- Mar 16, 2014
- 8,524
- 8,666
- AFL Club
- Collingwood
I suggested last week that GWS would provide us with a pretty relaxed game of dwarf-tossing. They were dwarfs rather than giants, I wrote, and so it proved to be. The nice thing was it allowed us to get back to the devastating style of game of the start of our season. Nice. Cox’s performance was superlative – he was the real giant – and I have confidence he can be consistently good. A quick mention for De Goey: the focus on Nick Daicos has let Jordy fly under the radar. And by fly, I mean smash, bullock, devastate, break clear of the contest, drive missiles into the enemy territory. He has finally become the player he’s threatened to become.
I don’t expect any changes this week, unless injury strikes. I don’t go with the idea of bringing in Cameron. Who makes way for him? Johnson? That would be crazy. Maybe McInnis or Ginnivan, who didn’t play well against the giants. I wouldn’t do it, but I can see the argument for it.
The Evil Enemy: The Blues
Look, let’s not sugar coat things. The blues are up there with war-criminals in the moral order of the universe. I believe in redemption for everyone, and what this looks like is: them disbanding the club, tearing down Princes Park, sowing salt into the ground so evil can never again spring up, apologising to everyone, and asking for their song to be banned in public. Personally, I want apologies for: 1. Johnson extracting the ball from the centre one lonely day in the 1980s, as I listened to the radio as a kid, devastated that we were losing. 2. Salary cap cheating. 3. Giving Judd an “ambassador” role or whatever it was as a way of …. salary cap cheating. 4. Their recent presidents, odious every one of them. 5. The stolen grand finals, more unethical acts in a career of moral degeneracy. 6. Jack Silvagni’s head.
Now that we have set the record straight, we can take great joy in their current plight. And I do. Their “twin towers” aren’t clicking. Harry MacKay thinks the football is a balloon, and his kicks go everywhere. Their captain is slogging his way through, unable to reach the heights of recent years. They have a bunch or hard-at-it battlers, whose skills are mediocre. They have no real small forwards that are making an impact. Only Saad gives them zip from the backline – stop him and they’re stagnant. They’re missing Williams and Martin, two players they stole from other clubs and who give them the run and class they need. All in all, they’re struggling.
But they should be making finals, because they do actually have the talent on their list.
The Washup
Expect the Blues to put up a good fight. If they can click, they’ll be dangerous. Charlie Curnow is the biggest danger, and Jeremy Howe would usually go with him. Murphy is too slow and Moore is better suited to Harry McKay. The injuries to our talls might hurt us this week. But if our midfield does its job, we can survive this.
We’ll have to shut Saad down and watch McGovern’s intercepts and Walsh’s run.
But we will beat them in the midfield – match them for hardball and scythe through them when the ball is on the outside. And our game plan and execution are just better than theirs. They stutter and halt and have crises of moral conscience about all the evil they have done; we flow and glide and devastate with the freedom and joy of the righteous.
If there is a God in this universe, we will crush them until they begin to see their ethical emptiness, their moral turpitude.
This is a crusade, a religious war – let the mighty Magpies prevail.
The Pies by 23 points! In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen.
I don’t expect any changes this week, unless injury strikes. I don’t go with the idea of bringing in Cameron. Who makes way for him? Johnson? That would be crazy. Maybe McInnis or Ginnivan, who didn’t play well against the giants. I wouldn’t do it, but I can see the argument for it.
The Evil Enemy: The Blues
Look, let’s not sugar coat things. The blues are up there with war-criminals in the moral order of the universe. I believe in redemption for everyone, and what this looks like is: them disbanding the club, tearing down Princes Park, sowing salt into the ground so evil can never again spring up, apologising to everyone, and asking for their song to be banned in public. Personally, I want apologies for: 1. Johnson extracting the ball from the centre one lonely day in the 1980s, as I listened to the radio as a kid, devastated that we were losing. 2. Salary cap cheating. 3. Giving Judd an “ambassador” role or whatever it was as a way of …. salary cap cheating. 4. Their recent presidents, odious every one of them. 5. The stolen grand finals, more unethical acts in a career of moral degeneracy. 6. Jack Silvagni’s head.
Now that we have set the record straight, we can take great joy in their current plight. And I do. Their “twin towers” aren’t clicking. Harry MacKay thinks the football is a balloon, and his kicks go everywhere. Their captain is slogging his way through, unable to reach the heights of recent years. They have a bunch or hard-at-it battlers, whose skills are mediocre. They have no real small forwards that are making an impact. Only Saad gives them zip from the backline – stop him and they’re stagnant. They’re missing Williams and Martin, two players they stole from other clubs and who give them the run and class they need. All in all, they’re struggling.
But they should be making finals, because they do actually have the talent on their list.
The Washup
Expect the Blues to put up a good fight. If they can click, they’ll be dangerous. Charlie Curnow is the biggest danger, and Jeremy Howe would usually go with him. Murphy is too slow and Moore is better suited to Harry McKay. The injuries to our talls might hurt us this week. But if our midfield does its job, we can survive this.
We’ll have to shut Saad down and watch McGovern’s intercepts and Walsh’s run.
But we will beat them in the midfield – match them for hardball and scythe through them when the ball is on the outside. And our game plan and execution are just better than theirs. They stutter and halt and have crises of moral conscience about all the evil they have done; we flow and glide and devastate with the freedom and joy of the righteous.
If there is a God in this universe, we will crush them until they begin to see their ethical emptiness, their moral turpitude.
This is a crusade, a religious war – let the mighty Magpies prevail.
The Pies by 23 points! In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen.
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