Autopsy Round 9 = Sydney 72-42 Collingwood

[Tarkyn_24]

10 Things I hate About You - The Collingwood Version.


1) We will spoon up multiple times in the next 3 years. Don't believe we can't this year. It's 5 years before we will even remotely challenge.

2) Everything about us is broken, and will not fix quickly, hence see 1) above.

3) 1.10 for 3 quarters in good conditions is all you need to know. It sums up our level of inadequacy in a simple, numerical formula. That's not enough scoring shots in 3 quarters. Or goals. Or a conversion rate you can accept. All of it, unacceptable, and a direct consequence of our lack of

- a gameplan
- acceptable skills
- forwards who are actually forwards with goal nous
- ball movement and link and run
- connection as a team, and between lines. We are a bunch of individuals out there not a single entity.

4) We have no midfield, and yet we leave one of our few midfielders in the VFL. If he is being disciplined, admit it. Otherwise, you look like idiots.

5) We have no discernable idea how to make it better or mix it up. Nothing is tried, our coaches just sit there with a look like the Germans in 1945 on the Eastern Front on their faces and await the avalanche.

6) We play players who are not AFL standard and we know damned well now are not AFL standard, who have no position in which they make a positive difference, but we keep selecting them. Cases in point, Thomas and C Brown. Neither are forwards. Or Midfielders. They exist, like a pair of running shoes draped over a power line, by their very existence begging the question as to the existential purpose they serve, but remain, mute testimony to the unknowable nature of life.

7) Grundy's contract is concrete in our collective boots

The Rime of the Overpaid Ruckman

"God save thee, noble ruckman!
From the fiends, that plague thee thus!--
Why lookst thou so?" "With my hot manager
I shot the albatross."

Ah! well a-day! what evil looks
Had I from old and young!
Instead of a Normie, an Albatross
About my neck was hung

Tapouts, tapouts everywhere,
And yet our score did shrink;
Tapouts, tapouts everywhere,
And sometimes a kick I'd dink.

But day after day, day after day,
We suck, no dare nor motion;
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean.

8) The complete lack of physical development of many of our players is astounding. Both Browns look like I could knock them over by farting and both have been round long enough for that not to be the case. We have gone from a club with player development at least in our young brigade amongst the best, to amongst the worst. That does not bode well for our immediate future, which will be determined almost entirely by how fast our players under 22 can play consistently at AFL level.

9) Our selection is mystifying. Madgen plays horribly in the firsts, and is dropped, where he proceeds to play worse in the VFL. He is then selected as the sub. Ditto the continued selection of C Brown and Thomas. You send a message to every single player that we have no selection integrity, and that is a dangerous message to send.

10) There is nothing to enjoy in watching us, nothing to be excited about, nothing to leaven the horrible shitshow. We are defined by absence, characterised by inadequacy, remarkable only in a negative sense. We are vapour.

And, worst of all - and it merits a bonus line item

11) The people who did this to us are mostly still there.

9 isn’t really justifiable - there are no other options. The revolving door of kids are currently not up to it and their senior efforts do not justify ongoing selection with the exception of Poulter and McCreery. Henry is still
developing and his VFL performances merited selection so I’ll give him a chance but there were a number of weak, sloppy efforts that were unparalleled. Even with a Swans player on a platter at ground level and prone he barely laid an ineffectual tackle.

On the basis of those coming in, selection integrity is absolutely there - with the exception of the two scapegoats Buckley has picked out (see M Cox, B Sier)

 

[Nuffsaid]

I’ve reached apathy which is kind of a nice place to be.
We are going to die out in most games which is a product of ‘play the kids’.
I’m surprised by how quickly Sidey has dropped away and he may not be in the team by years end at this rate which is sad - as he has been a guy who has sacrificed a payday for the greater good over the journey and he must feel a little betrayed over what has gone on in recent times.
Poulter and Mcreery look like they will make it. Henry needs 18mths in the gym he is so easily brushed aside and seems to lose his legs quickly.
I’m dumbfounded how WHE could produce almost the best Q of the season - he led all comers at disposals, tackles, marks at qt - and then go back to his disappearing act!
The cupboard is so bare. With NM winning we move closer to pick 1 in mid year draft which is a bonus!
I intend to have $20 against us every week for the rest of the year and cheer the kids on.

