Analysis Whipping Boys - 2022 edition

[jaffa23]

The Thread is Open - Markfs has led with a good bandaid opening,,,,

 

[Markfs]

The Thread is Open - Markfs has led with a good bandaid opening,,,,

its going to be a tough week for this thread.....there's going to be a lot of happy supporters but we're just going to have to push through.

i think the tall brown did a pretty good job when you think he had zero expectations and had the opportunity to run around without an opponent for much of the match and still didnt do much. He hasnt done his reputation any harm.

I thought callum brown had his usual impact and i have to say that the madge didnt make his usual mistakes. And to the Noble crowd, I will admit that his ugly mug seemed to get in the way of the ball a few times. His fans should note that gary lyon was singing his praises and that is no praise at all.

 

[sr36]

Today really showed how important our whipping is. We put the whip down halfway through that Geelong game and left it idle for far too long. Without us having really lifted our whipping, those spuds would have spudded it big time - as per normal.

 

[Markfs]

Today really showed how important our whipping is. We put the whip down halfway through that Geelong game and left it idle for far too long. Without us having really lifted our whipping, those spuds would have spudded it big time - as per normal.

There's no doubt how valuable the whip is... and i think we should remember that the gameday thread provides a ton of motivation to the younger players and it has done that for a number of years. A shout out to the brave souls who unselfishly rubbish our players in order to improve their performance. But as our useless coach continually says, we're just trying to be the best we can be....and in the cases of the two browns, that's a pitiful level of performance.

 

[sr36]

Murphy looked at home in a wet weather game of chest marks and hacking the ball forward. In fact a lot of our players did.

 

[Markfs]

A special mention for the coach and his press conference.....if you feel like wasting 7 minutes of your life, it's a worthwhile watch....

 

[Markfs]

Murphy looked at home in a wet weather game of chest marks and hacking the ball forward. In fact a lot of our players did.

yeh.... we really need about 20 situations where we can get murph running back taking chest marks..... we probably need to tee it up with the opposition to kick it over his shoulder.... he cant do much else...

and the wet weather was good for guys who cant pick the ball up.....which is more than half the team..

 

[Vicky Park]

Murphy looked at home in a wet weather game of chest marks and hacking the ball forward. In fact a lot of our players did.

Are you sure he played? I kept looking for someone who fitted his description but I couldn’t see anyone. There was a player who might have been him, who at one point was doubled over like he was looking for a lost earring in the mud. But then he disappeared in the general mayhem. I’ll try again to find him next week, and then I can whip him with confidence.

 

[sr36]

Are you sure he played? I kept looking for someone who fitted his description but I couldn’t see anyone. There was a player who might have been him, who at one point was doubled over like he was looking for a lost earring in the mud. But then he disappeared in the general mayhem. I’ll try again to find him next week, and then I can whip him with confidence.

His ginga has faded, but that was him. Lying down is one of his specialities. I was surprised when he got up. He usually stays down for 2 months.

 

[jaffa23]

Old Mother Hubbard,,,

"Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard,
To give the Whipping Boys a bone:
When she got there,
The cupboard was bare,
And so the Whipping Boys had none,,"

There is always light at the end of the whipping tunnel even after a famous victory,, so votes:

1) Old Mother Hubbard - STFU. There is always room for whipping so shove your stupid meaningless nursey rhymes where they fit...

2) High Performance Manager Jarrod Wade - You made the call, so I look forward to your updates this week re: TPF (Texas Pinky Finger)... "Mase unfortunately tore a nail off his pinky, so we think this could be an 8 to 10 week injury"

3) Justin Longmuir

Justin Longmuir

Age

43

Ht

196cm

Wt

98kg

Pos.

F/R

Career

Season

Last 5

D

11.4

3star

K

6.9

3star

HB

4.5

3star

M

4.3

4star

T

1.4

3star

G

1.2

4star

No current season stats available

D

7.0

2star

K

3.6

2star

HB

3.4

3star

M

2.0

3star

T

0.6

3star

G

0.6

3star

.... The so called previous Backline Messiah of Collingwood got a touch up from both McCrae and Leppitsch in the coaching ranks today. Welcome JLO to Whipping 2022

 

[Markfs]

Are you sure he played? I kept looking for someone who fitted his description but I couldn’t see anyone. There was a player who might have been him, who at one point was doubled over like he was looking for a lost earring in the mud. But then he disappeared in the general mayhem. I’ll try again to find him next week, and then I can whip him with confidence.

This is not the thread to ask the question "did he play?"... because does being listed on the team sheet equate to playing? or do you actually have to do something constructive?

I came on to give a slap in the back to that geelong grammar poonce Oily henry..... who overcame his fear of footballs to snag a couple of sausage rolls... Evidently, the coach said that he stayed back late after school and practiced his kicking...instead of heading out to the melbourne club to hob knob it with the rich and famous...

 

[Vicky Park]

I came on to give a slap in the back to that geelong grammar poonce Oily henry..... who overcame his fear of footballs to snag a couple of sausage rolls... Evidently, the coach said that he stayed back late after school and practiced his kicking...instead of heading out to the melbourne club to hob knob it with the rich and famous..

The Melbourne Club was on strike due to the removal of the Liberal Party. O’Henry instead stumbled into the Geebung Polo Club in Hawthorn where one of his former prefects gave him some tips on the yips and how to get rid of them. It worked a treat.

O’H was last seen running from the pub in his chinos, with Graham Wright chasing him down Auburn Road, waving his unsigned contract.

 

[sr36]

The Melbourne Club was on strike due to the removal of the Liberal Party. O’Henry instead stumbled into the Geebung Polo Club in Hawthorn where one of his former prefects gave him some tips on the yips and how to get rid of them. It worked a treat.

