in Queenstown your nerves are pretty shot to pieces as well, only heightening the fear.
Doss
Ass
- Aug 1, 2011
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Nah, the exhilaration of the rafting was well worth the scary bus trip and even having to put up with that idiot.
You're not wrong about the alcohol consumption and Queenstown, however.
- Jun 14, 2012
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I had the window seat on that side - legit bruised my gf's leg i was holding on that tight. Well worth it though, loved the rafting
Just recently had a new guy start at work who's probably worked his way into the top 5 most irritating people I've ever met, we'll call him Josh for the purpose of this story. Josh is one of those guys you meet and you immediately know that any conversation you have with them is going to be pointless. Whenever I talk to him you can see that he's paying zero attention to anything you're saying, that little brain of his is just ticking over, waiting to spit out some more trash once I'm finished talking, he has a story for every occasion.
Josh not only is stupid, he looks stupid, picture a 32 year old Jarryd Roughead about a foot shorter, with a head shaped sort of like a blimp. I could just tell he wasn't going to be pleasant to be around once I saw him.
It started with pretty innocent stuff like telling stories which were clearly being exaggerated, but I thought I'd let him off, maybe he was just trying to make a a good impression. The first major strike came during one of his tangents about something irrelevant when he decided to mention that he had a brother who had gone to The University of Melbourne, had recently graduated and has now moved to Sydney to work on the Large Hadron Collider. I questioned him about it to which he replied "yeah, he actually lives in Coffs Harbour because it's nicer but all the work's in Sydney". So I've now established he has a brother (possibly made up) from his bogan Holden t-shirt wearing, Bundy drinking family who has moved to Coffs Harbour and commutes 5 hours to Sydney to work on the large Hadron Collider which he doesn't realise is in Switzerland.
Josh is 32 and is still living at home with his mum, he's got quite a normal shaped body apart from a pretty obvious pot gut, ironically he's always telling me stories about which gym he has a membership at and how much he can deadlift. Josh's mum, obviously seeing this gut, has lately been buying him lean cuisine meals to take to work. He brings these meals to work, which are about $7 a pop? And then thinks its genius and very funny that he throws the meal in the bin, walks to Maccas to buy lunch and then tells his mother that he's been eating them. It's the sort of s**t ten year olds do in primary school, and he thinks he's a modern day genius.
I'm sure I'll have some more tales to come.
Josh not only is stupid, he looks stupid, picture a 32 year old Jarryd Roughead about a foot shorter, with a head shaped sort of like a blimp. I could just tell he wasn't going to be pleasant to be around once I saw him.
It started with pretty innocent stuff like telling stories which were clearly being exaggerated, but I thought I'd let him off, maybe he was just trying to make a a good impression. The first major strike came during one of his tangents about something irrelevant when he decided to mention that he had a brother who had gone to The University of Melbourne, had recently graduated and has now moved to Sydney to work on the Large Hadron Collider. I questioned him about it to which he replied "yeah, he actually lives in Coffs Harbour because it's nicer but all the work's in Sydney". So I've now established he has a brother (possibly made up) from his bogan Holden t-shirt wearing, Bundy drinking family who has moved to Coffs Harbour and commutes 5 hours to Sydney to work on the large Hadron Collider which he doesn't realise is in Switzerland.
Josh is 32 and is still living at home with his mum, he's got quite a normal shaped body apart from a pretty obvious pot gut, ironically he's always telling me stories about which gym he has a membership at and how much he can deadlift. Josh's mum, obviously seeing this gut, has lately been buying him lean cuisine meals to take to work. He brings these meals to work, which are about $7 a pop? And then thinks its genius and very funny that he throws the meal in the bin, walks to Maccas to buy lunch and then tells his mother that he's been eating them. It's the sort of s**t ten year olds do in primary school, and he thinks he's a modern day genius.
I'm sure I'll have some more tales to come.
- Oct 5, 2004
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TAXI!!!