 

[JB1975]

I'm infatuated with Caleb Poulter. It's difficult to know what to make of my feelings. I really love his hair.

I also love that he's a natural competitor, and today I saw some good bursts of speed from him as well.

There are some other positives, but they aren't worth writing home about. We're in for sustained pain.

The negatives aren't worth dwelling on too much, either. We have a shallow pool of players, not at all studded with stars, and it is inevitable that they will try (which they do) and mostly fail.

These are the hard times.

 

[BuildEmUp]

I’ve reached apathy which is kind of a nice place to be.
We are going to die out in most games which is a product of ‘play the kids’.
I’m surprised by how quickly Sidey has dropped away and he may not be in the team by years end at this rate which is sad - as he has been a guy who has sacrificed a payday for the greater good over the journey and he must feel a little betrayed over what has gone on in recent times.
Poulter and Mcreery look like they will make it. Henry needs 18mths in the gym he is so easily brushed aside and seems to lose his legs quickly.
I’m dumbfounded how WHE could produce almost the best Q of the season - he led all comers at disposals, tackles, marks at qt - and then go back to his disappearing act!
The cupboard is so bare. With NM winning we move closer to pick 1 in mid year draft which is a bonus!
I intend to have $20 against us every week for the rest of the year and cheer the kids on.

Note what Bux said in presser - he move to to half forward to change the game plan .. WTF what a great flipping move that was!

 

[Gone Critical]

When you look at how many players have under 50 games it is to be expected. What I can’t understand is how callum brown, Josh Thomas and Chris Mayne are getting a walk up game every week - what do we benefit from this? (Can maybe excuse Callum brown - even then he hasn’t been great for a while)


On iPhone using BigFooty.com mobile app

Cal Brown is very borderline but Thomas and Mayne are both backing up most matches and doing ok.

There is no point in throwing the kids in , gifting games, when they are not yet best 22. It hurts more often than helps. Ollie Henry for one is a player whose progress will have been set back by his senior experiences so far this season. Hopefully he becomes a player but being smashed about, unable to matc the opposition will likely damage his confidence. He looked very tentative today and didn’t seem to want to be in the midst of it. That doesn’t help.

 

[Tarkyn_24]

Maybe the manager of the account would rather not deal with the toxicity?

Internet tough guys deserve an outlet too!

 

[lenny&carl]

42 points in a game of football.

That’s deplorable.

I’d rather us attack and lose by 10 goals. It’s boring to watch us play.

Its been hard work for quite a long time. God knows what happened in 18.

 

[Kreme Pie]

Every week there are more and more brain farts on the field from our players. Its getting worse every week.

Pendles had about 4-5 of them today. Arguably the best decision maker in the game the last 10 years... Concerning.

 

[Sea fog]

Its been hard work for quite a long time. God knows what happened in 18.

19 was okay in the main too.

 

[lenny&carl]

To be fair, this *is* a highlights clip, but compare this to the poo we've had to watch over the Buckley years...

 

[lenny&carl]

19 was okay in the main too.

I didn't reckon. 3rd/4th is a result I can't whinge about, but it was one good quarter here & there, with little flair or conviction.

 

[stormskye]

Buckley defends game plan despite dour defeat

'You'd hate to play in the Collingwood forward line'

www.google.com.au

Just wow..

 

[sr36]

To be fair, this *is* a highlights clip, but compare this to the poo we've had to watch over the Buckley years...

I liked Malthouse teams. 14 incredibly disciplined blokes giving a rigid defensive structure and 4 really talented blokes with the licence to do whatever they wanted on and off the field.

 

[lenny&carl]

I liked Malthouse teams. 14 incredibly disciplined blokes giving a rigid defensive structure and 4 really talented blokes with the licence to do whatever they wanted on and off the field.

It was certainly more watch-able! And maybe reflected a more mature understanding of humans and reality...you can't colour-by-numbers a masterpiece. At the highest levels, talent outplays conscientiousness.

