Marlowe
𝓤𝓷𝓽𝓸𝓾𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓫𝓵𝓮
- Mar 12, 2012
- 29,928
- 53,376
- AFL Club
- Melbourne
- Other Teams
- Gold City Royals
I admit, I cracked and listened to Harvey's podcast. It was a good job by all, although I skipped through most of it searching for references to the Royals. There weren't many but the ones I did catch were in the midst of a segment where Yakker was comparing clubs to types of fish and a follow up where Loonerty was comparing clubs to clubs in the EPL (I think we got Leicester? I would have gone Arsenal as I don't remember the last time the Gunners won anything even though it feels as if they have, which is familiar to me, but I don't pretend to understand the world' game so I digress).
I liked the concept though, and, while it probably exists in some form in some thread from the past four years, I wanted to take the risk and make a thread for it.
Feel free to pick any topic you want to compare to SFA clubs. Movies, shows, albums, artists, Survivor contestants, video games, NFL teams, cars, trees, models, politicians, human body parts, SFA clubs if you want to be weird. The world is your oyster.
I will start by comparing SFA clubs to NBA teams because I got this idea watching 1996 NBA draft highlights and it might be a good demonstration for what I am talking about in case to this point you're lost.
1. The Wonders are... the Los Angeles Lakers.
Both have gold in their colours. Both have won their league plenty of times. Plenty of people hate them. The Wonders currently have no LeBron or AD but this comparison doesn't have to be fixed to today.
2. The Royals are... the Los Angeles Clippers.
The anti-Lakers. The eternal baby brother, perennially in the shadows. I've always thought of the Royals are like the Wonders if they just never won anything. Plenty of dark periods, a few bright spots. Some cult favourites. The Season 17/18 teams very similiar to those Lamar Odom/Darius Miles/Quentin Richardson/Corey Maggette years. Uncle Leo our Michael Olowokandi. Blacky our Elton Brand. Filthy, KP, Noobz and co. our Kawhi and Paul George. Somewhere in the years I was absent I am sure we had our Lob City players as well.
3. The Demons are... the Boston Celtics.
Storied past. Lots of historic veterans. Pretty good present day nucleus. cooney is your Bill Russell. Eth your Larry Bird. Yakker your Marcus Smart. Could go on and on but I have a headache.
4. The Swamprats are... the Detroit Pistons.
Their peak spam days are the posting equivalent of the Bad Boy Pistons, in my opinion. No one wanted to face that s**t but it kind of got the job done. The Rats won a premiership outside of that window but not everything can be 1-for-1. Ant Bear's admin days potentially comparable to Isiah Thomas' stint running the Knicks too. Kennedy Parker's name changes very comparable to the constantly evolving hair of Dennis Rodman.
5. The Gumbies are... the Minnesota Timberwolves.
Some decent rosters and posters at various times but just no sustained success. A few sporadic trips to the finals/playoffs. Gumbies won a premiership. The T-Wolves once made the Western Conference Finals. Outside of that it's kind of eh. They had the same logo for a time. StFly the Gumbies' Kevin Garnett. Barrybran their KAT.
6. The Bombers are... the New York Knicks.
Only people who care about either are their fans.
7. The Dragons are... the Chicago Bulls.
DYK The Filth Wizard played for the Dragons and Michael Jordan played for the Bulls? That is the extent of this comparison.
8. The Roys are... the Miami Heat minus the Big Three era.
Mobbs is basically Pat Riley. FB is Dwyane Wade. TedDougChris is, IDK... Bam Adebayo? They've won the league once. That's pretty cool. When they've been bad they've been real bad, but they're good they're usually pretty average. No fans, really, but no haters either. Florida is full of old people too.
9. The Furies are... the Indiana Pacers.
The Furies are more successful, but the Pacers are rarely a lottery team. The Furies cycle through captains the way the Pacers systematically cycle through coaches, yet they've maintained a pretty consistent culture for ages. They're kind of dull but no team in the Sweet FA is more likely to run into the stands are punch fans as much as the Furies are.
10. The Warriors are... the New Orleans Pelicans.
Haven't won s**t but have been exciting at various times. The Baron Davis (FR) years, the CP3 (BigJoeD_) years, the AD (Woosh) years, the present moment Zion (TheInjuryFactory) year.
11. The Las Vegas Bears are... the Toronto Raptors.
Historically they've had Vince Carter (pants), Tracy McGrady (brahj) and Andrea Bargnani (Quiv) although it didn't result in much. We saw what they're capable of with a generational superstar in Kawhi (JWS) though. What are they without them? Kind of the same, I guess. ABE is your Siakim, Matera92 your Kyle Lowry, Test Tickle potentially, ironically, DeMar DeRozan.
