Certified Legendary Thread The Cut

[Klyntonius]

Coach Goodwin, I'd like to ask you a few question. One, where are the wins and two, give us some wins.

 

[A11dAtP0w3R]

It's always exciting when I see this thread get bumped, wasn't disappointed.

 

[A11dAtP0w3R]

Perty: Ah not a problem in sight, the succession plan has worked like a charm

Goody: That's specious reasoning Gary

Perty: Thank you Goody <pats him on head>

Goody: By your logic I could claim I'm our next premiership coach

Perty: Errr, how so?

Goody: I'm not

Perty: Ah ha

Goody: I can't coach for shit

Perty: Ah ha

Goody: But I made a preliminary final in my first year coaching, how many other coaches have done that for the MFC since 1998?

Perty: Simon, id like to offer you a 4 year extension

Goody <shakes head>

Perty <pulls out club cheque book>

Goody <shrugs shoulders, accepts cheque>

 

[Bluelegs]

View attachment 907538


Perty: Ah not a problem in sight, the succession plan has worked like a charm

Goody: The specious reasoning Gary

Perty: Thank you Goody <pats him on head>

Goody: By your logic I could claim I'm our next premiership coach

Perty: Errr, how so?

Goody: I'm not

Perty: Ah ha

Goody: I can't coach for sh*t

Perty: Ah ha

Goody: But I made a preliminary final in my first year coaching, how many other coaches have done that for the MFC since 1998?

Perty: Simon, id like to offer you a 4 year extension

Goody <shakes head>

Perty <pulls out club cheque book>

Goody <shrugs shoulders, accepts cheque>

On an unrelated note. Recently I've been thinking the Bear Patrol is very analogous of the COVID Safe app.

 

[MAXIMUM GRUNDAGE]

Alan Richardson: Don't worry Goody. I rounded up our less gifted players and led them into the forward line.
Jake Melksham: "Tom, why are we down here?"
Tom McDonald: "Jeez, I told you Jakey, to kick goals"
Jayden Hunt: "Buuuuut whyyyyy?"
Tom McDonald: "You guys are pathetic! No wonder Goody made me the head forward guy!"

*Ball comes in. Tom attempts to mark and spills the ball. Richmond defenders pick up the ball and run it straight out of our forward 50*

Melksham (pointing): "The ball's getting away"
Hunt (dropping head): "Awwwwww, we did baaaaaad!"

 

[djpaulydemon]

Curse the man who founded the Melbourne Football Club and wrote the first laws of Australian Rules Football! Curse Thomas Wentworth Wills!

 

[Klyntonius]

 

[MAXIMUM GRUNDAGE]

View attachment 907846

It's the players who are wrong.

But it feels like we're on one of Brett Kirk's journeys of learning.

 

[Johnny Karate]

“Simon, we’ve lost 6 of our last 27 in largely the same way. How do we fix it?”

Goody: “contested ball, stupid”.

 

[Headless]

Bless this thread.

 

[Johnny Karate]

Petracca: Oh Coach Goodwin can you teach me all the game plans?

Goodwin: Well, there’s contested ball, play on at all costs and that premiership looking thing is play on at all costs, contested ball.

Petracca: Oh Coach Goodwin you are so learned!

Goodwin: Hehe. It’s called learnings, son, learnings.

Petracca: Oh Coach Goodwin! I love you!

Goodwin: I love you too, Peptide.

Petracca: It’s Petracca.

 

[TheDarkDwarf]

Behold Mighty Goodwinius in all his Glory!

Goodwinius
Demons

Perty
Peace, ho! Goodwinius speaks.

Goodwinius
Demons!

Demons
We hear you, oh Lord.

Goodwinius
Stand you directly in Petraccus’ way,
When he doth run around Gosch’s paddock, Petraccus!

Petraccus
Goodwinius, my lord.

Goodwinius
Forget not, in your speed, Petraccus,
And be sure to touch the other Demons; for our learnings tell us,
The losers, touched in this holy chase,
Shall shake off their terrible curse.

Mahoney
We shall remember:
When Goodwinius says follow the plan it is performed.

Goodwinius
Proceed, and leave no person out.
[The Trumpeter appears]

The Supporters
Goodwinius!

Goodwinius
Ha! Who calls?

Roosius
Bid every noise be still. Peace yet again!

Goodwinius
Who is it in the crowd that calls on me?
I hear a tongue, shriller than all the music,
Cry 'Goodwinius!' Speak. Goodwinius is turned to hear.

The Supporters
Beware the Final Siren.

Goodwinius
Who are these people?

Brutus Yzeius
The supporter’s bid you beware the Final siren.

Goodwinius
They know nothing of our learnings, tell them to be on their way. .

 

[schmuttt]

 

[stEdy]

"Learnings, son, learnings" really spoke to me.

Such a good thread

 

[Dancing Potato]

 

[PerfectFooty]

I swear sometimes being mediocre is more entertaining than actually being good

 

[Dory_77]

I swear sometimes being mediocre is more entertaining than actually being good

Sadly I think even mediocre is beyond us at the moment.

 

[mrmonkey]

Pert : [on phone to the board] Okay, this is what you're gonna do. You're gonna hang up, call me back, and say the exact opposite of everything you just said. Goodbye.

[hangs up]

Pert: Trac, gawny, come over here.

Gawny : What is it, Unkie Pert?

Pert : I want you to hear what the guys on the board think of your coach.

[phone rings]

Herb : Hello?

Board member: Um, Simon Goodwin is a... brilliant man with lots of well thought-out, practical, ideas for game plans and selection. He is insuring the sustained success of this club for years to come. Oh yes, and his personal hygiene is above reproach.

 

[Jamurp]

This thread is therapeutic.

 

[Topkent]

Melbourne losing is awesome, this board is way better. Too bad we have to actually watch the games

 

[TheCount]

Thanks guys .... I needed this ...

 

[mrmonkey]

For the record the last bit probably is probably true. Simon probably does have perfect hygiene especially in covid times.

 

[00Stinger]

 

[00Stinger]

 

[mrmonkey]

Reporters at a press conference see Goodwin and Richo painting Charlie Spargo to look like Weideman.

Robbo: hey goody why don't you just select the real weideman?

Goodwin: Weideman doesn't look like Weideman on t.v so you have to use a Spargo.

Stevo: What do you do if you want to select Spargo.

Goodwin: usually we just tape a bunch of footballs together.