 

[Sea fog]

I didn't reckon. 3rd/4th is a result I can't whinge about, but it was one good quarter here & there, with little flair or conviction.

Maybe but we had an easy draw in 18 and tougher one in 19 made worse by injuries.

 

[Shade]

Buckley defends game plan despite dour defeat

'You'd hate to play in the Collingwood forward line'

www.google.com.au

Just wow..

Reaching ross lyon levels of boredom this bloke as each week goes by its not about us scoring its just negate the opponent at all costs.

 

[Leviathan Pie]

How embarrassed would Grundy be to put his hand out for $1m per season?

Maybe he's not, and maybe its only me who thinks he should have some pride in his performance.

But what a disgrace.

 

[Sea fog]

How embarrassed would Grundy be to put his hand out for $1m per season?

Maybe he's not, and maybe its only me who thinks he should have some pride in his performance.

But what a disgrace.

Agree but my info is that it is definitely not 1 mil he is on, but still the money is huge and too much.

 

[wcv1475]

Our game style is horrible and clearly doesn't work, being a forward target for Collingwood would be a nightmare. I think i have said it before the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result (our current coaches do this).



This may not belong in game day thread but someone before mentioned the Malthouse era. I can clearly remember the Tony Shaw coaching era (horrible) and then when Malthouse came to the club it was poor and far from professional, he (along with Ed) turned us into a powerful club, we ran into a side for the ages the Lions and it took 10 odd years with low points before we eventually won a flag but that whole era I felt like Mick could lead a group of young men and develop a team, the biggest thing he seemed to be able to manage was different personalities, Shaw, Swan, Johnson and Didak through to total opposites in Pendlebury, Jolly and Prestigiacomo and get the best out of all of them something I don’t think Bucks can do. This to me is the biggest difference I think Mick would have been able to manage Grundy, De Goey and get the best out of the different personalities Hardwick seems to be able to do it, look at this week and so does Clarko, I even think to an extent Fagan at Brisbane is good at it.





And to all the people say Mick had 10 odd years he came to a club that had a much lower starting point.

 

[PonsfordMagpie]

Buckley defends game plan despite dour defeat

'You'd hate to play in the Collingwood forward line'

www.google.com.au

Just wow..

Good lord, that's frightening.

Stubborn until the end.

 

[Aussie pie]

I don’t mind if we have to rebuild but if you rebuild something then it has to change for it to be better otherwise it’s window dressing. Nothing I saw today looks like changing, the same old tired game plan with the mediocre group of players. (We know the ones I mean) The problem obviously is the lack of depth, the VFL game wasn’t much better than the AFL. No exciting forwards pushing to get a game, nothing but a bunch of plodders.

 

[Sea fog]

I don’t mind if we have to rebuild but if you rebuild something then it has to change for it to be better otherwise it’s window dressing. Nothing I saw today looks like changing, the same old tired game plan with the mediocre group of players. (We know the ones I mean) The problem obviously is the lack of depth, the VFL game wasn’t much better than the AFL. No exciting forwards pushing to get a game, nothing but a bunch of plodders.

Agree, we are a club full of plodders almost bereft of all talent. We are not an unwatchable club with zero relevance to the competition. Thanks Eddie and Bucks for destroying us. Even Sydney fans reckon this pair has wrecked our club. We will be in the wilderness for eons at this rate. Who would we go to the footy to watch among our talentless group? How did it come to this?

 

[PonsfordMagpie]

Agree, we are a club full of plodders almost bereft of all talent. We are not an unwatchable club with zero relevance to the competition. Thanks Eddie and Bucks for destroying us. Even Sydney fans reckon this pair has wrecked our club. We will be in the wilderness for eons at this rate. Who would we go to the footy to watch among our talentless group? How did it come to this?

We'll be okay mate even if things are bad now.

The club just needs to grow a pair and start preparing for life post-Buckley.

 

[Sea fog]

We'll be okay mate even if things are bad now.

The club just needs to grow a pair and start preparing for life post-Buckley.

And sooner rather than later for our sanity.

 

[PonsfordMagpie]

And sooner rather than later for our sanity.

Just hang in there mate.

Hopefully a change is made soon.