Enjoyed reading this thread for the fifth time 
Could use an update on the current life status of young Miss Boof-in-the-bum
She might be Mrs Boof-in-the-bum
Last edited:
- Sep 2, 2014
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Overheard these guys (think camp hipsters stuck in perpetual puberty) talking LOUDLY before the start of a gig last night.
douche#1 "I just don't understand the whole Pete Evans thing, I mean it's sooo obvious he has a motive for pushing his paleo bullsh!t"
douche#2 "Yeah I know, like I was going to go vegetarian a few months back, not for any ideological reasons but I just you know like vegetables more than i like meat"
#1 "oh really? That's crazy"
#2 "yeah but I went and saw my doctor and he was like why do you want to? So i said I like vegetables more than meat and he asked if I eat any meat and I was like well yeah, you can't beat a perfectly cooked steak so I eat steak a bit"
#1 "yeah good steak is unbeatable isn't it?"
#2 "I love a good cooked steak, it's probably my fave"
#1 "totes"
SHUT THE F*CK UP!!!
douche#1 "I just don't understand the whole Pete Evans thing, I mean it's sooo obvious he has a motive for pushing his paleo bullsh!t"
douche#2 "Yeah I know, like I was going to go vegetarian a few months back, not for any ideological reasons but I just you know like vegetables more than i like meat"
#1 "oh really? That's crazy"
#2 "yeah but I went and saw my doctor and he was like why do you want to? So i said I like vegetables more than meat and he asked if I eat any meat and I was like well yeah, you can't beat a perfectly cooked steak so I eat steak a bit"
#1 "yeah good steak is unbeatable isn't it?"
#2 "I love a good cooked steak, it's probably my fave"
#1 "totes"
SHUT THE F*CK UP!!!
Hudu Gurusingha
Cancelled
- Jul 11, 2014
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Ms Facebook Mumma
Dani spent 9 months slow cooking a little bundle of Facebook irritation. Her little angel’s day of birth marked the happiest day of her life, and the day she became an ISIS-grade Facebook terrorist. “Dani added a new life event: had a child”. An ominous prelude to the tidal wave of baby s**t that was going to smear your social media Huggies.
Dani’s baby related Facebook carpet-bombing started off as a light assault on your care levels. A few posts a week showing her precious angel rolling around and acting disturbingly similar to how you conduct yourself while in the grips of some heinous hangover. This was the infant calm before the baby storm. On a bleak Friday afternoon Dani loses her ******* mind and posts a picture of her little munchkin's s**t stained nappy, “Oops little bubba made a mess haha xoxo #blessed”. Lord have mercy.
Everyone elses childling is a bald headed little piss pot, but Dani’s bubba is a supermodel, actor and comedian all rolled into one ray of sunshine that insists on glaring out your eyeballs while you try to drive down the road of patience. After the s**t-gate incident, Dani tones it down a bit and posts a video of her sprog crying like a teenage girl at Justin Beiber’s coming out party, “oh mr grumpy bum is grumpy! haha xoxox #NewBornThingz”. Watching the video is as enjoyable as having breaky with your Tinder date’s family after a night of un-lubricated love making.
Months bang on and Dani’s Facebook posts starts to turn sinister, “LISTEN, whether I vaccinate my child is MY CHOICE and anyone who says otherwise can suck eggs - feeling angry ”. It is unclear whether the update was born in the pits of self righteousness or plain ignorance, nevertheless, Dani has read some articles and by virtue of procreation is an expert on the subject. She argues mercilessly with everyone who comments on her post. Turns out churning out a placenta is tantamount to education these days.
The winds of temperament change as fast as they gust, and within 2 hours Dani is back to sharing "totes hilar" baby memes from the cutest bowels of Facebook. If you want to experience the pains of childbirth, reading Dani’s page is a good start.
Dani spent 9 months slow cooking a little bundle of Facebook irritation. Her little angel’s day of birth marked the happiest day of her life, and the day she became an ISIS-grade Facebook terrorist. “Dani added a new life event: had a child”. An ominous prelude to the tidal wave of baby s**t that was going to smear your social media Huggies.
Dani’s baby related Facebook carpet-bombing started off as a light assault on your care levels. A few posts a week showing her precious angel rolling around and acting disturbingly similar to how you conduct yourself while in the grips of some heinous hangover. This was the infant calm before the baby storm. On a bleak Friday afternoon Dani loses her ******* mind and posts a picture of her little munchkin's s**t stained nappy, “Oops little bubba made a mess haha xoxo #blessed”. Lord have mercy.