12. The East Side Hawks are... the Portland Trail Blazers (minus a Dame Lillard).
Have won once. But it was so long ago it may as well have never happened. They make the finals/playoffs with high regularity, only bottoming out occasionally, but they never seem to win anything. Nice bunch of guys for the most part.
I liked the concept though, and, while it probably exists in some form in some thread from the past four years, I wanted to take the risk and make a thread for it.
Feel free to pick any topic you want to compare to SFA clubs. Movies, shows, albums, artists, Survivor contestants, video games, NFL teams, cars, trees, models, politicians, human body parts, SFA clubs if you want to be weird. The world is your oyster.
I will start by comparing SFA clubs to NBA teams because I got this idea watching 1996 NBA draft highlights and it might be a good demonstration for what I am talking about in case to this point you're lost.
1. The Wonders are... the Los Angeles Lakers.
Both have gold in their colours. Both have won their league plenty of times. Plenty of people hate them. The Wonders currently have no LeBron or AD but this comparison doesn't have to be fixed to today.
2. The Royals are... the Los Angeles Clippers.
The anti-Lakers. The eternal baby brother, perennially in the shadows. I've always thought of the Royals are like the Wonders if they just never won anything. Plenty of dark periods, a few bright spots. Some cult favourites. The Season 17/18 teams very similiar to those Lamar Odom/Darius Miles/Quentin Richardson/Corey Maggette years. Uncle Leo our Michael Olowokandi. Blacky our Elton Brand. Filthy, KP, Noobz and co. our Kawhi and Paul George. Somewhere in the years I was absent I am sure we had our Lob City players as well.
3. The Demons are... the Boston Celtics.
Storied past. Lots of historic veterans. Pretty good present day nucleus. cooney is your Bill Russell. Eth your Larry Bird. Yakker your Marcus Smart. Could go on and on but I have a headache.
4. The Swamprats are... the Detroit Pistons.
Their peak spam days are the posting equivalent of the Bad Boy Pistons, in my opinion. No one wanted to face that s**t but it kind of got the job done. The Rats won a premiership outside of that window but not everything can be 1-for-1. Ant Bear's admin days potentially comparable to Isiah Thomas' stint running the Knicks too. Kennedy Parker's name changes very comparable to the constantly evolving hair of Dennis Rodman.
5. The Gumbies are... the Minnesota Timberwolves.
Some decent rosters and posters at various times but just no sustained success. A few sporadic trips to the finals/playoffs. Gumbies won a premiership. The T-Wolves once made the Western Conference Finals. Outside of that it's kind of eh. They had the same logo for a time. StFly the Gumbies' Kevin Garnett. Barrybran their KAT.
6. The Bombers are... the New York Knicks.
Only people who care about either are their fans.
7. The Dragons are... the Chicago Bulls.
DYK The Filth Wizard played for the Dragons and Michael Jordan played for the Bulls? That is the extent of this comparison.
8. The Roys are... the Miami Heat minus the Big Three era.
Mobbs is basically Pat Riley. FB is Dwyane Wade. TedDougChris is, IDK... Bam Adebayo? They've won the league once. That's pretty cool. When they've been bad they've been real bad, but they're good they're usually pretty average. No fans, really, but no haters either. Florida is full of old people too.
9. The Furies are... the Indiana Pacers.
The Furies are more successful, but the Pacers are rarely a lottery team. The Furies cycle through captains the way the Pacers systematically cycle through coaches, yet they've maintained a pretty consistent culture for ages. They're kind of dull but no team in the Sweet FA is more likely to run into the stands are punch fans as much as the Furies are.
10. The Warriors are... the New Orleans Pelicans.
Haven't won s**t but have been exciting at various times. The Baron Davis (FR) years, the CP3 (BigJoeD_) years, the AD (Woosh) years, the present moment Zion (TheInjuryFactory) year.
11. The Las Vegas Bears are... the Toronto Raptors.
Historically they've had Vince Carter (pants), Tracy McGrady (brahj) and Andrea Bargnani (Quiv) although it didn't result in much. We saw what they're capable of with a generational superstar in Kawhi (JWS) though. What are they without them? Kind of the same, I guess. ABE is your Siakim, Matera92 your Kyle Lowry, Test Tickle potentially, ironically, DeMar DeRozan.
12. The East Side Hawks are... the Portland Trail Blazers (minus a Dame Lillard).
Have won once. But it was so long ago it may as well have never happened. They make the finals/playoffs with high regularity, only bottoming out occasionally, but they never seem to win anything. Nice bunch of guys for the most part.
