Analysis Whipping Boys - 2022 edition

[Vicky Park]

good god you are a disappointment to me, whipping thread. I swam all the way across the bass strait for you to whinge about wokes. I don't like it when you fail to identify a target. I dont like it when you turn my world about. Let me tell you something honey, if I was you I would take a day off from all this bs and have a big long think about what makes a decent whipping boy (girl,it,them,they,wgaf) and go from there.
Whytf aren't you mob having this conversation in the coffee lounge or something? This is a whipping thread yes?

Derek Hine is up for grabs this week, starting tonight. We all know he will draft a mid-height utility player with our first pick, while overlooking three 200cm KPPs. We’re just waiting for this to be confirmed. See you around 10pm.

 

[sr36]

Derek Hine is up for grabs this week, starting tonight. We all know he will draft a mid-height utility player with our first pick, while overlooking three 200cm KPPs. We’re just waiting for this to be confirmed. See you around 10pm.

Spuds are bloody versatile - roast, boil, mash - you name it - unlike tall blokes who can take marks and kick goals - they can only play a couple of roles.

 

[Markfs]

And so once again, we get to that time of the year that Derek Hine has prepared all year for. Hours and hours of studying videos, analysing his performances for over a decade. No stone left unturned.....

And now it has arrived. Draft day. Another chance before the cameras. Another chance to appeal to the magpie faithful and to impress those who run the media in this country.....

All his dreams and ambitions resting on a handful of media events. The first this year being on the AFL site as the ramp up begins to his big day.
He's been balancing it up for months. What strategies to give away. What ones to use to tease the audience. It's a fine balance.

It's a critical time for Hiney as he lays down the foundation for a post footy media career. He's predictably nervous. Can he get the media to say that he has smashed this draft, despite the failures of previous drafts? Will his usual message of this draft being a win for the club, ring hollow in the cold post draft analysis? Time will tell...

 

[Markfs]

Derek Hine is up for grabs this week, starting tonight. We all know he will draft a mid-height utility player with our first pick, while overlooking three 200cm KPPs. We’re just waiting for this to be confirmed. See you around 10pm.

Nothing over 193cm of course, but could Hiney return back to the future and get someone at 177? Will the corpse of blair be reinflated for another stint at the club? Most experts will say 186 to 189 but maybe derek will return to the short people one last time....

 

[Vicky Park]

Nothing over 193cm of course, but could Hiney return back to the future and get someone at 177? Will the corpse of blair be reinflated for another stint at the club? Most experts will say 186 to 189 but maybe derek will return to the short people one last time....

Re the bolded, well he might, but only where he’s sure the player will grow 10cms over summer, and is therefore a bargain pick.

Derek knows his body types as well as he knows - or avoids - the elite pathways.

I’ve been reading about this recently on Big Footy. ‘Ecto’ something bodies where it is scientifically proven that you can predict the future height and weight of teenage boys. While it sounds a bit creepy, I believe it because I read it on here. Derek knows his ‘Ectos’.

 

[Pistol Night]

Re the bolded, well he might, but only where he’s sure the player will grow 10cms over summer, and is therefore a bargain pick.

Derek knows his body types as well as he knows - or avoids - the elite pathways.

I’ve been reading about this recently on Big Footy. ‘Ecto’ something bodies where it is scientifically proven that you can predict the future height and weight of teenage boys. While it sounds a bit creepy, I believe it because I read it on here. Derek knows his ‘Ectos’.

Someone needs to just tell him " Hey Dekka, forget all that scientific s**t and pick one of those tall pricks"

 

[Markfs]

A short game of pick-the-error... you can stop counting at 5

 

[Markfs]

Here's a blast from the past. A player who would have copped a lot of "encouragement" if he was on the list these days. You could call his time at the Pies a "summer job". A short time to sow the oats until he used his connections at scotch college to get a high-paying gig of endless friday arvo piss-ups...

 

[Markfs]

Interesting snipit from the LinkedIn site below. Some might say that Derek has probably forgotten about the site and doesn't use it anymore. However, he posts regularly on it and as recent as 3 months ago. He likes to keep his contacts close to him.

The site doesn't include his 20 years as a Firey.....but it does include his 19 years as a general manager list management ...

 

[sr36]

Someone needs to just tell him " Hey Dekka, forget all that scientific s**t and pick one of those tall pricks"

But when judging how tall a player is, you can't just go on height - a 188cm ecto born in December is actually taller than any KPP - or so Dekka told me.

 

[Pistol Night]

But when judging how tall a player is, you can't just go on height - a 188cm ecto born in December is actually taller than any KPP - or so Dekka told me.