Everyone elses childling is a bald headed little piss pot, but Dani’s bubba is a supermodel, actor and comedian all rolled into one ray of sunshine that insists on glaring out your eyeballs while you try to drive down the road of patience. After the s**t-gate incident, Dani tones it down a bit and posts a video of her sprog crying like a teenage girl at Justin Beiber’s coming out party, “oh mr grumpy bum is grumpy! haha xoxox #NewBornThingz”. Watching the video is as enjoyable as having breaky with your Tinder date’s family after a night of un-lubricated love making.
Months bang on and Dani’s Facebook posts starts to turn sinister, “LISTEN, whether I vaccinate my child is MY CHOICE and anyone who says otherwise can suck eggs - feeling angry
”. It is unclear whether the update was born in the pits of self righteousness or plain ignorance, nevertheless, Dani has read some articles and by virtue of procreation is an expert on the subject. She argues mercilessly with everyone who comments on her post. Turns out churning out a placenta is tantamount to education these days.The winds of temperament change as fast as they gust, and within 2 hours Dani is back to sharing "totes hilar" baby memes from the cutest bowels of Facebook. If you want to experience the pains of childbirth, reading Dani’s page is a good start.
- Sep 2, 2014
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Hudu Gurusingha do you have children? If you don't I don't think you can judge a parent.
One day you'll understand just how much it changes you and gives meaning to your life to hold something so precious that you'll want to share everything about it to the world. It's love at its purest.
Just messing with you, what a campaigner.
One day you'll understand just how much it changes you and gives meaning to your life to hold something so precious that you'll want to share everything about it to the world. It's love at its purest.
Just messing with you, what a campaigner.
Hudu Gurusingha
Cancelled
- Jul 11, 2014
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Ms Dickhead Mother
Sandra angrily storms into Dome dressed in the official uniform of the wife that hasn’t sucked a dick in 8 years: loose denim carpi pants, a plain shirt and a super practical pair of New Balance sneakers. Sandra has no time for MILF’y fashion pursuits, she is the CEO of the hardest job in the ******* world: raising kids who are more spoiled than the carton of milk that Kyle Sandilands bought in anticipation for a Cleo Bachelor of the Year nomination.
Within minutes, Sandra is berating a staff member at full volume, “what do you mean I have to pay for a babycino? Look my daughter is crying now! My daughter is crying, my daughter is crying!!!” The poor girl cops the narcissistic rage of a dickhead that believes the passing of a placenta gives her the right to stamp out the cigarette of entitlement on the face of society. “FedUp Perth will be hearing about this! Come on darlings we’re going!”.
She refuses to concede any footpath space as she forces a young couple to step onto the grass to avoid her precious entourage. She shoots them an early-menopausal bitch-stare that conveys her sinister thoughts, “how dare you find it inconvenient to move FOR MY DARLING CHILDREN!”. She continues to stampede away from Dome like a bull-dyke that just spotted a Spaniard wielding a raging boner like a spear.
She walks to her Tarago which is parked in a busy car park. She spends 5 minutes loading her screaming brats into her car and then makes an obnoxious phone call to her day-time television campaigner of a friend. A lad who had been waiting patiently for her finally honks his horn. She boils over like a hormonal pot of pasta and storms towards the man like a tampon-tornado. “HOW DARE YOU!!! Now my babies are crying!! You pig!!!”
Hours later, Sandra is having lunch with her bestie. She talks endlessly about her precious little George while he demonstrates just how special he is by running around the eatery and destroying the serenity. A suited man leans over, “sorry lady, could you look after your kid? We’re trying to have a business chat?” Uh-oh…
Needless to say, the eatery is treated to a full blown bitch-Opera followed up an un-requested psychotic-encore by the mayor of dickheadsville.
