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Proper Gander

Owl whisperer and secret agent
Feb 15, 2015
16,310
26,799
Port Melbourne
AFL Club
Melbourne
Other Teams
Mt Buller Demons
I still have symptoms of post traumatic shock. I’m so annoyed because I thought I was over it and I was even a bit proud of myself for recovering after being caught up in an horrific event a few years back.

This morning I was on a train packed to sardines that slowed to a crawl, took 20 minutes to get half a kilometre, then stopped dead in a tunnel in the city circle. No announcement about why it stopped. The thing didn’t move for 15 minutes. My heart rate was at something crazy and I was sweating like crazy. Then all the lights went out. I honestly thought I was dying for a bit there.

Of course I was safe and nothing happened but the adrenaline in my body doesn’t seem to listen to reason. Im so so pi**ed off to find I can’t shake this. Im also so exhausted after a day of feeling freaked out but I still struggle getting to sleep because my mind is racing again. I wish my moods could be stable. Im so freaking tired.
 

Buzz Hawk

Club Legend
Jul 23, 2017
1,542
2,319
Buttox
AFL Club
Hawthorn
I still have symptoms of post traumatic shock. I’m so annoyed because I thought I was over it and I was even a bit proud of myself for recovering after being caught up in an horrific event a few years back.

This morning I was on a train packed to sardines that slowed to a crawl, took 20 minutes to get half a kilometre, then stopped dead in a tunnel in the city circle. No announcement about why it stopped. The thing didn’t move for 15 minutes. My heart rate was at something crazy and I was sweating like crazy. Then all the lights went out. I honestly thought I was dying for a bit there.

Of course I was safe and nothing happened but the adrenaline in my body doesn’t seem to listen to reason. Im so so pi**ed off to find I can’t shake this. Im also so exhausted after a day of feeling freaked out but I still struggle getting to sleep because my mind is racing again. I wish my moods could be stable. Im so freaking tired.
It takes time.
Allow yourself that time and don’t be so hard on yourself.
Acknowledge it, yes it’s happening, my mind is racing, again, but I know this feeling and I will get through it.
And you will. Believe that.
 

Ando727

Norm Smith Medallist
Dec 12, 2009
5,753
11,707
Hobart
AFL Club
Melbourne
I still have symptoms of post traumatic shock. I’m so annoyed because I thought I was over it and I was even a bit proud of myself for recovering after being caught up in an horrific event a few years back.

This morning I was on a train packed to sardines that slowed to a crawl, took 20 minutes to get half a kilometre, then stopped dead in a tunnel in the city circle. No announcement about why it stopped. The thing didn’t move for 15 minutes. My heart rate was at something crazy and I was sweating like crazy. Then all the lights went out. I honestly thought I was dying for a bit there.

Of course I was safe and nothing happened but the adrenaline in my body doesn’t seem to listen to reason. Im so so pi**ed off to find I can’t shake this. Im also so exhausted after a day of feeling freaked out but I still struggle getting to sleep because my mind is racing again. I wish my moods could be stable. Im so freaking tired.
PTSD is a real thing, no doubt. It can resurface at the most random times - even when the overall trajectory is positive. Don't be hard on yourself about it. It's not that you have or haven't done something. You probably can't stop it entirely from happening once in a while. That's the problem with the brain - it actually has a routine of spontaneously firing neurones to maintain synapses and functioning. Unfortunately that can mean triggering memories and emotions we'd rather forget. It sucks, but it's unlikely to keep happening. You put in the hard work to recover, and if you keep doing the things that you know are good for you, you'll be ok. Just keep in mind that these things can resurface occasionally and be prepared for that possibility. You still have every right to feel proud of yourself - so give yourself a break, ok?
 

mxett

Brownlow Medallist
Jul 1, 2007
23,934
9,423
Melbourne
AFL Club
Essendon
The death of Danny Frawley really affected me, just empathising with the situation it’s stirred me up alittle.
Just wanted to throw this down while I’m trying to think my way through how I’m feeling.
you're not alone, it has really affected me too. Stay strong friend, we are all here to support each other
 

mxett

Brownlow Medallist
Jul 1, 2007
23,934
9,423
Melbourne
AFL Club
Essendon
I still have symptoms of post traumatic shock. I’m so annoyed because I thought I was over it and I was even a bit proud of myself for recovering after being caught up in an horrific event a few years back.

This morning I was on a train packed to sardines that slowed to a crawl, took 20 minutes to get half a kilometre, then stopped dead in a tunnel in the city circle. No announcement about why it stopped. The thing didn’t move for 15 minutes. My heart rate was at something crazy and I was sweating like crazy. Then all the lights went out. I honestly thought I was dying for a bit there.

Of course I was safe and nothing happened but the adrenaline in my body doesn’t seem to listen to reason. Im so so pi**ed off to find I can’t shake this. Im also so exhausted after a day of feeling freaked out but I still struggle getting to sleep because my mind is racing again. I wish my moods could be stable. Im so freaking tired.
I hear you, so annoying when your body and mind just take off like that. You know exactly what is happening and that you are really safe, but it just does it's own thing. Things will improve again though, setbacks are very normal. You will get stronger when you pass each one
 

Ando727

Norm Smith Medallist
Dec 12, 2009
5,753
11,707
Hobart
AFL Club
Melbourne
Well I did it. Seeing a psych next week.

Can’t get over the nagging feeling that life isn’t right despite having it all. And it’s really getting to me.
Good luck mate. It's a courageous thing you're doing. It's all about getting to know yourself better. We often have poor insight into our own functioning. Getting some more objective eyes on the situation can help a lot.
 

mxett

Brownlow Medallist
Jul 1, 2007
23,934
9,423
Melbourne
AFL Club
Essendon
“The road leading up to last Monday’s events began eight months ago when Danny made the decision to take himself off his prescribed medication. At this point Danny felt invincible, like the true competitor and proud man that he was; he felt that he had beaten the disease.

“In fact, he felt bullet proof, which contributed to his decision to remove himself from his support network including his psychiatric care and not continuing to work with his team of mental health professionals.

Puts his death into some context. It's very common for mental illness to return when treatment is discontinued, I can personally attest to that more than once. There's no shame in accepting you need some help to be happy and healthy. No different to someone requiring heart medication for the rest of their life to be well.
 

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BlackGun1

All Australian
Oct 13, 2007
967
1,006
Qld
AFL Club
Brisbane Lions
“The road leading up to last Monday’s events began eight months ago when Danny made the decision to take himself off his prescribed medication. At this point Danny felt invincible, like the true competitor and proud man that he was; he felt that he had beaten the disease.

“In fact, he felt bullet proof, which contributed to his decision to remove himself from his support network including his psychiatric care and not continuing to work with his team of mental health professionals.


Puts his death into some context. It's very common for mental illness to return when treatment is discontinued, I can personally attest to that more than once. There's no shame in accepting you need some help to be happy and healthy. No different to someone requiring heart medication for the rest of their life to be well.
I've been 'in remission' for some time now from Anxiety/secondary depression but couldn't imagine ever not going off my meds. Sad, but i've faced that reality and so far, so good.
 

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