Certified Legendary Thread The Cut

[Klyntonius]

 

[A11dAtP0w3R]

Some absolutely fantastic contributions of late. Well done to all.

 

[djpaulydemon]

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This is perfection.

 

[Dory_77]

T. McDonald: we do have a forward coach, don't we Perty?
Pert: Josh, tell Tom what you got when I sent you to town to get a forwards coach.
Mahoney: Curse you magic beans!
Pert: Stop blaming the beans!

 

[Charlie_s123]

Pert: Goody, this gameplan isn't working. I really think you should throw it away.
Goody: Suggestion noted.

28 losses later ...

Goody: Gary, I'd like to be alone with the gameplan for a moment.
Pert: Are you going to use it again?
Goody: [pause] Yes.

 

[Topkent]

View attachment 909625

Pert: Goody, this gameplan isn't working. I really think you should throw it away.
Goody: Suggestion noted.

28 losses later ...

Goody: Gary, I'd like to be alone with the gameplan for a moment.
Pert: Are you going to use it again?
Goody: [pause] Yes.

An then goody picking up the game plan from the trash can before Rossy Lyon slaps it back in

 

[Charlie_s123]

An then goody picking up the game plan from the trash can before Rossy Lyon slaps it back in

Goody looks at the game plan ‘how could I stay mad at you’

 

[mrmonkey]

This pretty much sums up our forward 50 entries.

 

[Klyntonius]

Gillon McLachlan, counting the team logos on a poster.

McLachlan: “...16, 17, 18. Poster’s up to date. Very good, Mark. Now, are these coaches as smart as they look?”

Mark Brayshaw: “Well, let’s pick one at random. Hmm, how ‘bout that one?” Points at Alastair Clarkson .

McLachlan: Looking at Simon Goodwin. “You mean this coach here?”

Brayshaw: “NO! No. Alastair Clarkson.”

McLachlan: “What are the key elements of a successful gameplan?”

Clarkson: “A balance between defence and attack brought together with skill and toughness.”

McLachlan: “First rate.”

Goodwin: “What’s a gameplan?”

Brayshaw: Laughs loudly and rubs Goodwin’s head. “Let’s go.”

McLachlan: “Did that coach say, ‘What’s a gameplan?’”

Brayshaw: “No, he said ‘What’s the laid plans?’ It’s about the post meeting drinks.”

McLachlan: “Hmmm. It sounded like gameplan.”

Brayshaw: “I’ve had a cold, so I...”

McLachlan: “Oh, so you would hear laid as game?”

Brayshaw: “Yes.”

McLachlan: “I understand.”

 

[Dory_77]

Fans: The forwards look unhappy.
Goodwin: add more contested balls.

 

[mrmonkey]

Learnings....

 

[00Stinger]

Goodwin: Players, the times they are a-becoming quite different. Scoring is at an all-time low, so I've come up with these scoring alerts. (holds a stack of cards) You will receive one as soon as your performance in goal scoring starts to slip in any area. This way your manager won't have to wait until trade time to punish you.
Salem: How innovative. I like it!
Viney: Hey VandenBerg, take a memo on your ipad: beat up Salem. (VandenBerg writes "Beat up Salem" which the ipad translates the words as "Eat up salami") Bah! (throws ipad at Salem)
Salem: Ow!
Goodwin: (Announcing to players in auditorium) Alright, first performance alert. Bennell, Harley.
Bennell: I kicked 4 last week, I won, I won! (Bennell happily walks up to receive one)
Goodwin: No, no, Harley. This means you're not applying enough defensive pressure and will play in the 2's this week.
Bennell: Me fail to tackle? That's unpossible!

 

[mrmonkey]

Goodwin and Richo reviewing the midfielders.

Richo: Viney's composure is up a little this week. But Petracca's is way down.
Goodwin: We always have one good midfielder and one lousy mudfielder. Why can't both our midfielders be good?
Richo: We have three midfielders, Goody.
Goodwin: Richo, Brayshaw doesn't count as a midfielder!
Richo: No, I mean Oliver!
Goodwin: oh that guy.

 

[Bluelegs]

Richardson and Goodwin review the final moments of the game against Brisbane.

Richardson: Hannan bombed the football to Fritsch in the pocket, kicking it out on the full and Fritsch held up the play, giving away a 50 metre penalty, which allowed Brisbane to kick to McStay in the forward 50, who ran out the clock so Brisbane could win the game.

Goodwin: Yes, that's a real pickle. Would you excuse me for a moment?

Goodwin: [Incomprehensible yelling]

Goodwin: All right, I have thought this through. I will fly back to Melbourne with Bailey. Then I will murder him.

 

[Klyntonius]

 

[djpaulydemon]

Goody: Don't worry, Melbourne Supporters. I have a fool proof strategy to get us out of here: Inside midfielders, each more inside than the last. I tell you, the AFL won't know what hit em!

 

[Dancing Potato]

 

[Topkent]

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Magnificent

 

[Crimson Azure]

 

[mrmonkey]

First day working from home so I did this.

 

[CTHORANGE]

Gold!

 

[Crimson Azure]

 

[mrmonkey]

Somewhere in a brewery in Collingwood on a Saturday afternoon, a Melbourne supporter tries a boutique beer before heading to the MCG.

Melbourne supporter: There's something about this midfield beer that isn't quite right, but I can't put my finger on it.

Meanwhile in the brewing section...



Simon Goodwin taste the beer and says: Needs more Inside mids.

 

[A11dAtP0w3R]

First day working from home so I did this.

View attachment 927844

The look on Goody's face in this is perfect.

 

[Crimson Azure]