O’H was last seen running from the pub in his chinos, with Graham Wright chasing him down Auburn Road, waving his unsigned contract.

He's refusing to sign until everyone stops the vulgar infantile shortening of his name. He's willing to negotiate the esquire at the end, but he's Oliver or he'll take his name elsewhere. He might be open to his childhood nickname of Mimsy.

 

[Vicky Park]

He's refusing to sign until everyone stops the vulgar infantile shortening of his name. He's willing to negotiate the esquire at the end, but he's Oliver or he'll take his name elsewhere.

Well, some of us are more infantile than others.

 

[Markfs]

The Melbourne Club was on strike due to the removal of the Liberal Party. O’Henry instead stumbled into the Geebung Polo Club in Hawthorn where one of his former prefects gave him some tips on the yips and how to get rid of them. It worked a treat.

O’H was last seen running from the pub in his chinos, with Graham Wright chasing him down Auburn Road, waving his unsigned contract.

I wouldn't be too desperate to sign up this jelly spined foppish wimp too quickly. Short back and sides is a minimum, but i'd still be suspicious that he would lapse back to his usual form of riding on the coat-tails of the working class players.....

some rules need to be made clear - flat whites, local beer, kmart clothing....

i'm like most bf posters. i'll be ready to turn on him savagely at a moment's notice.

 

[Markfs]

ok ok i have to admit....he's trying hard to fit in to our team culture....I'd like to see some street smart talk but you cant question his lack of intellectual capacity. I have been told that he's naturally a bit thick and it was his daddy's money that got him through the geelong grammar years.... so I'd just like to remind him that he's at collingwood now and he can't get daddy to pay someone to do his homework.

Post Match: Oliver Henry

Hear from the super sub Oliver Henry after his 4 goal performance

www.collingwoodfc.com.au

 

[sr36]

ok ok i have to admit....he's trying hard to fit in to our team culture....I'd like to see some street smart talk but you cant question his lack of intellectual capacity. I have been told that he's naturally a bit thick and it was his daddy's money that got him through the geelong grammar years.... so I'd just like to remind him that he's at collingwood now and he can't get daddy to pay someone to do his homework.

Post Match: Oliver Henry

Hear from the super sub Oliver Henry after his 4 goal performance

www.collingwoodfc.com.au

He comes across as the kind of bloke who would have deservedly received some good old fashioned private school fazing - you'd think it would have toughened him up more though.

 

[Markfs]

He's refusing to sign until everyone stops the vulgar infantile shortening of his name. He's willing to negotiate the esquire at the end, but he's Oliver or he'll take his name elsewhere. He might be open to his childhood nickname of Mimsy.

i hope you're joking with that mimsy idea.....

if we go down the nickname path, we need to get something like Bruzza.......something like Feralpig. I love calling the bruzza bruz....bruz....bruz.....the bruz....lets sink some piss bruzzie.... it makes me feel good just thinking about it.

 

[Markfs]

He comes across as the kind of bloke who would have deservedly received some good old fashioned private school fazing - you'd think it would have toughened him up more though.

more likely he's used daddy's money to pay some winos to put on a fight to entertain him and his mates. He looks like he still gets mummsy to give him a bath

 

[Markfs]

contrast henry with tay..... who i'll admit still has problems hitting a barn door with his kicking and he's generally not up to the usual pie standard, but he does cut it as the type of bloke we're looking for....he's frustrating is tay. There are times that I hate him and there are other times when I can tolerate him.

Post Match: Taylor Adams

We caught up with Taylor after our 36 point win over the Dockers.

www.collingwoodfc.com.au

 

[sr36]

contrast henry with tay..... who i'll admit still has problems hitting a barn door with his kicking and he's generally not up to the usual pie standard, but he does cut it as the type of bloke we're looking for....he's frustrating is tay. There are times that I hate him and there are other times when I can tolerate him.

Post Match: Taylor Adams

We caught up with Taylor after our 36 point win over the Dockers.

www.collingwoodfc.com.au

There's got to be a happy medium in-between the fops like Henry and the working no-class mongrels like Adams. Each time JDG gets in a pub fight, I think he's the one who is made of the right stuff yet has some class, but then he plays footy and it's always a bit disappointing

 

[Vicky Park]

There's got to be a happy medium in-between the fops like Henry and the working no-class mongrels like Adams. Each time JDG gets in a pub fight, I think he's the one who is made of the right stuff yet has some class, but then he plays footy and it's always a bit disappointing

I hadn’t thought of JDG in this context before, but you’ve opened my eyes to the truth of his pub fights. I can’t thank you enough for showing me the error of my critical ways.

He doesn’t need to play consistent footy when he can keep getting into fights!

 

[Markfs]

There's got to be a happy medium in-between the fops like Henry and the working no-class mongrels like Adams. Each time JDG gets in a pub fight, I think he's the one who is made of the right stuff yet has some class, but then he plays footy and it's always a bit disappointing

I think you just have to recognise the fact - and a lot of BF posters know this - that it's very very difficult to really like a Pie player. We say that we love them but it's only for that moment.....and it can only be that way because no one can really meet the standard.

I just wish i lived back in the mythical four-peat years....sigh.

 

[Markfs]

i think most BF'ers would agree that there is one major statistic assessing manliness on the field and that's contested possession....

And I know it's painful to be told that we are supporting a team of wimps but we are.....a team of absolute jelly bellies...a joke....i dont think they should be allowed to pull on a pie jumper with the wimpish contested possession numbers that they are delivering.

 

[sideswipe]

There's got to be a happy medium in-between the fops like Henry and the working no-class mongrels like Adams. Each time JDG gets in a pub fight, I think he's the one who is made of the right stuff yet has some class, but then he plays footy and it's always a bit disappointing

funnily enough Tay and Ollie both went to the same school.