So December born babies are giants? This is huge news

 

[Cyclops]

AFL site mentioned we are eyeing Harry Barnett, and one of the reviews said he was Grundy like, could slot straight in as WB as well as R.

Spuds are bloody versatile - roast, boil, mash - you name it - unlike tall blokes who can take marks and kick goals - they can only play a couple of roles.

Or could this be our next whipping boy?

 

[sr36]

Interesting snipit from the LinkedIn site below. Some might say that Derek has probably forgotten about the site and doesn't use it anymore. However, he posts regularly on it and as recent as 3 months ago. He likes to keep his contacts close to him.

The site doesn't include his 20 years as a Firey.....but it does include his 19 years as a general manager list management ...

View attachment 1562576

Surprised he doesn't make a bigger deal about his potato farming.

 

[Markfs]

So December born babies are giants? This is huge news

December babies from good parents and it's a certainty.....Name one person you know who was born in Dec from good parents who cant win a brownlow...

 

[Markfs]

Surprised he doesn't make a bigger deal about his potato farming.

I think he likes to do that in person.... I havent watched today's interview yet

 

[sr36]

I think he likes to do that in person.... I havent watched today's interview yet

Here's a sneak preview of Dekka's draft board:

Best Rated Potatoes in the World

 

[Pistol Night]

Here's a sneak preview of Dekka's draft board:

Best Rated Potatoes in the World

I assume Yukon Gold is just a pipe dream and we'll pick the best available potato?

 

[sr36]

I assume Yukon Gold is just a pipe dream and we'll pick the best available potato?

Just read up on him. He's a really versatile spud - Dekka would be really keen - might offer everything to trade up for him.

 

[neilk]

AJ ran dead last i the 2km time trial. Was lapped by ND and another guy using a zimmer frame. I think he may be attempting to get himself an early whipping boy nomination for 2023.

 

[Pistol Night]

AJ ran dead last i the 2km time trial. Was lapped by ND and another guy using a zimmer frame. I think he may be attempting to get himself an early whipping boy nomination for 2023.

AJ figures why waste all that good running in November. Genius move

 

[neilk]

AJ figures why waste all that good running in November. Genius move

He certainly didn't waste too much in last September

 

[Pistol Night]

He certainly didn't waste too much in last September

Yeah disappointing. Hes got the tools though

 

[Markfs]

I think Hiney will throw a few of those away....the ones that get picked earlier in the year.... I'd go for the thick skinned ones but he always likes the thin skinned fragile ones. I dont think he'd touch the grubby one....not from a good family

I was thinking of a contest. Pick the height of our first picked..... I say 187cm. The closest pick gets a free seminar with Derek on how to present draft picks to the media...how to find the runts of the litter.....all the necessary stuff for an ace recruiter...

And it's height as of the draft board. You cant argue that the guy will be 10cm taller by tyler brown

21

Tyler Brown

Age

24

Ht

192cm

Wt

84kg

Pos.

M/F

Career

Season

Last 5

D

11.0

3star

K

4.0

2star

HB

7.0

4star

M

1.0

1star

T

1.4

3star

CL

0.6

3star

D

11.0

3star

K

4.0

1star

HB

7.0

4star

M

1.0

1star

T

1.4

2star

CL

0.6

3star

D

11.0

3star

K

4.0

2star

HB

7.0

5star

M

1.0

1star

T

1.4

4star

CL

0.6

3star

's birthday. So my guess is 187cm.

 

[sr36]

I think Hiney will throw a few of those away....the ones that get picked earlier in the year.... I'd go for the thick skinned ones but he always likes the thin skinned fragile ones. I dont think he'd touch the grubby one....not from a good family

I was thinking of a contest. Pick the height of our first picked..... I say 187cm. The closest pick gets a free seminar with Derek on how to present draft picks to the media...how to find the runts of the litter.....all the necessary stuff for an ace recruiter...

And it's height as of the draft board. You cant argue that the guy will be 10cm taller by tyler brown's birthday. So my guess is 187cm.

You just don't get it. 187cm from a good family who had the wisdom to shag in March and thus give birth in December is close to 197cm, particularly if the kid is s**t at footy so didn't get picked to train in the elite pathways.

 

[Pistol Night]

You just don't get it. 187cm from a good family who had the wisdom to shag in March and thus give birth in December is close to 197cm, particularly if they're s**t at footy so didn't get picked to train in the elite pathways.

I propose Fly introduces compulsory nightly shagging in March for the players to give any future father/sons the all important December advantage