- Apr 18, 2014
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- #316
All while the old man is slaving his guts out at work so the fat moll can roam around in a brand new four wheel drive, spoil her c*** children rotten at the shops and hang around in the school ground with the mothers club talking s**t and gossiping.Ms Dickhead Mother
Sandra angrily storms into Dome dressed in the official uniform of the wife that hasn’t sucked a dick in 8 years: loose denim carpi pants, a plain shirt and a super practical pair of New Balance sneakers. Sandra has no time for MILF’y fashion pursuits, she is the CEO of the hardest job in the ******* world: raising kids who are more spoiled than the carton of milk that Kyle Sandilands bought in anticipation for a Cleo Bachelor of the Year nomination.
Within minutes, Sandra is berating a staff member at full volume, “what do you mean I have to pay for a babycino? Look my daughter is crying now! My daughter is crying, my daughter is crying!!!” The poor girl cops the narcissistic rage of a dickhead that believes the passing of a placenta gives her the right to stamp out the cigarette of entitlement on the face of society. “FedUp Perth will be hearing about this! Come on darlings we’re going!”.
She refuses to concede any footpath space as she forces a young couple to step onto the grass to avoid her precious entourage. She shoots them an early-menopausal bitch-stare that conveys her sinister thoughts, “how dare you find it inconvenient to move FOR MY DARLING CHILDREN!”. She continues to stampede away from Dome like a bull-dyke that just spotted a Spaniard wielding a raging boner like a spear.
She walks to her Tarago which is parked in a busy car park. She spends 5 minutes loading her screaming brats into her car and then makes an obnoxious phone call to her day-time television campaigner of a friend. A lad who had been waiting patiently for her finally honks his horn. She boils over like a hormonal pot of pasta and storms towards the man like a tampon-tornado. “HOW DARE YOU!!! Now my babies are crying!! You pig!!!”
Hours later, Sandra is having lunch with her bestie. She talks endlessly about her precious little George while he demonstrates just how special he is by running around the eatery and destroying the serenity. A suited man leans over, “sorry lady, could you look after your kid? We’re trying to have a business chat?” Uh-oh…
Needless to say, the eatery is treated to a full blown bitch-Opera followed up an un-requested psychotic-encore by the mayor of dickheadsville.
Never seen such a self-entitled pack of c***s like these mothers. And should've swallowed the little s**t they call their "darling angel" child. F*** off.
Not Hudu, this guy on fb
https://www.facebook.com/TheBellTowerTimes
Although if BTT was actually Hudu I think my head would explode
More likely Miss Bun-in-the-oven. Surely she doesn't take the "up the bum, no babies" option every time. For a start she doesn't seem bright enough.
So today I got home to find a letter in the mail that wasn't a bill or advertising, what a lovely surprise I thought as I opened it up. Untill...
Here's what I got;
-Derryn the boyfriend recently proposed (apparently over the phone while drunk)
-Boof has 3 new tatts since I last saw her one of which is a Fremantle Dockers logo and another is the outline of Italy (she has zero Italian blood but her fiancee has relatives there)
-Boof is currently with child, about 3 months in.
-Boof's father (The dodgy builder) ran as a liberal in W.A and was soundly trounced.
And sadly that's all I have.
'You are invited to the 5th birthday of Nadasha Jayde [name redacted]'
-Place: Generic s**t-hole hotel in W.A-
-Theme: Fairytale-
Here's my favourite part-Theme: Fairytale-
-Finger food and soft drinks will be provided after paying a $50 dollar denation (sic) on entry-
So aside from feeling incredibly old that Nadasha is 5, and being confused about how the brood got my new address, I thought of this thread and decided to call one of my more human W.A cousins for some story time.
Here's what I got;
-Derryn the boyfriend recently proposed (apparently over the phone while drunk)
-Boof has 3 new tatts since I last saw her one of which is a Fremantle Dockers logo and another is the outline of Italy (she has zero Italian blood but her fiancee has relatives there)
-Boof is currently with child, about 3 months in.
-Boof's father (The dodgy builder) ran as a liberal in W.A and was soundly trounced.
And sadly that's all I have.
TubbsFarquhar
TheBrownDog
This thread needs the Certified Legendary tag. Taxi! And her middle name being JaYde just adds to it.
the fly
mmmm, erotic cakes
I second that motion.
TubbsFarquhar
TheBrownDog
Donald! Clean bowled!
Yasss love this thread
Moar!!
